How do you stop yourself wanting all the things?

[Gettingabitnippynow]

I’m not a materialist person at all, but have just been to pick up a few Christmas bits for Dd and I just want all the things. They’re not particularly expensive, but would be to buy them all. Christmas candles, Christmas mugs, pjs, teddies, wooly hats, jumpers etc etc. Do you all buy all these things or just ignore? I realise it’s a bit silly to buy new every year and a waste when I have last years xmas mugs and pjs.
Just wish I was wealthy sometimes!

There's no point lecturing and wagging fingers at the OP, they aren't listening!

it's like telling someone who drinks too much that alcohol is bad for their liver, it matters not.

Think about who has made it. Such a high chance of exploited/child labour in the tat supply chain. For clothes, look up the retailer on the Good On You app.

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻^ This

It’s utter tat, don’t be a sucker.

I think about where id have to store them the other 11 months of the year and then I don't want them as much

Being broke for a few years really focuses one's mind on what will genuinely enhance one's life and what won't. It also makes you quite frugal by nature; it's been a while since I had to worry about money but I still don't like spending it and if I think something's a rip-off I will not buy it.

Moving house from houseshare to houseshare in my 20s was a very effective cure for wanting to own material possessions at all.

Getting older involves getting more self-knowledge, particularly about what "luxury" things I actually really want and which I can live without. I'm happy to spend money on fancy restaurants but absolutely nothing on interior decorations, because I don't care about the latter and get a lot of joy from the former.

My friend feels down because she’s really skint, so she says she wants to go shopping and treat herself - she needs a “pick me up”. I express surprise at the cure. It’s only £30 that won’t make a difference!
What can I say - I’m baffled!

I don't even understand the question. I never want to buy all the things. I guess it just comes down to who you are? If they will make you happy and you have the money, knock yourself out, but why not donate the old ones?

Is their mum OK with that? Just wondering, as it's still waste if mum gets rid of it. I've seen a few threads on here with mums upset with grans buying kids charity shop goods.

I don't think your friend believes treating herself will cure her being skint.
I don't understand what you mean by "It’s only £30 that won’t make a difference!". Do you mean £30 won't make a difference to how down she feels, or that £30 won't make a difference to her finances?

Either way, when our budget is constrained, if treating yourself isn't going to mean going w/o food, heating, ability to get to work, then it can help to make you feel a bit brighter. Just buying something small for yourself while you shop for the essentials can boost your mood and feelings of self worth. What do you find baffling about that?

I've grown into this! I used to find it hilarious that my mother (born in the 30's) used to use her old knickers as floor cloths. Part of the humour being that they were "substantial" enough. Now I have a bag under the sink with my son's old pants in. Ideal for the floor, outside paint work etc 🤣He's only 15 and growing at a rate of knots so the supply is steady.

I find the Christmas consumerism sickening. Don't get me started on Black Friday! A ridiculous American import. I vowed to avoid all shops in November except essential groceries as I hate the Christmas stuff being rammed down our throats for nearly a quarter of the year. It's been lovely avoiding all the tat and premature festive music. I've enjoyed autumn more, being able to separate it from the Christmas onslaught. From 1 Dec I will embrace the Christmas season without going mad in the shops. I'm happier for it.

I should have said, my concern for the state of the planet is my primary concern. There is so much waste and unnecessary plastic.

Nope, I never want to buy stuff like that - just a waste of money.

I seem to have a built in tat filter - it just doesn’t exist for me in my head so never get bought. When DS was still growing he got a new pair of PJs on Christmas Eve every year, But they were normal (nice PJs) not Christmassy ones, so they’d be worn all year round. He finished growing last year so did get some Christmas pyjamas that year, but they will fit him for years and years so he can just wear them every Christmas.

I love getting out the same Christmas decorations every year so don’t buy any new ones, we don’t have stuff like Christmas mugs etc. I like a Christmassy scented candle so buy a couple every year but that’s all.

my partner (who I don’t live with) in the other hand is an absolute tat-monger. She will buy all manner of B&M/Temu shite. Tried to make her watch the Netflix documentary about it but I think if you’re that way inclined it’s really hard to change your mind.

Just ignore it all. At the age of 60 I have more than enough stuff in my house. I'm trying to declutter meaningless stuff so my kids don't have a big job on their hands in the future. I've put a ban on any more mugs, glaases etc coming into the house. It's a waste of money & just adds to landfill

I don't buy any of those things and never have. It's nothing to do with money, I just don't like that sort of stuff and it makes me angry that so much of it will end up in landfill at some stage. Xmas pjs and mugs make me shudder.

I despair at the amount of "stuff" people seem to think is necessary these days.

How do you stop yourself? Well I do it by realising that every bit of tatt has been created by pumping co2 and likely more poisonous air pollution too, and when it reaches the end of its life it'll just be dumped somewhere. Why would you want to contribute to any of that unnecessarily?

I found my desire to buy things decreased when I stopped walking past the shops on the way to work. Is it possible to reduce how much you enter shops etc? Then you wouldn't even know this stuff was there for you to pick up!

I used to feel this way but having been through divorce and had a lot of my personal items, even clothes which he couldn't possibly wear, taken by the ex I now feel that anything I don't actually need is rather pointless. Yes, I do get times when I look at a Christmas item and think that I would like it and very occasionally I will buy, but only if I know it will come out every Christmas for ever after.

I would t describe this as unreasonable at all just wishful. Just because You know you can’t/shouldnt doesn’t mean it wouldn’t be lovely!

The thing is, wealthy people don't buy all the things. They know it's just tat.

what you could do is sell previous years stuff on Vinted. You’ll lose a bit a money but you’ll make some to buy new.

The things sound like tat, so I wouldn't want them. I'd rather have good quality things that will last, and things with memories attached.

Thinking of the conditions workers endure making these things puts me right off buying them.

OP, did you grow up deprived of these things?

I struggle to see why anyone would want to buy all the seasonal tat they see (and even wish to be wealthy to be able to afford it) unless they were hoping to fill some kind of emotional hole.