Worried sick in hospital with DS

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a week and a half ago my 8m old was eating toast in his high chair while I was sat infront of him watching him of course. He started to gag and was struggling with a big bit of toast that I could see at the back of his throat, it wouldn’t go down and it also wouldn’t come out. In a panic I pulled him out of his high chair to do back blows. It came to the front of his mouth I pulled it out all was good. When I pulled him out the high chair in a hurry his thigh got caught on the high chair tray. He didn’t cry so I thought nothing of it but noticed the bruise the next day. (It’s about the size of a 5p coin) DS was fine in himself so I didn’t seek medical attention.

fast forward to today DS had his 8m HV review and she noted down that he had a bruise and asked how, I told her and she said these things happen etc. later on she called me and said as he is non mobile (not walking yet) her boss has said she needs to call social services and refer us.

Around 9pm I get a call from emergency social services requesting I take him straight to a&e to have a top to toe check done by a consultant. I got to a&e and the dr said it’s tiny and no other marks he’s fine. Then sent the report to SS. SS then request we go to the ward and get signed of by a consultant on the ward before we can leave. Obviously midnight by now so no consultant available but the junior doctor checked him and said SS have reported ‘multiple marks on the body’ there’s not multiple. It’s just the one bruise. Dr noted down one small bruise and a little redness in anus area - he has that almost always as he’s on comfort milk so has wet poos. It’s not a rash as such but can be a little red if he’s pooed a few times in the day.

the Junior dr requested we stay here so the consultant can see my son and ‘relevant authorities’ decide what next. I am worried out of my mind. He’s never had any marks on him before and we have seen the GP multiple times through his life where they’ve stripped him down and they’ve seen nothing.

I suffer with PP anxiety as it is and I’m spiralling that SS think I’m some evil mother and would hurt my child purposely and they’ll take him away from me. Has anyone been through this? Please tell me everything was fine and we will go home soon with our lovely DS 😢

@Somuchgoo he was a whopper when born too - I had a c section🤣 because he’s so tall he doesn’t really look chubby , just so long😅 he was born at 60cm. My friends baby was born 2 weeks after and he was only just 41cm. My son looks like a toddler compared to hers. He’s a wide build like his dad. He’s like a mini version😆

I don’t think it’s an overreaction from SS, it’s an overreaction from the HV. I think as it has been escalated from health, SS are duty bound to investigate

Reading this really took me back to when I went through something similar when I was 19 and it traumatised me at the time. Like parent with a 1 year old and I relied on a mums group for support as was very lonely. Posted a picture one night as my son had come out in scratches and a rash. Few weeks later woken at midnight with a social worker and 2 police officers who demanded I strip my son naked and commented that he wasn’t very happy at being woken up because he was crying. I was absoloutely terrified I’d lose him. I had the advice I had to take him to a medical professional first thing to be checked and I then noticed my son had a small bruise on his leg.

The gp was dumbfounded and said he had eczema so had clearly been scratching at night and when I mentioned I was worried because he also had a bruise on his leg, the doctor commented in a baby starting to walk, he’d be more concerned if he didn’t have bruises. He also told me because of the cases with baby p etc, in his view social services were more overcautious because of the backlash they faced on missed abuse. Literally as soon as I’d had that consultation I had a phone call from social services closing the case, but my dad did also take me to the hospital with my son so we also had a second medical opinion.

im a nurse now and know from safeguarding training that any bruising in areas hard to bruise raise suspicion but I’ve never forgotten what a lonely terrifying time it was and it certainly made me more wary of what I asked online. I was young and felt judged at the time. I understand more now the safeguarding procedures but it’s still the most terrifying time in your life as a parent

Honestly, every time I read the latest serious case review I wonder just what the hell you'd have to do to make SS take action.

I think you'd be pretty unlucky if they separated you from your DS for a little nappy rash and a bruise, when you think of some of the injuries they've signed off on. I know I'm being unfair in saying this, but still.

my son also had a 99th centile head. I did not have a C Section 😭😭🤣

I'm really pleased to see this ordeal was already over by the time I read this OP. It must have been awful x

You can tell the Dr this when he or she comes round. You can even ask them to observe him moving around the floor and out it in his report that he’s early mobile.

Am sorry your going through this massive over reaction on social services part

Exactly this.

So glad everything is resolved now. What a worry for you though.

@itsgettingweird thanks the social worker see how he moves when she came and wrote it all in her report. She also had a chat with the dr before me about what she thinks etc. they were both super kind and understanding!