To ask how you find a fully remote job? Commute is killing me

[CharlieJaneJay]

I have 14 month old little girl and went back to work full-time when she was 9 months due to finances. We could’ve technically afford for me to drop to 4 days a week but it would’ve meant giving up investing money for her, and missing out of family days out etc and living off beans and toast so we decided I would go back full-time.

my job is okay, an entry-level customer service role. Most people’s idea of hell but I find the work okay. It is the commute that kills me. Our nursery is only a 2 minute walk from our house (literally) but then it’s a further 40 mins to get to work. I’m hybrid with 3 days in office 2 days at home. The home days are so lovely - wake up 7am, play and cuddle with DD, take our time with breakfast, get her to nursery at 8:45am and home and logged in 9am. Breaks and lunch I’ll clean, do the dishes, pick up toys etc. Log out at 5:30pm and by 6pm we’re all cosy at home and DD is eating her dinner.

Office days on the other hand I wake up 6am. Mad dash to have breakfast, get DD ready and at the nursery for 8am on the dot, then run carrying a massive backpack with a laptop in to get to the train which is 9/10 times late but getting an earlier one would mean having to drop DD off before the nursery even opens which is obviously impossible. If train doesn’t turn up then I get the bus which consistently leaves me 10 minutes late - today the bus stopped for 15 minutes because someone literally shat on the seat and the driver didn’t know what to do.

I leave work 17:30 pm and mostly don’t get home until 6:30 PM due to train/bus delays. Train was cancelled this evening, bus showed up but they had only a single decker which was full of people and I physically couldn’t fit on the bus. I got dirty looks from nursery staff when picking up DD late (I don’t blame them) and hit with late fees. To avoid late pick ups I’ve been paying for Ubers but no Uber driver picked up my request tonight.

My commute is destroying me, my Apple Watch actually sends me High Heart rate warnings on commute days (yes I have had it checked by a doctor and I’m healthy but the stress of the commute triggers high heart rate).

I know there’s plenty of other in-person jobs that may be a bit closer and accommodate nursery times better, but I love remote work so much. It broke my heart to go back full-time after maternity leave, but I feel with a fullyremote job I’d still get to enjoy mornings and evenings with DD which would soften the blow.

Could anyone with a fully remote job please advise what sector please? I don’t have a degree so it would need to be something realistic

On your office days, could you leave earlier? For me, leaving mid afternoon and finishing off at home means that my commute isn’t when the traffic isn’t as bad, I’ve ticked the box of office attendance to spend the time on Teams talking to people in other locations but have my head in the right space for the crazy at the end of the working day. Essentially I travel in my lunch hour.

Wow your childcare is cheap!

I manage to get three DC aged under 6 up, dressed, fed and out the door in an hour and a quarter- what on earth are you doing that’s taking two hours with one kid?

My job is fully remote, for a Charity and there are quite a few charities which also offer remote jobs. https://www.theworkfromhomehub.co.uk advertises loads of remote roles. Good luck!

Definitely put the request in - the worst thing they can say is no. I think 2 days per month in the office is a good option. Your DH could do the nursery run those days?
Also I work remote - some travel occasionally but like a few times per year for a night or two so not often. I work for a charity- check out charityjob.co.uk lots of charities have remote workers as they don't have the funds to pay for an office when one isn't needed. Good luck!

what have you got to lose then by asking? Even if they didn’t agree to fully remote, they might agree to 3 or 4 days from home, which would be a better quality of life than now?

I was fully remote for 5 years in a profession consultancy role, changed jobs and went back to hybrid this year

Some digital banks such as monzo are fully remote

try enterprise for fully wfh roles in customer service

Couple of things

1. Surely you do your WFH days when your DH is at work? That way it's only 2 difficult days?
2. You could ask to leave early and make up the time
3. Are you paying £75 a day childcare?? Because you say you lose £600 to childcare, which I assume is half (£1200) and your DH has her home with him, so £1200÷ 4 weeks is £300. £300÷4 is £75.

Has it really gone up that much lately?! That's crazy!? Could you get a childminder?

Eta, are you not eligible for tax free childcare?

My job is fully remote. I had an informal occasional WFH day when I first started but switched to 100% home based contract because of the commute. The trade off is that I work slightly longer days instead so they do get more hours out of me, but I can flex round life.

How about requesting shorter days in the office, and making up the time on the WFH days? I'd be requesting 2 days in office, say 09:30-1630; and 3 days WFH 08:30-1730, or similar, to make up how many hours a week you're contracted for. Yes, you'd have to be out earlier/home later than you are at present, on your WFH days, but it would take the sting out of the rushes on office days.
You could even say you're willing to review once your little one is a bit older.
I've approved similar for team members returning from Mat Leave.

Eta - just checked and it really is that expensive now 😱

Was this necessary?
It isn't a competition for who has the longest commute.

Definitely put the request in to wfh at your current place OP, worse they can say is no. I work for the NHS in a technical role and our whole department wfh 5 days a week on a permanent basis. I'd recommend trying to get into NHS IT if you can - even starting off on service desk to begin with as most trusts are in the process of moving their IT departments to remote work due to the need for clinical space.

I was going to suggest this page too. They have an active Facebook page too with lots of suggested jobs.

Get a bike, walk her to nursery then cycle on.

Lots of remote jobs in the charity sector. 100+ on this recruitment site.

https://www.charityjob.co.uk/jobs?Workplace=remote

Does your partner pick up on his day off, is his day off one of your office days? I would request flexible working.

I work for a charity and work mostly from home, in the office 2-3 times a month.

I work from home full time and worked for serco and G4s. Just check online for home based roles or specific companies who do work remote, like those above or insurance companies and mobile phone companies.

Ask to start later and finish earlier on office days so you still have a presence. Doesn't need to be significantly later/earlier but so you always get to nursery on time.
Then make up the couple of hours on your WFH days by starting earlier or working later.

I was going to suggest you pretend to be my kids father, he is that remote they haven't seen him in months haha

Joking aside I think you have it cushy because my commute is an hour each way in the car so no being able to crack on with work on a train or read to relax its just up school run drive work drive home but I guess each person is different. If you really feel you cannot afford to drop a day then all you can really do is ask for more flexibility and mention you are finding it hard and see what they say.

You still haven’t said why your husband can’t do a day if he works 4 days a week? Do you have specific days in the office. I can choose what days I do.

Unfortunately many of us in non office roles do this every single day with no opportunity to wfh. Of course it would be easier if we could all wfh but society wouldn't function.

Sorry, I know this doesn't answer your question, but to highlight those days at home do compensate a bit?

It was soooooo hard those early years, the daily drop off at nursery at 7.30am, hour commute, pick up at 6pm. DH would sometimes be away as well, so when he got a new job wfh 3 days a week it made life a bit easier.

No chance at all of cutting days so only wfh? It's hard when you're both working full time amd with careful planning you may discover it's doable. You can up your hours as I'm sure you will be valued where you work as you are clearly hardworking. Xxx

i work fully from home and work 4 days per week. I am very flexible about working extra or later though and nobody covers the day I don’t work so I pick that up too. My employer allows me a lot of flexibility, I’ve been here 4 years and it’s only been in the last 16 months that I’ve felt trusted enough to do this. I’m a PA supporting high level Partners who are also very understanding. My salary is very average for the amount of work I do but the flexibility means more to me.

There's quite a few websites aimed at those wanting fully remotenwork. Try workingfromhomehub, Flexa, Jungle or look on indeed and filter it by fully remote.
There's tons of customer service jobs that are fully remote in industries like banking, insurance, travel and energy sectors.