To think it’s okay to prioritise travel over settling down?

[RootlessButReady]

I’m in my 30s and honestly, I just want to see the world. I’m not in a rush to buy property, have kids or “settle down” in the traditional sense, and I feel like people find that threatening or flaky.

Whenever I say I’d rather spend my money on travel than save for a mortgage right now, I get the same looks or the same comments: “You can’t live like that forever.” “Don’t you want stability?” “But what about your future?”

I get it, security matters. But the world is huge and beautiful and fleeting. Why are we expected to postpone exploration until we’re retired or burnt out? What if seeing more of life is part of building a meaningful future?

AIBU to think that choosing travel, freedom and adventure now isn’t automatically immature or irresponsible, it’s just a different priority?

Do both?

It is your life, you can live it in any way that pleases you.

There are consequences though. It would probably be good to have a think about what you would like your old age to look like and make sure you aren’t unknowingly making decisions now that might limit you later.

It is a different priority. I get it. I did loads of travelling in my late 20s and early 30s and love nothing more than seeing the world. But if you do at some point want to have kids and/or own a house, you need to make plans for that to happen. I knew I wanted kids eventually so I stopped travelling to prioritise a relationship. I now have three kids and we all see the world together! If you don't want either of kids or home ownership in your future, crack on with your travelling for as long as you like!

But people will probably think you're insinuating that their choices are boring because many can't conceive of choices different from their own 😉 what about home ownership and pensions etc.

I agree OP, you do you.

Nothing wrong with that. Do it whilst you’re young and healthy.

In theory, sure! But in practice, travel and saving for a deposit don’t usually play nice together, especially with UK housing prices. I’d rather be intentional about one at a time.

Of course it's ok, as long as you understand that you may be sacrificing security and limiting options later. If you want children, for example, then that has a time limit. It becomes much harder to meet someone and settle down, if that's what you want, the older you get. But plane tickets and cruises are likely to be around a lot longer.

As another poster has said, think about what you want in ten years, when you want to retire and what that retirement should look like and then go from there.

I feel the same. Got absolutely flamed for voicing it a few years ago.

I think it's important to be realistic if you hope to "have it all" as there is a time limit on fertility. I don't see anything wrong with choosing travel over settling down and having a family, that's just a different preference.

You could get an international job. It makes saving and travel a lot easier.

Do it if that’s what you love! Have you got your own place you can rent out? Ideal if so as you’d have somewhere to come home to. You don’t want to arrive home totally skint either so lock some money away. Enjoy!

No nothing wrong with that at all!!! I agree - why should we wait until we retire?? I always thought the same thing but equally I also had a strong desire for children / family life and had a fear of infertility…. But you CAN still travel with a family so if you do decide you want children don’t let that put you off

Do it. Go travelling.
I went backpacking after Uni but one of my life regrets is that I didn't travel more before settling down.
I'm coming out the other side now and with my kids being a bit older I've booked a trip to Matchu Picchu for my 50th. I now want an ensuite private bedroom and not a bunk in a dorm though!

A lot of people are boring, unimaginative and just follow the typical 'life script'. There are no actual rules. You do you.

I started teaching EFL after finishing uni in my 20s and still doing in 30 years later. I haven't got a house or all the usual adult things but I make enough (generally) to live...and save and have had some amazing experiences. Could this be an option?

We did it the other way around. Kids, house and career while young and now we’re in our late thirties and have the freedom and funds to travel. There’s no right or wrong choice, so long as you are sensible with your health and future absolutely do what makes you happy! Enjoy!

I don’t think you have to rush to settle down but I think it’s pretty risky not to have any plans beyond travelling. How would you live if suddenly you couldn’t work because of ill health? And what will you do when you retire?

Nobody is going to live your life for you, so it doesn’t really matter what they think.

Sounds great.

How do you support yourself?

Is this your long term plan?

How do you see your life in 10 years?

I agree. There are often posts on MN from
women who want at least 2 kids and know they have low fertility waiting until their late 30s to try and get pregnant. You need to know what you want and be reality about trying to make that happen.

Do what you like and can afford but remember not to be resentful or jealous of people who make different choices and may have a more comfortable life when older.

As a fellow traveler, I agree with you.
Travel now, while you're healthy and while you can.
The world's changing so fast.
If you love to do it, and you can reasonably afford the time/cost, do it!

Don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. I was never a fan of roughing it, so DH and I spent 11 years childfree working corporate jobs but taking extra time off every year for longer trips. Felt like it scratched the itch without backpacking or hostels. I’m looking forward to the next chapter now but would be lying if I said I didn’t feel misty-eyed over those days already! Enjoy it x

Only thing I’d say is I know people who travel for long periods of time, come back skint to their parent’s home and get a fixed term job until they have enough money to be on their way again. Nothing wrong with that either but it makes it a bit difficult to stop travelling, as every time you come back, you’re starting from nothing without savings and a house deposit and your own place probably feels a bit unachievable? Good luck whatever you do x

I travelled a lot until my mid 20's
Then I got serious about life relationship/kids but still travelled, maybe twice a year, but built a pension pot and assets during that time to be able to retire early.
Retired at 53 and travelled since.
Your life, live it your way.

Two words: compounding interest

We had our dd start a retirement fund when she turned 15. Just a little saving every year early on makes a huge difference in the very long term. It’s hard to catch up later in life.

You can decide your priorities, just don’t forget that at some point you do need a plan for when you aren’t young and healthy.