Would you class this as flirting? DH with shop assistant

[Bex39]

DH is adamant I am being OTT and he was just being polite but I disagree. Please help settle this for me.

We were in a shop which sells chocolate and he was at the till with me next to him.

Shop assistant - those (the chocolates DH was buying) are my favourites

DH - I would eat so much chocolate if I worked here

SA - tell me about it, I can’t help myself with the samples

DH - you couldn’t tell by your figure

SA - you are being too kind

DH - seriously, you are in great ‘nick’

SA - laughs

That makes no sense to me. What does "they put it smell in gas" mean and what has it got to do with a chocolate shop anyway, or with flirting? 😕

Show us on the thread where the double standards are?

That 100% did not make her day. He does not understand women. He needs to read this thread.

no, but it's the many posters who make it a MAN problem, and it's always MEN who are sleazy. Back in the real world, it's people. Women are just as bad. Neither are acceptable.

My teen kid, who's still a kid let's be honest, is completely horrified by some of the behaviour. So am I, but not surprised.

Some people are just creep, it's not nice for anyone.

I was ready to say my husband always flirts in shops but it’s entirely harmless. But what your DH said is borderline sexual harassment and would have massively given me the ick - even just the first comment, never mind the doubling down!

Love advice on MN! Married man and woman being 'friends' and hanging out with members of the opposite sex together - no problem, absolutely the norm, everybody should do that, those who disagree are dinosaurs! Also MN - married man makes polite convo with a shop assistant in front of his wife - sleaze-ball, gross, inappropriate, wrong!

He would've been 4 years old then.

There’s nothing wrong with simply not commenting on a strangers body. Especially when they’re working and especially when it’s in front of their wife.

It's nothing to do with being from a different era. My dh is 60 and would never dream of treating a woman so disrespectfully.

I am also 60 and I must say, one of the advantages of getting older is that sleazy men no longer feel entitled to pass comment on my looks. Instead I see my poor daughter having this behaviour inflicted on her by the younger generation of sleazy men though.

Wow. Do you not see the difference between being friends with a woman- none of my male friends comment on my body btw- and perving on someone in her workplace?

Married man making polite conversation in shop is perfectly acceptable, as is having friends of the opposite sex. However this particular man was not making polite conversation. He was sleazing on the shop assistant and that is unacceptable.

How do you know it did not make her day we are not all the same.
I got told by a man yesterday he liked my jumper said it was very sparkly matched my ear rings. NGL it did make my day tbh.

I am not sure which part of MN you've been on, but it's often said that you absolutely cannot ever be friend with a male, that they only want one thing, they will ALWAYS try something and they are born abusive and that men are evil, who can't be trusted and are only here to abuse and destroy women😂

I shouldn't laugh, I have as many male friends as any normal human being, but more importantly I have boys, I do find that attitude revolting. Some women are VERY bitter on here.

I'm sure if you start a thread about women making inappropriate comments to your son you will get very similar answers to the ones gets.

Sleazing on anyone by anyone is inappropriate and unacceptable.

Those are not parts of your body though. Would you like unsolcited comments on how nicely your breasts fill out your jumper?

Look at the shop assistant's responses. Seems like textbook polite brushoff to me. But yes, I cannot 100% know. I will change it to 99.999%

So the man who thinks it's a compliment to comment on a random woman's body doesn't respect a woman's opinion? I could never have seen that coming.

I feel very sorry for the (presumably) young woman, having to put up with that whilst doing her job.

I'm not sure if it's flirting but he has a low opinion of women and of you.

Sorry, what?

Of course! How silly of me - your male friends talk in front of you just the way they talk between themselves or to their mates when you are not there. Silly me. Apologies.
P.S. Sorry, what is the added value of you as a female to their friendship? Are you a 4th-year running Carp fishing champion? Trout fishing? Maybe you are a prized car racer who gives excellent tips on how to switch an antique car from 2rd to 3rd without using a clutch just by listening to the revs?

Hardly comparable...

Being 54 is not from a bloody “different era!” I’m 42 and have plenty of friends who are late 40s, early 50s- they’re well aware this type of things just isn’t appropriate. Massive massive ick from me here!

Why do the women on this thread defending this man’s actions have such a poor grasp of grammar and written English? 🧐

This is a truly bizarre response.
I have no words really.

I don't think I know any men who know anything about any of those topics.

I have make friends. We get on because we have things in common and enjoy one another's company. Dh also has female friends. They get on for the same reasons.

Eww, def over friendly for a random woman serving in a shop, or any woman really!
Complimenting someone on their figure is not appropriate