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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Hate showering & washing my hair-Do you shower every day?

726 replies

Dontfeelchristmassyyet · 12/11/2025 15:27

Don’t know why I hate i?! Does anyone else?

I shower on working days (3 x per week) and if meeting up with friends etc, but if i’m off for a while, I don’t, is that gross? I could easily go a week if only doing school drop off and food shop, dog walks

OP posts:
CurtsyFriends · 12/11/2025 17:03

I try and wash my hair and have a shower every other day. It might be every 3 days. If I don’t have a shower and I have got dirty or sweaty then I will have a flannel wash if needs be.

I am like you though, I don’t particularly like it. Though to be fair it isn’t necessarily the shower or the hair washing I dislike, it’s the getting dry bit that I don’t like. It seems to take me ages to get dry properly and my hair is long and thick so takes ages to dry. For a year or so I had short hair and omg that was a revolution - I had a shower every day because it was so much easier to get dry afterwards. I don’t really like showering without getting my hair wet as it seems too stressful.

I also think that how convenient your shower is helps with enticing you to shower. At my old house I had an en-suite so it was easy. Now I have a bath upstairs which you have to sit down in to wash your hair as there is no screen or tiles high up on the wall and water goes everywhere unless you are extremely
careful and the main shower is downstairs. It doesn’t sound like much more effort, but when you don’t partially like showering it is an extra hurdle in the way. We are thinking of getting an en-suite shower put in. The main bedroom is a decent size so it should be possible.

OneBadKitty · 12/11/2025 17:04

I shower every morning and look forward to it. I buy luxury shower gel which smells really good and I enjoy the clean feeling afterwards. I'm not too keen on applying body lotion afterwards as it always feels cold and I have to force myself to do that bit but like moisturised skin so it's worth it.

Thebrink · 12/11/2025 17:04

I shower and wash my hair twice a week. On the other days I have a strip wash at the washbasin.
The reason I don't like showering is because I am severely sight impaired and physically disabled so am at risk of falling. Showering scares me even though I have a walk in shower, a seat and lots of handrails. I use an exercise bike in the morning before washing /showering. Apart from gentle chair exercises the only other exercise I get is slow walking locally to the shops or a stroll along a flat footpath. I don't believe I smell though.

Lieandcheerios · 12/11/2025 17:07

Pranksters · 12/11/2025 16:49

I shower every day, I hate not having had a shower. If I can’t, I at least do a pits and bits wash.

My in laws put deodorant on top of yesterday’s deodorant and they smell.

Edited

That’s known as “shower in a can”
round here.

XWKD · 12/11/2025 17:08

I don't mind showering, but I hate the drying part. The feel of the towels make my skin crawl. I wish I didn't have to dry my feet.

SheinIsShite · 12/11/2025 17:13

Shower every day but don't wash my hair every day. Since I hit menopause it doesn't need a daily wash. Every 2-3 days is plenty.

Muffsies · 12/11/2025 17:14

I shower everyday, but I have a very oily hair and skin type, I also cycle to work 15 mile round trip.

I did try showering every other day to save water. I still washed my face/pits/crotch, but my hair just felt awful on the non shower days, I never felt clean.

I don't have an oppinion on people who wash less frequently because we're all different. As long as you don't smell and you feel comfortable, I'm sure it's fine.

Jenkibuble · 12/11/2025 17:14

Dontfeelchristmassyyet · 12/11/2025 15:27

Don’t know why I hate i?! Does anyone else?

I shower on working days (3 x per week) and if meeting up with friends etc, but if i’m off for a while, I don’t, is that gross? I could easily go a week if only doing school drop off and food shop, dog walks

I have to wash everyday (body. Hair goes days without washing as can tie it back)
Even when camping I have to have a basic shower and despite putting dirty clothes (not underwear ) back on, I felt fresh going to bed and getting up each day.
Do you wash your 'bits' eg flannel and soap at the sink ? Or wet wipe clean ?

Zippedydodah · 12/11/2025 17:16

Bogfrog · 12/11/2025 16:10

Bath twice a day, wash hair every other day. Can’t imagine not cleaning myself every day

Nor me.
I can’t go to bed without a bath or shower and I have another shower in the morning, it only takes a few minutes.
I wash my hair twice a week.

RememberBeKindWithKaren · 12/11/2025 17:16

Ive said YANBU even though in a way it's a first world problem.

Showers I always enjoy when I can be arsed to take one, which isn't every day ( and folks can arrest me if that's bad).. I'm ok with the hair washing until the weather gets cold and then I hate it because it takes so long to dry my hair. I'm constantly thinking that I will have my haircut but I don't know what style would look okay with zero work on it in the morning. So I'm with you, Op. It's all a faff, especially in cold weather.

Daisy62 · 12/11/2025 17:16

Surely different people have different habits, preferences and constraints. There doesn’t have to be just one way. My grandparents had no indoor toilet, and just a kitchen sink and they didn’t smell. I grew up with a bath (used once or twice a week until I was a teenager, then more frequently) and no shower. Now that I have a shower and central heating, I shower daily and wash my dry hair once a week but am not bothered about what other people do.

rainbowsparkle28 · 12/11/2025 17:17

Yes shower every day (if not twice) as helps wake me up but also hate going to bed feeling yucky. But don’t wash hair everyday - maybe every 2/3 days depending on how it is, so most of the time doesn’t take long to nip in shower and feel so much nicer.

Crunchienuts · 12/11/2025 17:18

Yes I shower every day. My hair is disgusting if I don’t wash it every day. It’s really annoying. I know from living/holidaying with friends that not everyone gets so skanky overnight but I do!

NeverDropYourMooncup · 12/11/2025 17:19

Dontfeelchristmassyyet · 12/11/2025 16:17

Yes all of that feels a faff sometimes

That can be a symptom of neurodiversity, both ADHD and Autism (or AuDHD) - disruption to activities, transitions, sensory input, etc.

Acknowledging it is a 'thing' for you can make it easier to do because once you've accepted that it is probably better to shower more, whether for actual cleanliness or skin health itself, making a routine, social expectations, that once you're in the water it's nice, whatever, it can make it less of a bind to actually do it.

After a while, it becomes a more normal part of your day or self care and easier again, as feeling clean, being under the water, whatever scent or texture of soap/shampoo, removing dead skin and not providing a good home for infections, bacterial and fungal, is then your feeling 'right', or it could prime you for the most restful sleep/best start to the day, whichever feels right for you.

It's stretching out the timescale and they are very specific examples, but if, for example, your dog were to stand on your foot and scratch it with its claws, it might be fine - but without a regular routine of showering, what could happen is that you don't think anything of it and a serious infection takes hold.

The following are also possible scenarios that could happen without regular showering;

a) You could suddenly have an incredibly painful spot where an item of clothing has rubbed but it's got fungal colonisation and it splits and won't heal - or maybe turns into an ulcer.

b) Your scalp is suddenly burning because it's spread and hair starts coming out because your scalp is red raw and weeping.

c) Depending upon your age and lifestyle, it is common for people to develop T2 Diabetes - daily foot and skin care is absolutely vital and if you aren't already in a routine of looking after yourself, sometimes the first signs are when something's already gone very wrong, instead of 'hmm, my foot feels funny' or 'that blister's not healing/I didn't even know I had one, it's quite deep/am I supposed to see that white-yellow stuff at the bottom of it?'.

Or with regular showers;

a) You realise that actually, having a shower in the morning makes you feel less achy or sore when you hadn't noticed before that you do have some pain and discomfort in the morning.

b) You find you sleep better or wake up feeling better or when you're upset, angry, irritable or just plain fidgety and uncomfortable, it makes you feel calmer and patient with yourself.

c) Doing this thing for your benefit gives you 'permission' to do other things to look after yourself. It's not a faff to put yourself first then, meaning you might eat healthier, say no to things you really don't want to do, make choices that are right for you physically and emotionally.

These are just ideas and examples, not a 'Ewwwwwwwwwwww, you're disgusting and lazy'. It's very common for neurodiverse people in particular to find self care difficult and all too much of a hassle - but it can also apply to anybody neurotypical as well, especially if they're finding things difficult due to external circumstances causing them stress.

And yes, whilst you may not smell bad now, it's very easy to not really notice a crossover into less socially acceptable hygiene levels. And people don't like to say anything (well, outside MN, at any rate) until it's really becoming a problem.

Maybe just have a think about things and whether it could be better to increase the frequency to see if over time, it becomes more pleasurable/at least more tolerable or has other benefits. Because doing things that keep you healthy, well and comfortable are not a faff, they're what you should be allowing yourself to do as your right.

muddyford · 12/11/2025 17:19

I shower every morning and wash my hair. I like feeling fresh and clean.

GameOfJones · 12/11/2025 17:21

I shower every day but wash my hair every two or three days. I'm an evening showerer as I like getting into bed feeling fresh and clean.

Most of the time I do a two minute (max) shower. Hair tied up as I'm not washing it then a quick wash of face, neck, pits and bits. I am in and out of the shower, dried and pyjamas on in under 5 minutes.

Hair wash showers are obviously longer but day to day a quick shower probably takes less time than a flannel wash at the sink.

NeedWineNow · 12/11/2025 17:23

I shower every day and hair wash twice a week. I wouldn't feel right if I didn't.

Idontpostmuch · 12/11/2025 17:24

I'd probably shower every second day, except it's the easiest way to wash my hair, and I can't stand missing even one day with my hair. So every day shower.

KiwiFall · 12/11/2025 17:26

Shower and wash hair every day. Has to be morning unless on holiday then it’s end of the day before going out to eat.

peachie82 · 12/11/2025 17:27

Shower in the morning to wake me up and shower at night so I feel all clean to get into my pyjamas and bed. Couldn’t imagine facing the day without one or getting into bed with the days dirt on me.

ThatChristmasMug · 12/11/2025 17:30

I usually shower twice a day, MN will scream but quick shower first thing in the morning so I don't stink

shower before bed so I don't go to bed dirty

I don't wash my hair every day, but I don't have a schedule, depends what I've been doing and where I've been.

I don't know why you hate showers, I could spend 1 hour in mine, it's a time where I relax and I like hot water. There's no faff.

I wouldn't not brush my teeth, at least twice a day, same thing with showers, big deal.

tinytemper66 · 12/11/2025 17:31

Every day; sometimes twice. I have very short hair though!

Chinsupmeloves · 12/11/2025 17:33

Shower or bath every other day, wash hair twice a week. Xx

5hell · 12/11/2025 17:33

I like to skip the odd day (I think its probably good for our skin to leave it alone occasionally), and sometimes I cant be bothered getting naked, getting wet, getting dry, getting dressed etc

...but as other have said, often on MN it feels like if you dont shower twice day, and wash your towels at every use you are gross 😜I'm not sure what they would have made of all the "filthy" people in the 50s/60s/70s :)

Piamia7 · 12/11/2025 17:35

I hate it as well. I like being in the shower. Hate getting out.

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