But would you invite your MIL on your hen do?

[Rosienose]

Just that really I didn’t realise it was a thing.

you are being unreasonable - Yes you should

you are NOT being unreasonable - Perfectlg acceptable not to invite them

Why a ‘living’ MIL? Why specify that?

if that's what it comes from I am very impressed by the groom who is putting a stop to MIL from hell nonsense so very clearly!

I am guessing her running to the papers and making it such a drama is reason enough to ban her from the wedding, she sounds horrendous. And that's only the hen, they are not even married.

What a cow 😂(IF the story is actually true, I would take DM reports with a huge pinch of salt)

😂😂😂

I dont' want to be offensive, so I won't comment, but it's one of the few posts that genuinely made me laugh. I can picture it 😂

If i had one yes but no I think people have to in general

I wouldn't and didn't have a hen do but I doubt Mil would have appreciated it any more than I would.

I invited MIL and DM for lunch when everyone arrived - and then they left!!! Perfect :-)

The scene in Psycho? Like cmon I'll give you a hand Mil now it's time to dance.

I've been married donkeys years but It honestly never occurred to me to invite my mum and/or MIL to my hen. I don't think either of them would have wanted to come either. My mum is very sour faced about drinking and stuff like that, I can just imagine her sitting there in silent judgement.

I can only remember going on one hen where the brides mother (not mil) attended. She was very young at heart, party girl type. Brides gay brother was also an honorary attendee and he was a laugh too.

My sister went on her workmates hen and the brides mother was there and got really drunk and was sick under the table in Pizza Hut. Oh dear.

Doesn't depend on anything. Have never heard of this happening but it is entirely 100% your choice. She'd have to be quite nuts or very entitled to expect it.

If you don't want to, that's the end of it.

The last thing in the world I ever wanted was a hen party, but the best hen dos I have been to/accepted invites included the bride & grooms mums as they were an afternoon tea or meal out rather than a dick themed drink fest.

I think they could have done the hen party with no media and then invited MIL to an afternoon tea with her mum and others.

Seems mean imo to single her out completely but then again I don't know what the relationship is like behind closed doors.

Thing is it shouldn’t matter if the bride invited her mum it’s her party for her female friends and family.

Just as it’s upto the stag who he invites. His friends and family.

Just like I believe bridesmaids should be picked by the bride. Groomsmen/women should be picked by the groom.

If you want an invite to these things you need to have a genuine relationship with the party person where they feel comfortable and at ease with you. Not on show.

It’s so dependent on the individuals involved that there’s no ‘right’ answer!
For example, my mum and MIL were not invited to my hen do because it was a sporting outdoor activity and a ‘big’ night out which is their idea of hell 🤣 They were both over 65 when I got married. I went for afternoon tea with them instead.
My bestie invited her MIL on her hen - her MIL is only 18 years older than us so was only in her mid/late 40’s and still very up for a big night out. Bestie did a spa day with her mum and less party inclined relatives.

I was invited to both my DILs hen parties. The first was a quietish one because granny who was invited was terminally ill

The second was in a city I knew it would be a different kind of night so declined.

It was lovely to be asked though.

No way (though love her to bits!) and no to my own mother as well!

If you invited the soon to be father in law to the stag do then yes.

Surely that’s relationship dependant.

Rather than well stag invited her dad so she must invite his mum.

Of course not, why? They're completely separate event and occasions - it's not the wedding.

My hen do was my closest female supporters, as it were. It never occurred to me to invite mil. It was my two female best friends plus my mum. And the friends arranged it and invited my mum. It was a genuinely brilliant time. Adding some person I barely knew would not have helped.

I’d invite mine, even though we’ve had problems in the past.
She’s got a good sense of humour and likes a dance.

That said I’d maybe have a separate night out for friends.

I didn’t for my first marriage as it was a drunken night out, but my second marriage earlier this year I did as it was lunch with my friends following my final dress fitting. Like everyone says, it depends on the occasion and your relationship with her.

Gosh, I don’t think I know of one who was. I mean, hens are for the bride’s friends and family.

Sometimes I’ve known people who’ve had a separate mini hen that included their MIL, maybe SILs, older aunts etc.

I did. She was a great laugh.
Depends on your relationship though. Mine adores me and my friends and we regularly go for drinks.

I had two hen dos- home and abroad (it was a tightly budgeted affair for the very closest of friends!) mum and mother-in-law came to both and it was lovely to celebrate with them.

I like the point a pp made about women who uplift us- they both do that for me. I can understand it could be very different for other people though, I've been with DH since we were 16 though, so mil's seen me grow up.

I invited my mil to mine. As it turned out, she couldn't come. She had to have surgery at the last minute. We couldn't postpone my hen do so went ahead without her with her blessing.
I also involved her with the wedding preparations. We spent several evenings together making the table decorations and favours. She only has sons so it felt the right thing to do.