Husband's vinyl record shelves- should he pay for them or should we split cost?

[sunflowers365]

My husband and I have moved into a new house. He has a huuuuge collection of vinyl records and he needs to store them somehow. We have got a joiner to do a floor to ceiling inbuilt shelving unit so they can be stored safely and fully and, as you can imagine, it's not cheap. AIBU that he should pay for it all, or should the cost be split as we share a house?

You don't just share a house, if the relationship was housemates that would be different.
You are actually married, I can't imagine not sharing the cost of anything in the house with my husband or vice versa.

Do you have very different incomes? Otherwise I can’t imagine living like this.

Ha I went through something similar with my ex husband - I made him pay for it entirely.

Did you husband make you buy your own wardrobe for your clothes?

It’s just an expense needed for the house imo, but different couples manage finance differently

Assuming you have split finances and roughly equal salaries (or you're on significantly less), I'd say he pays more, e.g 75%. If joint money id say it should be joint.

We do our finances as joint with a separate equal discretionary amount to spend on hobbies etc each month. Smaller things like DH guitar stands came out of that, but I wouldn't expect him to pay for the whole unit himself as that would wipe him out.

Our home is furnished and decorated for how we both want it. We have the big TV DH wanted, the bathroom with the fixtures I wanted, the fancy tap for the kitchen I wanted, the sofa DH wanted etc.

Surely that's a house expense. You sound extremely petty.

Do you each buy your own toilet paper?

Why are you married?

As someone with a DP who also comes with a large record collection, YANBU. It's the equivalent of going halves on a bike if his hobby was cycling, it just happens to be something that's stuck to the wall! I've never been asked to pay anything towards my DP's record storage, and I know he wouldn't expect me to.

I can't really answer your question as to who should pay for them - nor can any other strangers on the internet - you need to discuss between you like the married adults you are and come up with a solution.

I did decide to answer here as fitted shelving from a joiner would be amongst the more expensive options. If he's handy, could he build something himself? Otherwise, Ikea's KALLAX series are simple, pretty decently well-made, and are exactly the right size for storing vinyl records. They're inexpensive, modular so you could get plenty of them to fit a space, stack them, arrange in whatever layout you like, vary colours etc. They're a very common option for people storing large numbers of records.

What a way to live!! My husband eats approximately 25% more than me - should he pay for the fridge and associated running costs? I never use the microwave, should I send him an invoice? I have a lot more clothes and toiletries than him, should I pay more for that storage? His shoes are bigger than mine and take up more space in the shoe rack, although I have more shoes - on balance I think that purchase is acceptable.

@Mufflette

i agree - it’s hobby based. Does all other posters who think she is being unreasonable pay towards their other half’s hobbies?

my ex husbands hobby was collecting vinyl - a properly built in bespoke shelving system due to the weight of vinyl can be several thousand pounds in cost

I'm guessing he's not always happy to pitch in when the cost is incurred by you in the home?

If yes, what's sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander and tell him to pay for them himself.

Irrelevant.

Will he then expect you to pay for everything that is mainly used by you? Eg pay for a wardrobe but not a dressing table- that’s just for your use etc. That’s if he is as petty as you, of course

Dangerous road to go down @sunflowers365. Are you going to go through every item, every piece of work needing done, every thing, and decide if one or both use it before agreeing to pay?

Yes we pay for each other’s hobbies. We don’t have his/hers money, everything is joint. He needed a new bike, so bought one. I needed a new ski jacket, so bought one. It wouldn’t make a difference what it was, we had a similar approach to money. I can’t imagine nitpicking over who has more of what.

I think a bespoke shelving system for a huge vinyl collection costing several thousands is different to a dressing table.

If he wanted a desk for himself, I doubt OP would quibble.

I cannot imaging being married to a man, sharing a bed, having sex with him to them quibble over the bloody cost of a shelf!

A better analogy would be if her DH wanted to trade in his car for a fancy car costing several thousands more, should OP fund that too? Especially when she doesn't get a fancy new car?

It's not a shelf.

It depends on your financial set up surely. If you split bills 50/50 or such like and have your own seperate money after then it seems like this is for him to pay however, dp and I just throw all our money in the same pot so it'd be a joint cost.

Ok a number of shelves

For us, it would be a household expense. We don't split finances.