To be a bit sad I’ve never received a Christmas stocking?

[Jumpeduppantry]

I know, very much a minor thing in the grand scheme and all that. But I grew up in a very isolated family (no grandparents, aunts, uncles or cousins) and parents with very firm ideas about the importance of not spoiling children.
We were never told about Santa (as in, being given to believe in it), never had Christmas stockings, very limited presents that were never wrapped (wasteful), not allowed a selection box (too indulgent) or annuals (considered unsuitable).
We did get presents, but always limited and very sensible. I appreciate that plenty of kids receive worse but it always seemed a bit miserable especially when I got older and realised what friends experience was like. Looking back now it just feels such a shame and sad that this was a choice, not anything about affordability.
I have tried to do things very differently with my kids, not OTT but making Christmas fun and sparkly (and Santa came to our house when the kids were little). I still do stockings for them even now they’re adults (which I think they like).
It just struck me as a little sad that I’ve never had a stocking for me.
I need to get a grip, obviously!

My MIL was rather startled the first time she got a stocking on Christmas Day when staying with us but I’m a big fan of them and don’t see why adults shouldn’t have small joys.

I also had never had a stocking until I met DH, we do one for each other every year

So sorry to hear that. I think you are absolutely allowed to feel sad.

Definitely ask your adult children for one this year. My teenagers do one for me and their Dad instead of a present bigger present and it is the best bit of Christmas. Nothing extravagant or wasteful (think things like mug, book, puzzle. chocolate, socks). I encourage them to go to charity and local shops. They put loads of thought into what we would really like and I love it for all the thought and care. Given the background I bet your children would love to do the same for you.

I reckon you could sort out a stocking and get things you will enjoy ,some lovely chocolates ,a favourite new book by an author you like ,some bath things maybe a lovely bubble bath pack .Like others have commented I am sure if we knew you we would sort out a stocking. Why not sort it and then tell us what you put in it and the rest of us could list what we would want in our ideal stocking. I would want a luxury hot chocolate pack.

I don't do stockings for my children, I don't really see the point in them

Apparently when I was little I said to my Mum, I will drag my Christmas stocking in to show you as I expect it to be full of lovely things. A friend of mine had a letter saying she wanted surprises and my aunty asked me to find out exactly what she was expecting so those things could be bought but all she kept saying was she looked forward to unwrapping her surprises and then was disappointed as her stocking was not full of the things she wanted. As a confirmed chocaholic my favourite gift is still a chocolate selection pack and not one with any toffee things in like curly wurley. I think the best tin is Marks and Spencer's Big Mix as they don't have many toffee ones and it is far better than quality street or rose's even.

It's for putting small treat gifts in.
That's the point of them.

Do one with your partner.
I still do a stocking for my husband he is nearly 60

Well yes, but they don't do that, do they? I meant so that she gets what she wants, but it's just to start them off - they're supposed to add to it. I buy stuff for myself and hand it over to DD early in December - I've forgotten everything I've bought by the time Christmas comes and so it's still a surprise!

It’s not minor. My mum used to make stockings for me and my brother still until we were well into our 20’s. As we became older teenagers we started helping our dad by contributing stocking gifts for our mum, felt like the least we could do with all the work she put into making everyone else’s. Now we make stockings for our own young kids but we don’t do them for the grown ups in the family any more. My mum gets to relax, but I think she misses it a little! I think now though we all have more than enough “stuff” and we used to spend so much of Christmas Day opening presents - now we focus on eating and playing games. But I think if I’d never had a stocking I’d feel very differently.

Do your kids know this? Perhaps you could gently nudge them that now they are adults they could get involved in making a stocking for you, too? Could be a lovely thing to all open together on Christmas morning before breakfast

@Jumpeduppantry you are not even a tiny bit unreasonable. I sort of do my own stocking now, since dh’s idea of going to the pound shop on Christmas Eve, didn’t really cut my mustard.
I’ve already started and I honestly can’t remember what I’ve got! Get one of your children to wrap it for you, I use tissue paper, and don’t bother with sellotape. And maybe next year tell them that’s what you would like.
And give child you a really big cuddle and tell her it all worked out in the end.

Bless you OP, I hope you get your stocking this year ❤

I live alone so bought my own stocking with my name on and fill it myself but sounds to me like you want the thoughtfulness of someone putting you one together. Definitely mention to your kids!

In 2020 because the year had been so naff I put my Mum together a Christmas Eve Box which has since become a tradition. I'm sure your own kids would be happy to put you a stocking together! Hope you have a lovely Christmas.

I do one for my sister and she does one for me, because for years we'd done them for our dc but not had one ourselves. We put decent stuff in though, not tat!

I feel for you @Jumpeduppantry, we had fairly miserable Christmases as kids so our response has been to make it really nice and fun-filled for our own children. I do get joy from making it a happy occasion for them, because we know how rubbish it can be if the feeling just isn't there. Even if there's presents, without the attempt to be jolly and cheerful it's just not special or magical...

I think it would be ok to ask your partner to do you one, even if you don't think he would enjoy it. I'm sure he loves you, he wants to make you happy, and it is not a big ask. If he wants to make it tat-free then he's giving himself an extra challenge but it's not impossible.

I get the impression you are one of those people who is comfortable helping others but terrible at asking for help. It's ok to ask for a favour, even something that you don't think the person will enjoy doing. I think you should ask him to do it, and maybe let your adult children know that he might call them in to consult! If they end up running it, so be it.

Those items aren't tat though, they're decent stuff!

@ShodAndShadySenators it should have been do not need tat!!!!! Sorry butterfingers here!

I'm sorry. Also never had a stocking, annual etc. and mostly very useful presents, but we did have a selection box each and there was always a (homemade from wire and tinsel) Christmas tree. But our parents were hard up and I think we have forgotten how very much closer to post war conditions 60s childhoods were. Houses were single glazed, cold, and people owned much less 'stuff' altogether.

I think that might have been a typo and should have said "don't" 🤔
Edit: just saw the correction 🙂

Gosh, I feel you, I love a stocking as do my DCs and we actually make them very personal and funny. When the kids were really little (they’re teens now) I think my DH thought I’d lost the plot with them, now he’s very onboard! To be honest I do pop things to one side for mine if I see something I like, ie special chocolate bars from M&S, jewellery from Oliver Bonas in the summer sale and I’ve usually forgotten about what I’ve stashed away!
Please ask your DCs to put you one together, I think they’d love it!

Wow, this is brand new information.

Well if your stockings are full of "pointless cheap tat" and you're not the one putting it there....who is?

What are you talking about? Try reading my post again.

Sorry but unless I've muddled you up with someone else on the thread you said you "didn't see the point because they're just full of pointless cheap tat".
But they'll only be full of that if you (or your partner if you have one) put it there.
Apologies if that wasn't you.

OP can I make a suggestion that my single friend does that I think is genius?
In the sales, or up until March, she buys herself little gifts, wraps them in christmas paper and puts them in her velvet stocking. By the time it gets to Christmas, she's forgotten everything she bought herself. She really treats herself ( she does set a budget but it's a healthy one) close to Christmas, she buys herself her favourite posh chocs from an indeoendent chocolate shop in our town.
I think this is absolutely brilliant and our friends in partners all want to start doing it as none of their partners are good at presents!

"I'm still not entirely sure what the point of them is and they seem to be mostly filled with pointless cheap tat."

Not because. I don't see the point of putting tat or non-tat in a stocking instead of under a tree, to be clear.