Having sex straight after baby

[hummous123]

I don't understand those who can be arsed.

Aibu

Edit - I don't mean straight away but generally. So tired, house is a rip, fat belly, body is tired, mind is tired. I just don't care if I don't have sex again

I don't understand those who can be arsed.

Well, good for you 🙄

This. It's a bit vague

Of course.

My bit - I never had kids, never been that much into sex. This made me a bit queasy.

I should have quoted @AintNoPunshineWhenShesGone and @TheTaupeMoosefor their comments re why @hummous123is even starting a thread about it.
I couldn’t give a shit when a woman feels ready for sex after giving birth but I thought their comments were unnecessary and ‘cool’. Hence stating they should just scroll on by.

bit intrigued you have been bothered to waste time making a reply then!

I had a c section. I think my midwife told me - give it 6 weeks ! DH dutifully stayed away for those 6 weeks then maybe we had sex once a fortnight until about 6 months . I wouldn’t have bothered if we hadn’t had sex . By 9 months I was feeling good and got a positive pregnancy test when DD was 11 months !!!!

after second and another c section , it look me a good 12 months to feel sexy ! Probably has sex after 6 weeks again but fortnightly.

Children now 2 and 4 and I’m just feeling my old self again re sex. Xxxxxx this is such a hard time . Your exhausted. My dream was sleep not sex.

We stopped having sex when I was about five months pregnant as I just didn’t feel like it, lost my sex drive completely.
Two weeks after a c section, I started to feel so horny but was still bleeding. When it has stopped after three and a half weeks, I couldn’t WAIT to have sex. Christ that first sex was good.

Is that okay?

I do think some women are pushed into having sex before they want to or before they should. I remember my late FIL,who was Irish, hated the term “Irish twins” because he felt that it was insulting to Irish men, suggesting that they didn’t wait as long as they should.

I voted YABU because I don't get what you're responding to. No one's making you do it. If they were, that would be a problem, but then if someone makes another person have sex at any time they don't want it, that's a problem. If both people want it, that's fine. Though I've never personally come across anyone who wants it straight after having a baby and I'd assume those folk are fairly rare. But if they can be arsed, then fair play to them. None of our business!

How soon is straight after? Days or weeks?

A long as the woman feels ready/physically enough and isn't doing it because of pressure from a selfish sex pest partner, fine I suppose.

Personally I was exhausted from night feeds and any moment I got to spend in bed I wanted to be asleep! Even when I was getting more sleep I didn't really fancy it until I had stopped breastfeeding as I was so touched out. But I'm not everyone.

Such a misleading thread title...women die from air embolism etc...if they don't wait several weeks as advised by their DOCTORS 🤦‍♀️
What a low and unpleasant post OP

Everyone is different...your experience is not universal.

Except you couldn't have quoted me asking why the OP has started a thread about it, because I didn't ask?

Quite simply, the OP doesn't understand why some people do some things differently to other people.

And my point is, she doesn't need to understand other people's sex lives being different to her own.

Do you know what obsessive means?

I think she was maybe asking why people would ignore medical advice?

I was so sore and bruised that when I went for my 6 week check up the GP said I looked as if I had just given birth and to re-book after another month had passed. Ended up having to be referred to hospital as I was so slow to heal. Meanwhile my poor sex deprived husband had started shagging another woman.

Everyone is different.

For some women it makes them feel good.
Orgasms can do wonders for your body.

But for lots of women, their bodies go into healing mode and they’re put off it for a while.

I know a few women who had sex straight away and they all ended up pregnant - so having 2 within the same year.

If a woman wants sex right after birth I would advise protection.

No chance, waited until I’d healed, wanted a date night, shower, massage, film & wine. You have to be careful so it’s all about you.

I have a theory that so many men are useless and a second child when baby comes home that they become completely undesirable. If you are lucky enough to have a partner who loves and cares for you and baby then by all means you will bond further and be ready to jump his bones

• so long as you aren't traumatized by the birth, unwell, getting no sleep, post surgery and a whole host of other good reasons not too. There's a reason why they say eight weeks before sex.

I think if both partners are hands on with the baby they’re probably a bit too tired in the early days to have an appetite. From a health perspective absolutely waited a few months till things healed and went back to normal.

Jesus no. My bits were shredded each time.

I’m so sorry x he should have been helping you heal and rest x

I think we waited at least 2 months as I had loads of stitches and I couldn’t be bothered anyway

None of the things you edited in the OP applied to me so obviously I felt differently to you but of course yanbu everyone is different.

It's a womans choice if she wants to straight away or not. I had sections so no, wasn't happening,
Those that do, maybe some of them have scummy h /p's who will be sniffing around else where if they don't have sex with their men. That is really sad if the bar is that low.