How much value do you place on being able to pick your kids up from school?

[youdrive85]

Weighing a couple of job options up. DC starting school in September. How much value do you place on being able to do pick ups at 3ish (and how many times a week) vs after school club etc.

For me it was very important and I didn’t use after school clubs, I have friends for whom it isn’t important and they use full wrap around care. It’s a personal choice. We all have happy and loved children.

What do you want? It’s a privilege to have a choice. Make the most of it.

For me, drop off and pick up are important and I am fortunate enough to work hours that facilitate both.

I would say if I had to choose 1 I would chose pick up. Most of the parents at DDs school do pick up 2-3 times a week. I find the school gate more social at pick up.

For me it was important as the children were worn out at 3 pm.
At secondary school they travel home on their own.

Mixed. Mine were in after school till 5 which was a nightmare with them doing homework and after school events.

Get a balance. So a few days of being late is grand and a few days of getting at pick up.

And good luck for the school mums....

Personally prefer after school and breakfast club. Dc have fun. I avoid the school gate shit. Most at my dc school are bringing dc home to screen time whilst they work. Plenty do after school activities but a lot of it is unnecessary busy-ness, especially for young dc.

We fitted in a full after school programme (swimming, scouts, football fencing) plus music lessons in school.

Reception- I wanted to pick them up.

After that, they loved after-school club - very chilled out wind-down time with toys and crafts - great to have that option.

That was only 2 or 3 days but the variety worked well.

I work 3 days and really love picking my kids up from school. I think it's really important as that's when you get a sense of how their day was and any issues that may have arose. Even as teenagers I think it's important that someone is there is possible, at least for a couple of days.

We tried not to put my DS in after school club thinking it would be better for him but he kept asking to go, he now goes three days a week and would love to go five days a week. He sees it as time to play with his friends and have fun

I think its good to do pick ups at least 3 days a week. My DH does 3 drop offs per week. I do 2 drop offs and 3 pick ups. My MIL does 1 pick up and they go to after school 1 day per week. This allows for after school extra curriculars, play dates and after school park trips

What hours does your child do at nursery now? If they are used to being in full time, 5 days a week 8-6 then maybe it’s not that important. If you’ve had them at home Al these 5 years or they’ve only done short days, putting them in wrap around care is going to be exhausting. Also depends on the child. I do 2 days wrap around, and pick up the other 3. I’ve loved the chance to make friends/ socialise/ build networks and wouldn’t replace these interactions, I love my school mum friends. But I’m lucky it’s been a nice school and there isn’t any gossip or drama like you read about on here. Plus my dc would have been utterly exhausted, and struggled to fit in phonics/ reading etc.

I think it depends on the child. I really value pick up as get to hear all about their day.

Indeed
I worked full time so wasn't a choice

Mine tell me about their day after they've been in after-school club too! It's not either/or!

They also like nattering to the ASC staff - they're like substitute aunts/teachers/cool older cousins.

It's very important. I took a job that allowed it although financially it's been hard. It's a price I was prepared to take but not everyone can do it so no one ever judge you. It's more important your child has food and a safe place to live

The difficulty is mainly homework if ASC doesn't do any of it with them - if it is a school with homework every night it is much more challenging to get it done in a shorter evening.

I felt pick up was important as that was when they were most likely to tell you about their day as it was fresh in their minds.

Being able to do school pick-up at least once a week is definitely beneficial.

• it means you are seeing their teacher face to face which usually provides for a better relationship than a being a parent they never see.

• you will see other parents and your children's friends, which again promotes a better relationship than being a Mum that no-one knows/has ever met.

• it provides an opportunity for your child to come home early and chill out, this will likely be much needed when they first start (particularly during the cold/flu season where they're likely to be under the weather a lot).

• it gives you an opportunity to spend some weekday time with your child that isn't first thing in the morning (stressing to get to work/school) or last thing in the evening (stressing to get dinner and to bed because everyone is tired).

• it allows for playdates, park trips and out of school activities that they may want to do.

Its important for us, we both work three days a week so we usually only need after school club once a week for our daughter. Our son usually takes himself to the park, if the weathers bad he either opts to go to after school club or he’ll message us asking to walk home with him. He has always really enjoyed after school club, to the point that when his sister came along he kept going as he missed it when we didn’t use it due to lack of need.

I pick my kids up every day. It is important to me, but also, the cost of ASC is quite high where we live, so even if I worked longer hours, we wouldn't be much better off overall. So definitely worth it for me.

I've dropped to 22hrs per week so that DD1 only needs ASC 2x per week. She's a young reception (June birthday) and i was worried about how tired she would be if she had ASC 5x per week. School is also much further away than nursery was (20mins walk vs 3mins walk!) so i knew she would find the adjustment hard. We are fortunate enough finance wise that we could take the hit on our household income but i have found the drop in income to be an adjustment. It has worked well though and it also means we get some 1:1 time together as we dont go and collect DD2 from nursery until 5ish.

I think it is helpful to do one or two a week - makes it possible to do a playdate or fit in swimming lessons/other stuff

But it isn't a big deal IMO. (Sadly) my children are not exhausted by school at all and so they don't need to come home and "chill", they would rather run around at after school club, they have made loads of friends in different years, it's kinda like playing out really

It's so much better for younger kids to be picked up when the school day ends. If I had the choice one of us would do pick up at 3 every day but our hours aren't flexible at all, no WFH and I have to work three days a week so DC are in after school club until at least 5 on those days. We are all knackered by the weekend.
The main reason I don't increase my hours is to be able to give DC at least two shorter school days a week.

It depends on what exactly you’re talking about. If it’s 4pm at school gate (so finishing at 3-3:30) vs 6pm (so finishing at 5-5:30), that alone is already 25% less working time. Realistically the salary will drop even more as usually full time salary is proportionately higher than part time.

But yes, I value it a lot and have switched jobs in order to have more time with my children. It’s a very personal decision which depends on your circumstances and also on arrangements with your partner.

Reception and Y1 I worked 5 short days, Y2 onwards I did 3 full days and 2 short days (and still do he's 17 lol). He did breakfast club 3 days and ASC 2 days and my mum picked him up one day

My child goes to ASC with all
their friends. Their grandmother often wants to pick them up from school and they hate it.