What would have been a sharp reply to this?

[2cubesoficeandasliceoflime]

I've lived all over the UK and have a fairly neutral accent which some people interpret as posh (it isn't) but sometimes I use colloquialisms that people dont expect because of it.

I was organising some food. I had referred to it as the "evening meal" just because that was what the menu said. I was speaking to one of the delegates that I dont know and said about having "tea". He looked down his nose at me and said "do you mean dinner? Tea is something you drink". This was in front of quite a lot of people and some sniggered. I just muttered something about the evening meal.

Ive a feeling this wont be the only time Ill experience this about how I talk so what would have have been a sharp but professional reply? Im not the quickest at retorts and when Im put on the spot like that I stumble over my words.

A tinkly laugh/did you mean to be so rude etc aren't particularly sharp.

Im not going to change how I talk. I shouldnt have to. He knew exactly what I was talking about and was just trying (and succeeding) in embarassing me. I can see that certain words/phrases might need to be explained.

This isnt meant to be a discussion about why "dinner" is correct.

(BTW I also use toilet and HATE loo and will never use it).

<eye contact> it's tea where I'm from/in my house <hold eye contact, don't smile>

"Dont be an arsehole, Dave".

He sounds like a right arse and the people who laughed are no better.
If I'd have been one of them I'd have said, "Deary me Terry, don't be such an arse". I think he'd lost the right to professionalism when he acted like a pillock.

"do you mean dinner? Tea is something you drink".
"No, I mean tea. You might drink tea dear, but I prefer champagne."

A loud tut, an eye roll and a walk away is probably the best solution.

@MorningFresh Oops bit of a cross post there. Sorry.

You could just say 'depends on situation, but where I'm from people often call it tea'

‘Oh you’re one of those - people who can only feel good when putting others down. I’m glad I found out early’

Without smiling, just say “thank you for correcting me” use a slightly louder and firmer voice.

Is this at work/with colleagues? If so, you handled it fine. No point being sharp with colleagues as that could turn into a complaint being made about you? You de-escalated.

Also sometimes with colleagues, it helps to point out the obvious, so if the majority of delegates understand “dinner” vs “tea”, just go with “dinner” to avoid misunderstandings. Plenty of people need their hand held at work, this is no exception.

Ultimately, just chalk it down to him being confused about why Tea is on the evening meal menu because he uses different terms and he immediately thought of the drink. He didn’t approach it in a totally friendly manner but I’d attribute that to him being dumb vs you doing anything wrong. Maybe even send out an updated menu and add a joking reference that you clarified it is “dinner”. Play into it and make him not know he bothered you.

In a group setting op would come across worse for saying this

I like the first one. In my house it’s tea.

Perfect

I smirk lips pursed pitying look on my face with a slight nod/ tilt and say Ok (slow drawn out) and walk away!

tea / dinner / supper ..... its food mate, in the evening

And this kind of reasoning is why there are hundreds of women on here being treated terribly by people all the time.

Funnily enough no one tries shit like this with me more than once and I have more friends than I can keep up with.

“Ok, a lot of people call the evening meal tea” said in a totally casual voice, as though you’re informing him of a detail he might not have known. Treat it like the pointless interruption that it was and then carry on. No need to be insulted or embarrassed.

Why are you embarrassed OP?

Not where I'm from. You don't get up North much do you. Pity, it's a great place with really warm and friendly people.

I agree with Pp saying you have to be careful about being too sharp in a work situation.
I think I’d have gone with:

”I call it tea, we’re all different”

or “it’s interesting how words vary between regions isn’t it?”

Let him know he’s being a bit of a tit for looking down on something so trivial and subjective.

Oh it's tea where I'm from! and shrug or laugh.
Just act unaffected by it, like his comment wasn't important is the best way I've found of dealing with people like this.

Apologies - I forget other people don’t understand regional differences. I didn’t mean to make you feel inferior for not understanding - I would never do something like that.

He showed himself up. There is no need for you to stoop to his level to amplify his arseholery. He can sacrifice his dignity for the gratification of amusing a few other arseholes but you can choose to hold on to yours. If it helps I would have just felt pity for him. Confident, happy and secure people never feel the need to try to publicly humiliated others.

I think this from Desmondhasabarrow at 9.48 is perfect.

“Ok, a lot of people call the evening meal tea”

Just say "Don't be a dick" and keep talking.

Or you could just give him a Paddington hard stare for a bit and then continue talking.

"Well, far from embarrassing me, you've just made yourself look like a right snob, you daft wassack."

Lean into it, OP. If you're from the North, own it! And fuck 'em 😚

Maybe say,” Thank you Professor Higgins”

Its also the last letter of see you next tuesday