What would have been a sharp reply to this?

[2cubesoficeandasliceoflime]

I've lived all over the UK and have a fairly neutral accent which some people interpret as posh (it isn't) but sometimes I use colloquialisms that people dont expect because of it.

I was organising some food. I had referred to it as the "evening meal" just because that was what the menu said. I was speaking to one of the delegates that I dont know and said about having "tea". He looked down his nose at me and said "do you mean dinner? Tea is something you drink". This was in front of quite a lot of people and some sniggered. I just muttered something about the evening meal.

Ive a feeling this wont be the only time Ill experience this about how I talk so what would have have been a sharp but professional reply? Im not the quickest at retorts and when Im put on the spot like that I stumble over my words.

A tinkly laugh/did you mean to be so rude etc aren't particularly sharp.

Im not going to change how I talk. I shouldnt have to. He knew exactly what I was talking about and was just trying (and succeeding) in embarassing me. I can see that certain words/phrases might need to be explained.

This isnt meant to be a discussion about why "dinner" is correct.

(BTW I also use toilet and HATE loo and will never use it).

‘the only person you’re embarrassing here is yourself.’

is my go to retort to arseholes.

"Don't ever go to France, will you, Dave - all of them there speak using these funny words all the time that wouldn't meet with your approval at all!"

This.
It is tea in my house. We’re in the NE, I hate that NE things are automatically seen as lower class, I certainly wouldn’t accept it to my face.

That reminds me of the big West Country classic rock revival concert, with some really iconic acts, that was planned to be held using a boat on the river Tamar as a mobile stage - but sadly it had to be cancelled after nobody could agree whether The Jam or Cream would go on first.

'and a cunt is something you have, right?...' 😁

But in reality I'd say 'Aren't regional differences occurring!'

Some of these responses have me a good laugh 😂

‘Dinner is the meal you have around noon or thereabouts, Fred.’

Tea is correct, OP, for millions upon millions of us. You’re in excellent company.

Just repeat what you said, more strongly. I had a colleague like this. Very posh, who would try to correct me. Once I said the time was “haff, passt 3” and he said “you mean harf parrst JHound”.

I looked at my watch again and said “no, it’s definitely HAFF, PASST, three”.

He never did it again.

Tomato tomato, sorry if regional differences are a bit too confusing for you Dave

Well, I am following with interest.

I'm Australian and trust me people think it's hilarious to take the piss out of my accent quite often, or the words I use. Someone once tried to 'give me a compliment' by saying I was 'quite educated for an Australian'. I retorted by saying 'Thanks. How many degrees do you have? I have 5'.

Fucking tedious it is.

"You understood what I said. No need to correct my dialect [you arsehole]."

Dinner is at 12 and tea is 5/6, at tea time

Reaction would have been yep, always been tea in my house, i'm a northerner

Dr Google says: Some people call their evening meal "tea" due to regional differences and class distinctions, particularly in northern and working-class parts of the UK, where the term has roots in the time when the main meal was eaten at midday. Historically, the evening meal was a lighter, later meal accompanied by tea, and this usage persisted in these communities even as the main evening meal migrated to a later time, while more affluent and southern regions typically used the word "dinner" for the evening meal.

You should have called him a cunt and stood on his toes.

I think the best reply is silence, maybe widening your eyes a bit implying he's really embarrassed himself and you're cringing for him.

Either “I’m sorry?” and “I said what’s for tea…did you think I meant like earl grey or camomile?” make him explain that he couldn’t possibly have worked out what you meant from the context because he’s just that stupid.

Or
“oh I forget youve never been outside the M25. God that must make things difficult.”

Im also a ‘posh’ northerner and I can’t stand this. They wouldn’t dream of correcting an American saying ‘bathroom’ instead of loo. Upper class northerners do not do this so it’s not just a class thing, it’s a specific group of southerners who think we’re all miners and farmers with outside toilets and no central heating, crowding round t’wireless of an evening.

This is perfect! 👌

I agree, no verbal response, just let there be an awkward silence and look at him with a concerned expression. Like he's just pissed his pants.

...but Google could just as easily have said "Some people call their evening meal "dinner" due to regional differences and class distinctions, particularly in southern and middle OR working-class parts of the UK"

Only an arsehole (like your man Dave here) tries to belittle people who call it by a different name from themselves - either way around; but I hate it how many of those who call it dinner naturally assume that they are universally right and others must therefore be wrong.

To me, it has overtones of the kind of person who will laugh at a foreigner's pronunciation of English, even though they themselves wouldn't know a single word in the other person's language.

“No, I meant tea, that’s why I said tea”. Why does it have to be anything else?
Of course you could then add “you pompous prick, f*ck off” but that’s entirely optional.

I’d make out that they are ignorantly rude. “Well, language is a bit more diverse than that, isn’t it? People use different words depending on where they have lived. So when you correct people, you may be the one that seems wrong.”

Or, if you want to pretend he’s not a twat but rather a source of silly amusement, say, “Ah! You’re one of the sconn / scohn barm cake / tea cake arguers that one sees on Facebook, aren’t you!”

Or, most damning of all: “Have you ever travelled outside of [the M25 / Suffolk etc]?

'Well it's known as tea in some places. Have you not travelled much yourself Dave? '

(Spotlight back on him)

"Aren't regional dialects interesting? In my neck of the woods dinner is served at noon. You'll have to watch out for that if you head north of Watford"

He was sharp with her, in front of others. He tried to make a fool of her. Not saying anything at the time makes it look like she accepts this shitty behaviour.

Love this one!

I am a Northerner living in the South . I am a teacher and the kids often tease me in a good natured way . I say either , “ hey , I have just increased your cultural capital “ ( a buzz word in our school ) or “ yup. I only came down South to learn you lot how to speak proper ! “