Is this really what primary school kids are like?

[HopelesslyNaive98]

Colleague’s child recently had their 8th birthday. Photos they posted showed child receiving make up from fairly pricy brands (ie. Sephora, Benefit etc.), beauty blenders snd similar, Uggs, and a Stanley cup. Birthday outing appeared to involve having make up done in store, more make up shopping, and clothes shopping in teen/adult focused shops.

Don’t get me wrong, I was desperate to put on a bit of make up as a little girl but it was a bit of body glitter and some lip gloss that came free with a Top of the Pops magazine. Equally clothes were Gap Kids and H&M, not River Island and Lipsy.

My kids are 7 and 6 so maybe I’m just totally naive about what’s to come. I just thought there was a few more years of childhood left!

My daughter is 12, year 8 at secondary and has just started to have an interest in makeup (lipglosses mainly!) and skincare bits now, definitely not at 8. I won’t get her uggs until her feet have stopped growing! She still likes some “younger” things as well. I would find it sad if that’s all they were into so young

Not around here, no. Although in fairness DD might if I let her. She has asked for skincare and makeup but other than occasionally letting her experiment with eyeshadow its been a firm no from me. I've explained that she doesn't need it and skincare wise it could actually cause permanent damage to her skin and she's accepted it. There is 1 maybe 2 like that in DD's year that I know of but otherwise no - not DD nor any of her friends.

Yeah….my eldest DD is 10, and so many of the girls at her school are like mini teenagers already.
My DD appears to be clinging to her childhood for a bit longer though. She’s asked a few times about makeup and skincare from Sephora and Ulta, but has been receptive to my reasons for saying no - particularly with the skincare. I took her into my bathroom and showed her some of my products and explained what the active ingredients do - and that’s not something her delicate skin barrier needs right now. She needs to be protecting her skin barrier, so we met in the middle and I got her a very gentle cleanser and a moisturiser with SPF but no active ingredients.

Ok so what skincare do childen need? I didn't feel the need to disclose my child's ethnicity.

You didn’t need to. Your child is obviously white.

My black daughter has used cocoa body on her face and body since birth. Soap and water would be incredibly drying.

It wasn’t quite true for my daughter at 8 but it definitely was for some of her peers. I’d say she’s more like that now at 11. In some ways she like a mini teenager but in others she’s still very much a child, eg how much she loves her soft toys and still likes cuddles with me.

My 13yo likes clothes, hair, and makeup but it’s more Primark and Superdrug. I’m sure they’re all different (and maybe things have changed in 5 years) but no, I don’t think all 8 year olds are like that.

My DD (7) and her friends all love make up. It’s weird as I don’t wear it at all. She is allowed to wear it for the occasional party but its hardly a professional look - it’s applied in a similar way to face paints.

Parties here are still things like clip n climb and now sleepovers.

There is a friend who has everything ‘fashionable’ who I think influences my DD. Suddenly she wants Uggs which I also don’t wear and I know that’s come directly from her friend (she’s not having them).

Are you sure my child is white? I haven't disclosed my child's ethnicity. You are assuming she is.
Whatever, children don't need make up and stanley cups and expensive skin care like facial scrubs that influencers are trying to push on to children is my point. I'm not talking about cocoa butter and moisturisers.

I know a lot of 8 year olds and none of them are like this at all. Perhaps it’s just where we live or some other demographic but all the 8 year olds I know are still very much children. Still asking for toys for Christmas, definitely not interested in anything from the Debenhams make up counters!

I teach year 4 so 8/9 year olds. Obviously I know I’m seeing a snapshot in my school/my local area but I’d say each year you have about five or six girls (out of fifteen or so in each class), who are like this. Obsessed with makeup, Stanley cups etc etc, and have expensive stuff. But that leaves nine or ten who aren’t. So it is happening, these girls are out there, but not all of them are like that!

Unfortunately it does happen, but is far from universal.

DD1 just turned 8 too. The only makeup she has is one of those water-based kids' play sets with a battery-powered unicorn dryer for the nails. She messaged her Y7 friend (using my phone, hence I can read everything) to say that she'd 'tried makeup', and the Y7 friend (a 'young' 11) was horrified, thinking it was proper stuff. The Y7 friend isn't allowed it. Apart from her uniform, I don't think my DD owns any clothing that didn't come from a charity shop or Vinted, and she's never even asked why.

That said, DD does have friends with Versace coats, Ugg boots and their own iPads, and at the PTA disco there are usually a couple of classmates who come in dressed and made up like tarts.

Ime one subset of the girls suddenly flip to this identity in Year 4, usually influenced by TikTok (the equivalent boys group starts absorbing and repeating inappropriate sexual/manosphere content).
It isn't universal, however, and most schools clamp down quite firmly on bringing it all into class.

Eeshk
My daughter and pals are turning 8 and they mainly want parties at lazer tag / trampoline parks. We're in Scotland P4 so coming to the last of the 8th birthdays for the year. A lot of the presents are lego, craft bits, science kits and stuff like spirograph. Some clothes like oodies, hoodies with k pop characters are popular too. DD doesn't have any girls in her class of 22 who wear make up, as far as I can tell anyway.

Nope, not in my experience. My youngest is that age. They’re doing tea parties at home, soft play and trampoline parks. Eldest is turning 13 and they are having pool parties and pizza parties and sleepovers. Most exciting one was going to a nail salon and Wagamama for lunch (that was just her and her best friend though, not a party).

With 13 year old, they do buy each other lip gloss and body spray and face glitter and things like that, but definitely no ‘brands.’

I think neither of my dc would attract friends who are into Sephora and Stanley cups though as Dh and I definitely not those sorts. 😂 This is obviously being driven by the parents trying to one up each other. My 8 year old would have no idea what a Stanley is!

Gdd1 is 10, and AFAIK this sort of thing is certainly not usual among her many friends.

Not all kids that age are like this, but some definitely are. The dividing line is usually which of them are allowed access to TikTok. This article is eye-opening and depressing. www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-14787891/amp/TikTok-Children-skincare-harmful-allergies.html

My daughter just had her 8th birthday - Lego, animal crossing toys, squishmallows and cash/ vouchers. I don’t know any 8yr olds with TikTok or drunk elephant …. 11-12, yeah, not 8. Not normal.

if you let your 8y old have TikTok, snap or Facebook you’ve got bigger issues.

8 have a child that age. There are a couple in the class who might like that stuff (e.g have a Stanley and labubu) but the recent parties have all been variations of climbing/trampolining/potion making. No teen parties

I have 9 and 12yo dds. 9yo does have some friends who are into this stuff and others who aren’t at all, it doesn’t make a difference to her. She has a small collection of skincare/make up type things (mix of gifts and things she’s bought herself) but doesn’t really use them.

12yo spends nearly all of her money on skincare and body sprays etc, and on getting her hair done. She saves up and has a constant list of what to buy next. I find it a bit baffling but it doesn’t bother me - she may still be ‘preteen’ in age but is very much post-adolescence, so I don’t feel it’s abnormal at all. She doesn’t use Tik tok.

i find it very odd in primary school children and while it’s all a lot more expensive than in our day, for secondary school children it seems quite normal these days.

Not normal in my experience. My DD and her friends are just turning 8 and one of them did have a pamper party but her mum works in the salon and it was just nail varnish, hair glitter, pink lemonade and dancing etc. I can only think of one girl in her class who always turns up to the school disco in branded clothes, heels and makeup (and has done since reception) but I've always found her mum a bit odd and obsessed with making her DD into "a mini best friend". She also sent her as Regina George for World Book Day when she was 5....

Most of them are asking for Labubu's, Kpop Demon Hunters merch and their ears pierced.

I think kids are far more wholesome and stay children much younger than they did when I was younger. When I was younger you were on your own at 18, parents minimally supported university etc. parents seem so much more supportive and neutering now.

no, we didn’t have Sephora and Uggs, they didn’t exist and people didn’t have as much disposable income as they do post globalisation.

I did have school friends who were having sex at 12 though, and teenage pregnancy was bloody rampant. I think I’d rather Sephora and Stanley 🤨

Designer stuff, the net and vacuous influencers weren’t around when my kids were young - thank goodness.

They could just be children. 👍

I’m certain they are white.

Of course they are skin care. You said all a child needs is soap and water. It isn’t, and that’s a very white centric view.

Fortunately my children haven’t been exposed to social media