Page 3 | AIBU to be upset that dd12 didn’t go on any rides at Alton Towers

Cakeandusername · 28/10/2025 11:36

More info needed. Did she not go on anything at all? There’s lots of tamer attractions.
If it was because she was with friends only wanting to go on the big rides then it sounds a mismatch and not really fair on her.
I went with Guides recently (yr7 and yr8) some wanted bigger rides. I had the tamer group - there was still stuff to go on - a mine train, one like teacups, gangster granny. They had fun. The gardens were nice too, kids also enjoyed navigating around the park and the Halloween decorations were nice there was a Halloween dance show too.
One leader had a child with her who point blank refused to go on anything and I did think it was a waste she had gone was an expensive trip.

WhatNoRaisins · 28/10/2025 11:37

It's tricky, it doesn't sound like a fun trip for anyone if she was overwhelmed and needing her friends support when they just wanted to have fun.

Dartmoorcheffy · 28/10/2025 11:40

So 3 of them went then? That's poor planning. 4 of them would work better. 2 go on the ride, other 2 hold the bags then swap.

SmallestGnome · 28/10/2025 11:46

Hghlandlow · 28/10/2025 10:05

just that really. I’m fighting with that’s ok not everyone likes rides and wanting her to just not be scared of things. She went with friends so created an issue with her being the only one not going on

My 14yo son is autistic and doesn't go on rides but he likes to go to Alton Towers 2x per year (we live about 2 hours away) just to watch and listen to the rollercoasters. He has a strong interest in rollercoasters but doesn't like actually riding them, just learning rollercoaster facts and seeing them in action really. Alton Towers is always a great day out even if we don't manage to get on anything.

RessicaJabbit · 28/10/2025 11:53

Why did she go in the first place?

WiltedLettuce · 28/10/2025 11:54

Sometimes you pay for your kids to do things and they don't make the most of them.

When I took my older one to Chessington, he got bored waiting in the queues so we gave up, was terrified by the one ride he did go on, asked to play all the side-games which cost extra and ended up spending most of our time there in the soft play. We've tried theme parks a couple more times but they've always been awful. Not on our radar now for the near future.

That said, if DC wanted to go with friends when he's older, I'd reluctantly pay because, although it might be a waste of money, it's also a social learning thing about personal boundaries and not always having to be involved in everything. Sometimes it's fine to sit things out. Growing up is complicated.

LBFseBrom · 28/10/2025 12:01

Maybe she doesn't do heights. I don't. Tbh I'd have thought you'd have known by now if that was the case.

I think you should stay out of it.

diddl · 28/10/2025 12:04

leporello · 28/10/2025 10:45

I remember the adverts for Alton Towers ahead of its opening - I was about 9 and desperate to go, not for the rides but because the gardens looked so lovely (I was born to be a retired lady 😂). All kids don't like the same things.

I went before before there were any rides.

It was lovely.

Went after & just thought how it was now (to me) ruined.

CaptainMyCaptain · 28/10/2025 12:12

Crunchienuts · 28/10/2025 10:17

It’s fine not liking rides, but she probably shouldn’t have bothered going.

This. I hate that sort of thing and just wouldn't have gone. Maybe she thought she'd like it but, in the event, changed her mind. I don't know why you are upset about it though.

ThrushorSparrow · 28/10/2025 12:12

Not sure what you're going to gain by being upset. Perhaps you could take her somewhere that has more gentle rides if that is the issue. But riding roller coasters is hardly a life skill so it doesn't really matter.

lalaloopyhead · 28/10/2025 12:16

Was this a school trip, or did you take them?

My DD went to Alton Towers on a school trip, I knew she wouldn't like it but she obviously didn't want to miss out. I don't think she went on many rides and ended up waiting around alot for her friends....not great but that was ger choice.

The next time the trip came around I was pleased that she was able to say no, she didn't want to go. I understand it is important to help our kids to not be afraid but rollercoasters are not everyones cup of tea and I think it is just as important for kids to learn its ok to stand up for themselves and say they don't want to do something, rather than do it because everyone else is.

LastHurrahs · 28/10/2025 12:17

Hghlandlow · 28/10/2025 11:31

Only Issue being it was an odd number for sitting on the rides, she would have been on her own when waiting for them and she said she wanted to go on the rides. If think I would have told her to own it and say she’d be the bag holder. I haven’t asked but she’s likely to have been in tears as she does when overwhelmed.

I'm not entirely clear what the situation was -- she wanted to go on the rides but didn't go on them? Why? Because she got scared at the last minute? Because she's habitually cautious about new experiences?

Creepybookworm · 28/10/2025 12:23

My older teen DS got us to buy him.a ticket to Fright Night at Thorpe Park because he wanted to go with friends. He went on one water ride, got wet, decided he hated rides (he also hates scary things and won't watch horror). So he sat in the cafe. It was a lesson learned, he now knows amusement parks are not for him. Sometimes you have to experience things.

swissmummy12345 · 28/10/2025 12:23

I don’t blame her, a girl had to have her leg amputated after an accident on The Smiler ride at Alton Towers in 2015. I wouldn’t be letting my kids go anywhere near there.

ThatWorthyAquaFox · 28/10/2025 12:24

AuntieDolly · 28/10/2025 10:19

Someone has to look after the bags …

Exactly. Chief bag watcher.

Surely she can't be scared of the teacups?

Cakeandusername · 28/10/2025 12:24

If she didn’t want to ride she could queue with them then just wait near exit whilst they ride. It will only be 5 mins in own if that.
If she wanted to ride then why didn’t she? If there were 3 of them fairer to move round so each one got a random person sat with them each time. Or go on as single riders and save lines at some rides.
Speak to her and see what was going on.

Calliopespa · 28/10/2025 12:26

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 28/10/2025 10:09

Yabu to be upset yourself. Take the cue from her. If she’s fine with it then don’t worry. sometimes it’s braver to say I don’t want to do what everyone else is doing and follow her gut, than to cave to peer pressure.

This is very true. Consider her brave in standing her ground and not just following blindly - which is a more useful type of bravery for application in the real world, as opposed to being tossed around helplessly at a height.

It is also good she did not feel she had to duck out of the day entirely, but went along for the companionship. She sounds very mature to me.

Quite honestly, I am not sure lower intellect doesn't assist with the type of bravery that revels in roller coasters and those kinds of thrills.

AnAlpacaForChristmasPleaseSanta · 28/10/2025 12:32

5foot5 · 28/10/2025 10:14

This really.

I mean, what did she get out of the day if she just spent it waiting for her mates to have the ride, waiting in a queue with them, listening to them talk about the ride afterwards. Isn't that just a way to feel left out?

FWIW I hate scary rides too and wouldn't go on them. But surely there are some non-scary rides too. It seems a shame if none of her mates would go on the less scary ones with her

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FWIW I hate scary rides too and wouldn't go on them. But surely there are some non-scary rides too. It seems a shame if none of her mates would go on the less scary ones with her

💯Agree.
I hate scary rides because I'm not that tall and even through I'm over the height restriction I never feel like I am fully secured in even with the bar over me, so I never go on them.

More than happy to do the river rapids, teacups, log flume and last time I was at the theme park (approx 20 years ago) there were loads of funfair stands, throw beanbags and knock off tins to win a prize type things that kept me amused.

DontStopMeNowGoodTime · 28/10/2025 12:35

Hghlandlow · 28/10/2025 11:31

Only Issue being it was an odd number for sitting on the rides, she would have been on her own when waiting for them and she said she wanted to go on the rides. If think I would have told her to own it and say she’d be the bag holder. I haven’t asked but she’s likely to have been in tears as she does when overwhelmed.

This was me when I was a teenager, none of my friends ever minded and would even go on the carousel with me-the only ride I could manage. If her and her pals are going to a fairground again, tell her to own it and be the bag holder and to ask her friends to go on a smaller ride with her. My friends really didn't mind and we still laugh about it now.

SemperIdem · 28/10/2025 12:37

Calliopespa · 28/10/2025 12:26

This is very true. Consider her brave in standing her ground and not just following blindly - which is a more useful type of bravery for application in the real world, as opposed to being tossed around helplessly at a height.

It is also good she did not feel she had to duck out of the day entirely, but went along for the companionship. She sounds very mature to me.

Quite honestly, I am not sure lower intellect doesn't assist with the type of bravery that revels in roller coasters and those kinds of thrills.

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Quite the reach you’re making there, that only people of “lower intellect” enjoy theme park rides 😂

Createausername1970 · 28/10/2025 12:38

I have read your update and I am still not clear about what happened.

Are you saying she "chose" not to go on the rides?

Or, as there was an odd number of friends, she was always the one who would ride alone (on a two seater ride) because none of the others would sit with her?

Two totally different scenarios.

JarvisIsland · 28/10/2025 12:39

swissmummy12345 · 28/10/2025 12:23

I don’t blame her, a girl had to have her leg amputated after an accident on The Smiler ride at Alton Towers in 2015. I wouldn’t be letting my kids go anywhere near there.

The fact that this 10 year old incident is still the one brought up, Theme Parks are very safe in comparison to an awful lot of activities. If they went there using the public road network that's by far and away the most dangerous 'ride' they went on that day.

I do think fair play for not going on rides you don't want to, but definitely best to own it and make yourself useful as the bag watcher, the queuer for snacks while they are on the rides etc. Alton Towers also has loads of other things to do as well as the big rides, and actually a very nice gardens to go round.

I also see the friend's side of it making an odd number, especially if they are young-ish girls. Rides will ram empty spaces if it's even slightly busy (guessing Scarefest given the post timing at that will be quite busy) and so one of them could end up getting stuck in the photos next to a random etc which is probably important when you are young.

Charlotte120221 · 28/10/2025 12:40

That's a shame - we never went to theme parks after ds was about 7 as he would get in such a state in a queue for a roller coaster that we all had a miserable time.

Good for her that she was able to go. Did she enjoy her day despite not going on the rides? Were there any smaller rides she could go on?

If she enjoyed herself then I'd say that is a small win (despite being a waste of money) - maybe she'll try something next time?

Calliopespa · 28/10/2025 12:43

SemperIdem · 28/10/2025 12:37

Quite the reach you’re making there, that only people of “lower intellect” enjoy theme park rides 😂

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I didn't say "only." That's you reaching.

But if you think about it, there is nothing anyone could do if their rollercoaster bar gave way or similar - no quick-thinking or even physical prowess would save you, so the only thing being trusted to is blind luck - which never strikes me as a particularly intellectual stance.

BriefEncountersOfTheThirdKind · 28/10/2025 12:44

Tomorrowtodaywhenever · 28/10/2025 11:08

We went to alton towers earlier this year.
If her friends were only going on the big rides, I don't blame her.
I literally felt like I had been in a car crash after the smiler ride.
It was for my sons birthday and I was the only adult that could go on with him and he needed a adult and honestly, it was bloody awful.
There are some smaller rides of course, DH has a heart condition and took our young son on those. I imaginr 12 year olds would not be interested in those.
But I had to endure the big rides and it took me a few days to recover.
The big rides at alton towers are really extreme.
There have been several accidents on the alton towers rides as well. I think someone died in the river rapids and someone got a leg chopped off on the smiler.
So, I think she is quite sensible 😂

There haven't been "several" accidents

Even The Smiler incident was about 10 years ago now - it was horrific and your flippant "leg chopped off" comment isn't really very nice - but the ride has run very safely since

The person who died on the rapids was at Drayton Manor and was because of a various factors which weren't the park's fault!