For admonishing DM - diabetes and having cake as a meal

[StationHouse89]

DM has been diabetic for last few years. Terrible diet. Very little exercise. On metformin. Doing things together over the weekend her meals would often consist of a massive piece of cake, hot chocolate with cream and marshmallows etc etc. I got frustrated with it and pointed out how terrible for her condition this is - to me it seems pointless to me to be taking medication then doing this to yourself. She seems quite put out. AIBU?

No, it can’t be. Wrong suggestion.

Sorry, I thought I had heard that, but I just checked and cravings should not happen unless she forgets to check her blood and then gets a hypo.

I didn’t say you will “eventually fail” (even though diabetes is not a failure) - but it’s very easy to get it right when it’s only been a matter of weeks.

I have a diabetic husband and both his parents are also diabetic - it’s not easy and sometimes you can do everything “right” and still end up relying on medication to stay alive.

I’m just saying, don’t be so smug so early on. You don’t know what will happen later on in your journey.

DH has been diabetic for a long time. He’s extremely well controlled and has very good bloods.
He eats what I eat, he will also have dessert occasionally and plan for it, take some extra insulin etc. however he is in touch with his blood sugars enough to understand how to do this. He has spent decades working all this out though.
He is however, the only person who isn’t overweight at clinic. They used to harass him to get his bloods even more perfect but now they have stepped back. I think compared to the majority of the people they are seeing now are so badly controlled, he’s not a priority. He doesn’t eat junk and he doesn’t drink.

My friends mum sporadically took insulin, would eat a takeaway every few days, snacked the rest of the time, just running on high blood sugars. She did not live long.

I think YABU; it’s her life. Most of us make choices that aren’t in the interests of our optimal health. My dad is receiving cancer treatment and was advised to avoid alcohol - he still has a drink (not every day!). He jokes that life has to be worth living. I wouldn’t dream of telling him what to do.

I have heard doing the same with as jacket potato cooking and cooling helps too.

How so you reheat the pasta? Just in water?

Because her poor life choices and the consequences are likely to impact the OP negatively. You must realise that?

DH recently spent a few weeks in hospital on cardiac wards (not lifestyle related) and on one of them he was the only patient who wasn't overweight and diabetic. I asked DH how he knew and he said it was obvious when the nurses came round with diabetic meds at mealtimes.

It really brought it home to me how important it was to take diabetes seriously.

This person tested this out using a blood sugar monitor and found that there was scarcely any difference when eating a refrigerated potato.

A very close relative has T2 diabetes. As she hasn't taken her diet seriously it is now having other health implications. She has neuropathy in her feet. She now has to inject insulin and is on statins and other related medication.

I never tell her what to eat, but I worry about her.

If taking action to get back in control of one’s own health and actually achieving it is considered “smug” nowadays then no wonder we are in the grip of a health and obesity crisis.

Maybe you and your husband should read the books I mentioned. You might find them interesting. There are real examples given of people who have been able to come off all medication, including insulin, by following what the literature recommends.

For the vast majority of type 2 diabetics it is a failure (bar the very few where genetics play more of a role than diet and lifestyle - this might be your husband, it might not, I don’t know). It’s a failure to take care of your health. People won’t like me saying that and I’m sure I’ll get some shitty replies but it’s also true. I include myself in that despite not being diagnosed. For the last 5-6 years I have failed to look after myself properly and hyperglycaemia was the result. Thankfully it was identified before any symptoms began and it gave me the absolute kick up the arse I needed to take back control of myself. Which I have and am doing, so I’m glad I had that initial blood test. It has literally allowed me to change my life and have a massive shift in mindset and attitude. If that’s smug, then so be it.

I’m not sure yet. I need to read about it a bit more. I’m avoiding potatoes, bread, pasta, rice etc for now, but will experiment with them in a few months. I think maybe mixing a little olive oil in so it doesn’t stick together when cooled and then like you say adding a little water for reheating too. It will be trial and error I think.
They also say going for a walk after eating a carby meal will help bring levels down quicker too, which makes sense, so I will test that out to see what is optimum for me. Might invest in a walking pad. 🙂

I've checked the blood glucose before and after with my CGM with potato and pasta. For me, sadly fuck all difference in the rise.

Taylor's work is fascinating and if I had been diagnosed early with my diabetes, I would have given it a go.

The Glucose Goddess is really worth a read. Her theories and science make sense and for me eating raw veges, protein and then carbs makes a difference.

But don't you ever wonder about what is behind the 'failure' to take care of their health? It's not what you eat, it's why you eat what your eat. It's probably very difficult to understand why people don't put their health first but I would hope GPs with their training would try and explore that.

For the vast majority of type 2 diabetics it is a failure

You are being far, far too simplistic.

Like @Slimtoddy says, it's not just what you eat, it's why you eat it. DH, for example, also has ADHD and that comes with its' own issues around food. He also has to fight genetics as diabetes goes back generations on both sides of his family.

It's really (genuinely) great that you've made changes and have found it easy, but lots of people aren't so lucky. There are plenty of people who can't change their entire diet like you for various reasons (allergies, intolerances, sensory issues, stomach problems) as well as people who DO make changes but still up relying on medication to regulate their sugars.

FWIW it's not the making changes and achieving it that makes you smug, it's your attitude that everyone else is just rubbish and they just need to try harder.

Diabetes is a sign of terrible unresolved trauma. It's a food addiction, body hatred and lack of support from healthcare.

She's eating to self medicate but it's actually slow suicide. It's so sad. She desperately needs therapy.

Diabetes is a sign that your pancreas isn’t working properly.

Diabetes is also strongly influenced by genetics. It's not a result of unresolved trauma you plank.

I wonder how many who voted are diabetic and have to deal with this cr*p themselves everyday. Or just being judgy about something they aren’t having to fight constantly. WE DIABETICS ARE HUMAN AFTER ALL!!! Don’t patronise!!!