Why do men cheat? Lily Allen & David Harbour edition

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Why the fuck do men (and women, don't get me wrong) cheat?

David Harbour and Lily Allen had a seemingly good marriage, and he cheated with a younger colleague.

Why do people cheat, especially when they have a good thing going?

Edited to add. I meant Edition!

@Bambamhoohoo I work in music , you are very wrong - a lot of songwriters are ‘bought out’ and the artist credited - a very well known female singer songwriter from a good few years ago has all songs credited to her, she didn’t write a thing , but I know the guy who wrote them all and he was paid handsomely to sign over and keep his mouth shut and he’s done it for several artists too

Oh thats interesting. Buying credit for anothers artistic outputs should be illegal really. Why didn’t she just credit him on the track? That would’ve cost less upfront and been more ethical.

NB: some children’s books also.

There are as many reasons to cheat as there are cheaters:

• Boredom in the marriage/cabin fever
• Incompatibility
• Insecurity/lack of trust
• Compulsive inability to be satisfied having sex with the same person
• A marriage having genuinely run its course and cheating is the catalyst needed to leave

Its obviously shit behaviour which damages everyone concerned.

But I personally think marriage is a real millstone and something which far too many people enter into far too quickly and easily.

This is a great example of two people who should never have got married in the first place.

Many people get married too young, too soon and for the wrong reasons.

In my case with the ex, he literally wanted to have his cake and eat it. We were married, owned a house, had a 3yr old and I was pregnant with our 2nd baby (a very much planned baby!) only to find out he was having an affair with a colleague that had been going on for well over a year. It was all ego for him. I was the boring, pregnant wife, she was the responsibility free, carefree ego boost. I kicked him out in the spot.

There most certainly is such a thing as a ghost writer for music and songs.

My ex DH cheated. We had a wonderful life, beautiful home, amazing children and good jobs. It took one night for that to go away.

One day I had everything, and when I woke up the next day it was all gone. It changed me, I became hardened. It’s like it took a piece of my soul. I had never felt pain like it, I was grieving for a man still alive.

Now I’m in social housing, in a crap job that I don’t like, he left us destitute.

Sorry I’m rambling, but I asked him why once and he told me that it was the biggest mistake of his life. The reason why he did it was because his group of friends all visited a brothel, and they all cheated.

David Harbour and Lily Allen had a seemingly good marriage,

'Seemingly' is doing an awful lot of heavy lifting in that sentence! You have no idea of what goes on in people's lives in private. Particulary with celebrities where people think they know them, but they don't. It's an image.

The woman the Daily Mail alleges he cheated with looks a lot like his ex. Regardless, they weren’t right for each other but it’s a shame for her children.

I’m so sorry this has happened to you ..x
How come everything went so awful? , I know that cheating is terrible obviously but whst happened ?

@Missj25This is very outing but I don’t care at this point. The prostitute he cheated on me with started message my children. That’s how I found out he had cheated, I chucked him out and believe it or not he began a relationship with her. It turns out she had severe mental health issues and she started stalking my family and I.

My exDH attacked me and ended up in jail, which increased his prostitutes anger towards myself and all of my family. She ended up with a conviction but served no jail time.

When he was released I was given a restraining order against him, so he couldn’t hurt me but he hurt me financially instead. The OW then constantly called social services on me, called the rspca (I had no animals) called taxis, pizzas and everything else you could think of.

I left my job because she was calling up to 100 times a day, for no reason at all. I had never even met her, never spoken to her or anything. She was just crazy.

They split up and she’s left me alone now and is doing it to him, she’s terrorising him.

@Missj25I’m in my 40s and he is nearly 50, this girl is in her late 20s. He tried to come back numerous times which I probably think flamed her anger of me.

She has no job so spends her day stalking people on social media. She even called my parents on Facebook messenger doing sex noises to them. She’s just not right at all.

She found my threads on here too which is why I constantly changed my username. I’m sick of mental health constantly being used to excuse behaviour, imo I think she needs locking up

This happened 2016/17 and even in the summer she was seen sat outside my house in her car, I don’t even know her! I have never done a single thing to her but she despises the ground I walk on. My ex DH said it’s because she’s very jealous and was worried he would come back to me. Believe me he tried numerous times over the years but as much as it broke my heart, I would never ever get back with him

I think in this particular case it is not that black and white.

It seems she cheated on her first husband and had an open marriage with her second.

I always think that open relationships will always end up in tears.

I do like her but I do think she seems to me to be rather troubled in general and she does not make the best decisions when it comes to healthy relationships.

In general I think people cheat because they want an ego boost, are bored in their relationship or simply think they can get away with it and have little respect for their partner. I think famous/wealthy people will also have people attracted to them because of their status so they have more opportunities to cheat as well.

Jesus Christ OP , it reads from something like out of a movie ..
I thought he cheated out with friends one night & that was it ..
That sounds horrific ..
Your husband attacking you 😔 , & ending up in jail …
And you guys had such a lovely life..
I hope you find happiness again OP ❤️

Cheryl Cole?😂😂😂😂

Zero impulse control and lack of respect for their partner.

Ew.

In todays episode of “A Woman is Always to Blame”.

People cheat for a whole myriad of reasons. There is really no one-size fits all.

I know (of) one man who is a serial cheat, everyone acknowledges he's pretty scuzzy. He just can't seem to keep it in his pants.

I have two good friends who are the most perfectly matched couple you'll ever meet. They met each other years ago while they were both in relationships (albeit not married) with other people. They are open about the fact that their relationship started in poor circumstances and that they didn't act as they should have done.

Some people cheat because they're bored, some because they feel undesired or unfulfilled in their relationship, some because they're addicted to the rush or the attention, some because they genuinely love the other man / woman, some because they're opportunists, some because they're bloody stupid and don't think.

It does not follow that the woman they are sleeping with is cheating on anybody.

This. It was only a matter of time before it ended one way or another. No one was surprised. Train wreck.

So blame a woman for a man’s behaviour.

I think the answer can be varying reasons but for many men it is simply the old why do dogs lick their bollocks thing.

Yes, sometimes. Anyway I’m talking about their marriage was doomed to fail. Not specifically why he cheated. Plenty of people have already commented on the many reasons people cheat. But if you’re married to a nut job and the marriage is over then you may as well cheat. See Lily Allen. See Alice Evens.

How nasty

She's got a huge ego and a lot of issues.

He's got a huge ego and a lot of issues.

They had an open relationship apparently but he took it "too far".