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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Boss keeps contacting me while on leave?

135 replies

wetlettuce41 · 23/10/2025 09:02

AIBU to want to be left alone to enjoy my leave?

Only on my second day of leave, and both days I have had missed calls from my boss at 8am…

Then he got a colleague to text me and ask for a call back.

Yesterday I did phone back, thinking it was urgent.

It really wasn’t. To do with my flexible working arrangement not having its yearly review back in June. This was supposed to be done by previous boss. I logged on yesterday as requested by new boss and sent through all the paperwork, forwarded the emails from June to show that I did send old boss the paperwork… I don’t know why it hasn’t been done. He said HR is on his back about it.

Not my problem is it?

I’ve done what was asked yesterday and this morning I’ve had another 8am phone call when I am trying to relax and text messages asking me to call back.

I work in the public sector. Never had this before. Boss is newly promoted.

OP posts:
tripleginandtonic · 23/10/2025 09:04

You shouldn't have sent the stuff through when you were on leave. Just say, I'll sort it when I'm back and then don't reply to anything else.

Zempy · 23/10/2025 09:04

I just wouldn’t respond. I’m assuming this is your personal phone? Surely that’s for emergency use only?

AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 23/10/2025 09:04

“I’m on leave. I’ll respond when I’m back.”

Then stop responding. You’re enabling this shitty behaviour.

Posithor · 23/10/2025 09:05

If my own mother rang at 8am id not be answering.

DisplayPurposesOnly · 23/10/2025 09:06

Hi boss, I'm on holiday so won't reply to any more messages. Unless the building has burned down, there's nothing that can't wait til I'm back.

ApolloandDaphne · 23/10/2025 09:06

Text back and remind him you are on annual leave and will sort out whatever it is he wants on your return. I would tell him you are going to be busy and won't be responding to any further messages. Then relax and ignore him.

Greenwitchart · 23/10/2025 09:07

Don't respond to any work calls or messages and when you are back from leave state that you don't deal with work issues while you are on holiday.

DramaQueenlady · 23/10/2025 09:07

How long are you of for. Its not acceptable to call you. If it were me id call him ask what the problem is and tell him to stop calling. Make it clear you're feeling harassed. Or indeed send a text advising whatever he wants will wait till your back and to stop harrassing you.

thinkfast · 23/10/2025 09:07

I’d reply back - is this urgent? I’m on leave and therefore don’t expect to be disturbed unless it’s an emergency that no-one else can fix. It’s essential for my health and well-being that I’m allowed time to switch off from work.

Tamfs · 23/10/2025 09:09

You need to set a boundary now. I had one of these - I used to block him on my personal phone outside of working hours. He then would email my personal email, so I had to block him on that. Then he tries WhatsApp. Blocked. Then LinkedIn. Blocked. Unhinged behaviour, and harassment if I could have been arsed to take it anywhere. Instead I chose to just not respond.

I don't know how these people get promoted.

hellotojason · 23/10/2025 09:10

I'm a public sector manager - the only occasion I could do this is if it was a serious safeguarding concern that needed their input /court mandated but even then would be doing everything to avoid speaking with the person on leave. In my local authority this would be something I'd end up with a telling off for (rightly). In essence what I'm saying is this is your manager not understanding boundaries and is not an expectation you respond. I'd respond as others have suggested and then if on WA I would archive the chat until you're back in work so don't see them.

pinkfondu · 23/10/2025 09:11

Log this now as unreasonable behaviour. And ask when you’ll be getting your holiday back!

LeedsLoiner · 23/10/2025 09:14

Start phoning you boss late on Saturday or Sunday evenings or very early on Sunday morning just to ask trivial stuff.
Make sure you phone him at 6.00 a.m. this Sunday (assuming you're back at work on Monday) and ask "anything I need to be aware of for when I come back tomorrow?"

AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 23/10/2025 09:18

DisplayPurposesOnly · 23/10/2025 09:06

Hi boss, I'm on holiday so won't reply to any more messages. Unless the building has burned down, there's nothing that can't wait til I'm back.

If the building is on fire, they should contact the fire brigade, not OP!

Ellie1015 · 23/10/2025 09:20

I dont really mind being contacted on AL, but 8 times for such a non urgent issue, especially so early in the morning would absolutely not be ok and boss would loose any goodwill around me answering a quick urgent text while on AL.

I would mute/block work until you are back. When you are back I would raise it with boss to make sure it does not happen again.

Original poster
wetlettuce41 · 23/10/2025 09:23

So yesterday I did phone back, as I saw a few missed calls then I had a text from my colleague. I assumed it was something urgent because of that.

Now that I know it’s not… to have more calls at just a few minutes past 8 this morning when I’m in bed has really annoyed me. I’m usually up early as I have a long commute so was looking forward to being able to have a lie in!

I feel in a difficult position as the new boss has been making a point of reviewing mine and other peoples reasonable adjustments (I have a disability), and has made comments that he is needing to check if “people are working in the right place”. There has been at atmosphere since he came of the team feeling on edge. I’m worried if I push back it will make things worse at work for me.

OP posts:
Talltreesbythelake · 23/10/2025 09:23

I would contact HR to make them aware that you have had x number of contacts during annual leave and inquire whether this is a serious matter, should you cancel your leave and rebook it for later in the year? You might as well be in the office as you are not going to be relaxing tomorrow morning, are you?

DisplayPurposesOnly · 23/10/2025 09:24

AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 23/10/2025 09:18

If the building is on fire, they should contact the fire brigade, not OP!

Show quote history

Well yes, but it'd be helpful to know what the contingency plan is rather than turning up to a burnt building 😂

pinkfondu · 23/10/2025 09:25

Isn’t the public sector hot on bullying and discrimination?

Tamfs · 23/10/2025 09:26

wetlettuce41 · 23/10/2025 09:23

So yesterday I did phone back, as I saw a few missed calls then I had a text from my colleague. I assumed it was something urgent because of that.

Now that I know it’s not… to have more calls at just a few minutes past 8 this morning when I’m in bed has really annoyed me. I’m usually up early as I have a long commute so was looking forward to being able to have a lie in!

I feel in a difficult position as the new boss has been making a point of reviewing mine and other peoples reasonable adjustments (I have a disability), and has made comments that he is needing to check if “people are working in the right place”. There has been at atmosphere since he came of the team feeling on edge. I’m worried if I push back it will make things worse at work for me.

Oh that changes things a bit - I would absolutely be logging all this if he is on the dig for getting people out.

Doggymummar · 23/10/2025 09:27

I have my phone on do not disturb from 9pm to 9am generally. If I was on holiday I might extend those hours.

JurassicPark4Eva · 23/10/2025 09:31

"Morning John,

Could you put a placeholder on Teams / on my calendar for next week to sort this out when I'm back off AL?

Best, wetlettuce"

ChaToilLeam · 23/10/2025 09:32

That's really out of order. 3 people in my workplace have my personal number and they know it is only for dire emergencies, they absolutely respect that. If I see my own direct reports replying to emails when on holiday, I message them and tell them just to enjoy their break; get off the computer. Tell him you are ON LEAVE and will deal with any queries when you are back. What's your work policy on that, is there one?

Cardinalita90 · 23/10/2025 09:36

Clearly YANBU and I'm surprised he thinks 8am is an acceptable time to call anyone whether they're on leave or not! You need to set some boundaries or this will become the norm.

Wookiefiend · 23/10/2025 09:38

I'm happy to answer a genuinely urgent question on leave, but this would not be OK.

I'd send a message saying, I'm on leave, I'll deal with this when I'm back, please can we have a 121 then, to discuss these interruptions to my break.

Then set out what is OK/not OK for you. I don't look at any email etc when I'm off, but boss knows when something is genuinely urgent I will do what I can to help. She uses that maybe once or twice a year!