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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Can I have a hand hold please ?

93 replies

ByeByeThyroid · 21/10/2025 00:44

I had my thyroid surgery at 9am. I was in surgery for 7 hours, it was very difficult and stuck down to basically everything. I’ve also had a neck dissection where they have removed 40 lymph nodes because I have metastatic melanoma.

since 5pm on the ward my throat has been agony, I’ve also been ‘oozing’ fluid from the wound which I creasing pain. I’m on oxygen too. I have a drain with zero output

2 hours ago my lovely lovely nurse gave me iv paracetamol and asked the day ent if I could have my blood thinning injection, he said yes, went home and she gave it (God that mo fo burns)!

For 2 hours it has been really hard to get a deep breath or swallow, so I told the nurse and to her credit when she saw my buzzer go off she called the night ent guy and gave me some oramorph.

Night ENT dr has said I need an urgent new drain as the fluid is now building up in my wound, it’s also actively bleeding underneath the wound into my neck (because of the blood thinner).

I need to have some TXA (tranexamic acid) to help stop the bleeding, then a new drain but they want my air way protected so I have to go back to theatres for it as the swelling is a bit much, currently I have no dressing on to try and encourage as much of it to come out as possible whilst simultaneously not bleeding everywhere Oh and I need to walk around to try not to get a blood clot

All my people are asleep and I feel very alone and a bit scared. I’ve got my massive bag of fun shit that I packed and I’m very grateful for those suggestions!

OP posts:
Peridot1 · 22/10/2025 02:48

Wow you poor thing. You really have been through it. It sounds pretty scary and traumatic. Hope you start to recover now.

gggrrrargh · 22/10/2025 02:54

Oh wow it’s all been very traumatic. I hope you’re able to get some sleep in these circumstances. Hand hold from me too.

MarxistMags · 22/10/2025 03:04

Awww, here's a hand for you, in fact 2 hands. I just had the RAI for my thyroid. I was lucky.
Get well soon.

PennyRest · 22/10/2025 04:03

Oh you poor thing, that sounds awful! I hope you are at least more comfortable now x

Allaboutthegirliguess · 22/10/2025 04:11

Only just seen this post. And wanted to add my best wishes for all you've been going through. Really hope.theyve got to the bottom of the cause.

That is is so much to go through. Sounds like they are doing everything they can.

Big hugs

Garamousalata · 22/10/2025 04:16

You poor thing, that all sounds horrible for you. Sending love,mhugs and a handhold. ❤️‍🩹xx

Coffeetostart · 22/10/2025 04:30

Big big hugs and a hand hold, you have really have been through an awful ordeal. I hope you get the best of care (pain relief too) to speed up your recovery. ❤️

DrowningInSyrup · 22/10/2025 04:51

Huge handhold. You're a very brave lady, that sounds like an awful lot to go through in 12 hrs. Keep us updated and I hope everything is much better for you this morning x

Veronicasharmonica · 22/10/2025 05:05

Oh lovely… you’ve been through the mill and then some. Sending middle-of-the-night hugs and handhold x

ByeByeThyroid · 22/10/2025 05:13

Managed to stay out of theatre for the rest of the night. They think it may have been an extreme reaction to surgery ? I’m staying in hdu and DH is coming in before work. I feel really bad that I didn’t have chance to tell him I was having surgery again until the surgeon called him to say I was out of surgery and safe in hdu.

OP posts:
Figcherry · 22/10/2025 05:35

Big hugs and a handhold for both you and your dh.
Hope everything settles down now and you can get some proper rest.

Clutchball · 22/10/2025 05:46

I’m so sorry you’re going through so much, your body (and mind!) must be exhausted.

Ramona748 · 22/10/2025 05:59

Sending an early morning handhold, you are really going through a rough time. Hope you can get some sleep 💐

LeftieRightsHoarder · 22/10/2025 06:24

Sending love and sympathy, OP. My friend had a bad few days in hospital earlier this year, but as soon as they removed her thyroid the improvement in her health was amazing. I hope your results are equally good xx

MyDeftDuck · 22/10/2025 06:28

Sending lots of love and hugs and hope you are much more comfortable this morning 💐❤️

Soonenough · 22/10/2025 06:41

Sounds like you've had an̈ unexpectedly tough time . But they seem to be able to react to the situation rapidly . It must be very frightening for you and the pain sounds horrendous. I think you seem very calm and brave . Hope things improve and you can begin to recover .

Whatsthatsheila · 22/10/2025 07:15

ByeByeThyroid · 22/10/2025 05:13

Managed to stay out of theatre for the rest of the night. They think it may have been an extreme reaction to surgery ? I’m staying in hdu and DH is coming in before work. I feel really bad that I didn’t have chance to tell him I was having surgery again until the surgeon called him to say I was out of surgery and safe in hdu.

Shush yourself - don’t feel bad. You are out of it and you can tell him how much you love him now.

don’t really have much else to say - just that clearly we all see you and we are rooting for you. It sounds like you are in an amazing hospital that are super responsive make sure they’re assessing for and adding mechanical VTE prophylaxis (if needed) since you seem to be a bit ropey for the pharmaceutical one and continue to self advocate. If it doesn’t feel right make sure they check it assess it and sort it.

and take all the pain meds you need if prn isn’t enough ask them to add a low dose of a reg med for a couple of days til it starts settling - throat surgery sucks big time.

limetrees32 · 22/10/2025 07:36

Good lord , you poor thing!!
I have no words , except how brave you sound so sending
FlowersDaffodilFlowersDaffodilFlowers

NautilusLionfish · 22/10/2025 09:11

Gosh @ByeByeThyroid , you are going through a lot. Hand holding you for the South East. Sending you hugs, luck and sending a prayer for your healing.

Hopefully now they have figured out about your sensitivities, they everything under control

27pilates · 22/10/2025 10:28

Handhold OP. Very frightening and you’re being very brave. Wishing you strength and prayers xx

ByeByeThyroid · 22/10/2025 10:39

So I think I have a diagnosis, sepsis induced DIC, basically got an infection either before or just after surgery and my body has gone ‘let’s make a clot’ so it made a really
good clot or lots of tiny little clots in tiny blood vessels and then didn’t have the ability to make any more clots at all and I just haemorrhaged everywhere, eyes, nose gums everywhere and specifically into my none working wound drain in my neck compressing my air way. I had so much ffp, blood, and platelets. I think I had about 20 bags? I’m the only patient
awake in icu and everyone seems surprised I’m awake and talking

honestly compared to yesterday I feel like a new woman (apart from the arterial line in my neck and entirely new blood system) I actually work in the hospital I’m in and one of my colleagues said she worked the major haemorrhage last night .. yeah that would be me!!

OP posts:
Givenupshopping · 22/10/2025 10:50

OMG! There was I yesterday thinking that after going back into surgery the first time you were on your way to recovery, and since then you've been through so much, you really are one strong lady to have survived all that. Sending you my very best wishes, and hopes that from now on things will start to improve.

gggrrrargh · 22/10/2025 10:56

Wow that’s so much to deal with. Glad you’re feeling better despite all that trauma!

AutumnCosy2025 · 22/10/2025 19:57

Fucking hell! Sorry but that's scary!!!

How are you feeling now??

id be a bloody basket case after that.

SpotHaven · 22/10/2025 20:04

Wow. What an ordeal. You poor thing. Sending love and strength x

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