Time off work when your dog passes

[Arabiannights01]

I just think that I love my dog more than most humans and when it is her time to leave, I will be a distraught- mess for a while, I don’t think work will want a sobbing mess in front of customers. There should be a system where you get some kind of compassionate leave imo.

It's almost like we're all different isn't it?!

@MaplePumpkin you are entitled to feel how you feel. For some people their pets are their absolute world, and it is understandable that you would struggle to stand in front of a class full of pupils when your lovely cat dies.

My BFF lost her dog some months ago, and she was upset, but her husband was devastated, as he was so close to her (the dog!) and she always sat on his lap, and he took her for walks most of the time. He said he was more upset when their dog died, than he was when his grandfather died earlier in the year. He had 3 days off work, + the weekend (so 5 in total.) He took it as leave. When he went back to work, he barely spoke to anyone for a week, as he was still upset.

Everyone's feelings are valid. And it's a bit sanctimonious to say 'well I would never dream of taking a day off.' You wouldn't? Good for you. Some others would need to! And please don't try and tell me that teachers can't possibly have time off/never have time off. 🙄 I lost count of the amount of times my DC had a substitute teacher because theirs had rung in sick.

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I am so glad I am no longer an employer.

Yes, take annual leave or unpaid leave but I would not want to pay for people to take time off for dog deaths. I really wouldn’t.

And in the end all this absence, for anxiety, not having slept, a myriad of mental health upsets, and numerous other ‘reasons’ frequently cited on MN as reasons to stay at home all has to be paid for somehow.

It raises costs of prices and services.

If somebody in my team was so upset about the death of a pet that they really couldn't do their job then I'd let them take a day or two outside of annual leave, but I have to admit it would be with a degree of eye-rolling. I wouldn't if they then got another pet and that one died though - if you know you're going to be that cut up about the death of a pet then don't get one; you know they're almost certain to die before you. As so many others have said allowing it as of right would just be a pisstakers' charter.

Pretty disrespectful @Biskieboo to admit you would be eye rolling. You've clearly never had a bond with an animal but a little compassion would go a long way. To have the attitude "if you know you're going to be that cut up don't get another pet" is quite sad. It took us three years to feel ready for another dog after our last loss, but we got a puppy last year. The joy they bring is indescribable.

Annual leave is enough for a pet.

Nobody has said teachers can't take time off sick. Of course they do. What they cannot do is take a leave of absence bar very particular circumstances. Supply staff are expensive, often not great and we get a lot of parental complaints. So, no, a teacher would be very unlikely to be allowed to have time off for the death of a pet..

Thank you so much for this - I really appreciate it and agree with every word you said!

I really understand the grandfather thing as well, I see my cat every day, spend so much time with her and would miss her so much. Losing her would affect my day to day life more than losing a grandparent!

While I agree that having specific time off for the loss of a pet could open a massive can of worms (multiple pets, where does it stop?!), I also think that if you're unfit to work due to being a sobbing mess then you shouldn't be at work - annual leave or unpaid leave probably appropriate in that situation.

When I lost my horse I sobbed for days, luckily I was on annual leave anyway but it was awful and I couldn't have been at work. Similarly when my lovely dog who I'd had for 15 years died I was dreadfully upset. I work as a scrub nurse so I couldn't exactly scrub in for an operation if I couldn't stop crying!

It's not "just a dog/cat/horse whatever".

But I don’t have or want any pets, so why should you get time off when a dog dies when I can’t get compassionate leave if my step-mum dies?

I worked with a woman who took 2 weeks off when her dog died. She claimed losing her dog was exactly the same as when my dad died. She didn’t like it when I pointed out that it was totally different, not least that I’d never get another Dad but she’d get another dog in a few weeks. Which she did!

I’m not doubting you’ll be sad when your dog dies, but that’s what annual leave is for.

To be fair I get it. Dogs are like family and for many, a lot closer than human family.

There are dog owners and "dog people" and you can tell the difference in the comments. 🙄

My answer, and in my experience it's been compassionate leave, firstly.... maybe a couple of days if your employer isn't a complete arsehole.

If it's worse and you're depressed or something, that's sick leave but I wouldn't like to take it on those terms.

Otherwise you are into annual leave, but yes compassionate leave should include pets.

The problem is, as ever, some people will take the complete piss.

When my soul dog passed my lovely company let me take personal leave with the proviso that I made the time up when they were short staffed. It can be done if they want to.

I think you should absolutely be able to take the time, annual leave, make the time up, unpaid leave or even sick if you’re in such a mess you can’t work - but I don’t think you can expect employers to start paying you. I’ve lost 2 pets this year and have 2 elderly dogs as well as several other pets, I will use leave/time owing or unpaid if needed

I have 2 dogs, I love them dearly, but I wouldn't expect time off when they go. Use your holiday ffs

I agree kind of, I mean to some people their dogs are their babies but where would it end? Oh I want to take 3 days off paid because my fish or hamster died? How would work in that case? Work can’t prove how much you did or didn’t adore your pet. It’s a system that would be abused

Presumably those in the company who don't have a pet would be allowed a similar number of days off each year was well?

A relative of mine was signed off for two weeks when their dog died. I do think that’s a bit much.

Problem is, people take the piss. So Jenny will say her dogs died when she doesn’t have a dog. Then Sarah will complain because Jenny got extra days off for her non existent dog and why is Jenny’s non existent dog more important than her real life rabbit.

God there are some heartless people here who clearly don’t understand the bond some people have with their pets.

Thankfully I work at a company that actually cares about their employees and their wellbeing. In the last year, 2 of my colleagues have lost their beloved dogs and been given a few days compassionate leave to deal with it. They were also amazing to me when a family member (not immediate family but we were very close) got very sick and died, telling me to take as much paid time off as I needed.

There are dog owners and "dog people" and you can tell the difference in the comments. 🙄

Absolute codswallop! There are people with some resilience and people who want a state funeral when their pet hamster dies - this lack of resilience will show beyond the scenario of losing a pet. Honestly people need to get a grip. We all loved and mourn our lost pets and lack of resilience is not a measure of how much someone loved their pet.

That's an amazing workplace. I think nobody doubts the love for one's pet, but it's the statutory leave which people are questioning. I don't know what line of work you're in, but for most of us that would be absolutely impossible.

🤙 Seems straight forward to me….if a loving pet dies, dog, cat, beetle….whatever…… you take AL if you can’t face work. If you have no AL left then you have to take unpaid leave. Something like this is purely down to employers/manager’s discretion……nothing to do with legislation, how ridiculous!

Everyone's different. Everyone's grief is different.

I found not telling colleagues that our dog had died helped me carry on as normal, even though I was heartbroken.

I think it’s appropriate to take annual or unpaid leave if you’re too upset to work. But I also think it’s an occasion to simply pull yourself together and fall apart outside of working hours.

Where do you draw the line? Dogs…cats…horse…

My pets are tarantulas. They have a lifespan longer than most cats and dogs, and I adore them. But I doubt anyone will give the death of my tarantulas much credence for having time off! I have a disabled tarantula who I know will die young, and I’ll be heartbroken when she does because she’s a fighter and I’ve put so much care into giving her a good life within her limits. But I won’t be asking for time off. It’s not realistic.

Absolutely ridiculous. I was back at work within a couple of days of my mum dying. I was single and going back to an empty house after work . It was the best thing to do . I had done all I could for my wee mum, now I had to get on with life. Keep annual leave or request unpaid leave. Time is money. You will grieve for your pet whether your at work or at home. You may as well work and keep yourself busy and distracted. Not to mention earning your keep.

I manage a large team. I’ve always had the view if you’re too upset to work then you’re too upset to work. Regardless of the reason for the upset / distress / illness. I have always treated this as sick leave.