To think my boyfriend should be more understanding that I’m ill?

[Juliee86]

I’ve had awful vomiting and diarrhoea since yesterday, I’ve not felt this unwell for a long time. I’ve been at my boyfriend’s flat since Friday, and said to him when I started feeling unwell that I was happy to go back to mine so he didn’t catch anything. He was adamant he was happy for me to stay.

This morning led in bed, I misjudged and there was a small mess on the sheet. He went mental and called me a dirty bitch and said I’d need to clean it straight away.

I was really taken aback and upset, he apologised not long after but I said I wasn’t comfortable staying any longer so went home.

If your partner is ill then you shouldn’t react like this surely?

No, he shouldn’t have acted like this. It could easily have been him. If he has caught it and has the same experience, that might benefit him.

You shit the bed?

He is appalling but you won’t leave and this will stagger on and you’re probably have children with him and it will be an absolutely torrid mess

Dump him. He’s horrible.

He is showing you exactly who he is. Unkind if you don't function as normal.

I read it that you accidentally sicked up on the bed, Either way, he is awful. If you were my friend I would be advising you to reconsider this relationship.

I would be pretty grossed out by someone pooing in the bed. Did you not have knickers and pyjamas on?

Regardless, you should have prioritised your own wellbeing and gone home. It’s always easier having stomach problems in your own
home.

I’d also take this opportunity to assess whether you want to stay with someone like this.

I wouldn't ever shame someone for messing the bed or themselves if they have a bug, it could literally happen to any and everyone at some point.

I don't do sympathy for people that drink themselves to vomiting however.

This isn't a person you can trust op, he is cruel.

After any time you’ve had an upset stomach, vomiting, diarrhea, never ever ever trust a fart

Oh you poor thing. That must have been embarrassing and upsetting. Did he think you’d done it on purpose? In your shoes I’d think hard about this relationship. If he’s like this now what will he be like in the future? Do you ever stain the sheet with your period blood? What would he make of that?

One day the tables might turn and he might have an “accident.” Illness can throw any of us a curved ball. This I know when I had to wash someone’s PJ’s sent home from hospital. I had no idea they were heavily poo soiled until I tipped them out of the hospital bag. Nobody warned me & nurses hadn’t contained them into a separate bag so everything was contaminated!

Frankly I’d dump him. He’s harsh and has no empathy or tolerance. It’s a personality trait I doubt will, improve.

He’s a horrible cunt and is showing you how future him will be if you get a long term illness or can’t serve the purpose he requires.
Yes it is probably a bit yuck but as a loving partner you’d be supportive and reassuring. How old is he calling you a ‘dirty bitch’ ffs
i hope he catches it and shits himself in Tesco

I’ve learnt that now. If wasn’t alcohol induced, just out of nowhere

Good you’re home. Has he contacted you at all?

At least you know he’s not someone you want to have children with.

I hope you feel better soon.

Anyone who punishes you for bodily functions is not a nice person. Someone who gets angry at you when your functions aren't even under your full control is beyond contempt.

💯

Also worrying that OP needs to double check this is unacceptable. Just LTB.

I’d be grossed out too but I’d be a fucking ADULT about it, and not be an utter cunt and make the person feel embarrassed, ashamed or worse than they probably already feel.

Well he has shown you who he is

Friend had food poisoning with her new bf. He cleaned her up, remade bed, held her hair while sick etc. She married him 6 minths later as he had shown her he was a man who cared.

I would no longer want anything to do with someone who called me a bitch, with or without the addition of ‘dirty’.

OP, if someone calls you a ‘dirty bitch’, please dump them immediately. Do not ever feel the need to seek second opinions on that. This is a horrible man.

Before your ‘accident’ how was he treating you?

It was totally beyond your control and he’s treated you pretty despicably, I think.

This would be a good time to assess the relationship…

this happened to me not once but twice. Both times DP was calm and unbothered and offered to help clean up (but also left the room at my request as I was so embarrassed). I could list a lot of things my DP does that wind me up or cause issues with us but that’s not one of them, because it would be cruel and unfair.

They don’t live together. He’s just a boyfriend 🙄

She didn’t say they did live together

It's vile that he called you a dirty bitch. Any bloke that said that would never be spoken to again by me.

Obviously you were going to clean it up and he should've been much kinder.

Please chuck the horrible prick.

Well she did ask him if she should go home and he persuaded her to stay at his place! 🙄

You poor thing OP how unkind of him. I'd never feel comfortable around him again. I hope you feel better soon x