Jam sandwiches at wraparound care

[JBeanGarden]

My reception age DD goes to a really well arranged breakfast club and after school club 4 days a week. It works very well with 2 commuting parents. I only have one gripe and that is with the food they offer. Technically the food should align with the school’s healthy eating policy, as it’s run by the school not an external provider. The school has asked parents not to provide sweet treats in lunch boxes and it’s quite strict about sandwiches.

HOWEVER the school is not transparent about the wraparound food offer and I had to email three times to get them to tell me what they provide. Once they did, they disclosed that the after school options include a range of sandwiches, including jam, plus a pudding of cake and fruit. Of course, my four-year-old always goes for a jam sandwich and ends up with a very sweet tea 4 days a week. The school says they offer carrot sticks etc, however, not one single parent has ever mentioned this in conversation and so I just think it’s something they say but don’t provide.

We do talk at home about the importance of a balanced diet, but she’s still only four and temptation is there! She’s offered something a bit more nutritionally balanced she gets home, but she’s usually just full of jam sandwich!

I emailed the school to ask them if they are able to comment on this or if they ever review the food that they provide at wraparound care, but I haven’t received a reply. AIBU to push this further?

Quite.

After school care is a) optional and b) not part of the school day.

And yes, of course parents should prepare healthy options for their children, that's a basic part of being a parent. Regardless of how "important" their jobs are.

Stop being silly now.

Thank you for your input.

Eating jam sandwiches four times a week is surely better than processed ham which has been proven to cause colon cancer. In my mind if she’s choosing jam over ham then that is the healthy choice, at least you can balance out the sugar with a healthy, savoury tea and not giving many sugary treats the rest of the week. Much harder to balance out the long term effects of eating processed meat!

After school care may be optional but it's an important part of enabling women to work - and yes, it is usually women who have to deal with a lack of ASC.

It’s a smear of fruit and sugar, won’t do any harm at all. I’d make sure my dc was still getting a hot meal at home though. A sandwich isn’t tea

Whatever about the contradiction, I wouldn't go to war over that. I wouldn't want dd eating jam sandwiches either (her teeth!😬) so I'd send in what I would like her to eat or ask that her sandwich not be jam. Simple.

Eh? I’ve not discussed whether the hours are any good? I’ve genuinely got no idea if you intended that reply for me or not. I’m also unsure where I mentioned anybodies pension - what on earth has that got to do with a jam sandwich!?
OP made a stuck up comment about the parenting/food given by parents of British parents and, understandably, got some backs up. Do you get a jam sandwich for all of your big reaches?

I agree they should and I’d love to see some of the prices for healthy options come down to be honest, and whilst the odd jam sandwich isn’t the end of the world it would be nice if parents once in a while had the option to provide the something quick and easy rather than knowing the school has already done that.

And your kid won't have lifelong health issues because they eat a few jam sandwiches after school.

It's probably not convenience but necessitated by budgetary restraints.

But parents can still provide something quick and easy - there are tons of quick, healthy options out there.

Yes this!!!! You are potentially setting her up for a lifetime of food issues - it’s one thing gently trying to educate, but at age 4???!!

I am speaking from experience. I have had food issues all my life since being taught about the ‘importance of a balanced diet’ at an early age. Please don’t do this to her so early in life.

It is the parents job no one else's no matter how people try and justify it 'my job is really really important' doesn't change it

But a jam and butter sandwich is also the norm in France? Or a pain au chocolat?

That’s what we always had as the goûter and France is quite known for paying attention to their food. Or in my home country I bread with ham or cheese or marmalade.

What meals does she have in an average day?

Surely the OP is asking if the double standards here are unreasonable? That a paid for service that is required to follow school policy, contradicts what the school tells parents to do? In which case, no, YANBU.

Ham is well known even by the NHS it is a cause of cancer. It's also processed of pigs eyes and arses.
I'd go for the jam. No matter how much you try to restrict your child of sugar and sweets, they will eventually eat it anyway later in life. It's also proven the more you restrict certain foods the more likely they will end up having worse eating habits later.

I would give my child a jam sandwich over a ham sandwich every day of the week 😳

And your bar is unfeasibly high. Not high enough to exclude ham (carcinogenic) and cheese (saturated fat, salt), though. And if you say the amounts we’re talking about are too low to damage children’s health, and fine within a balanced diet, the same applies to jam.

I wouldn’t particularly like the thought of my 5 year old DS having jam sandwiches every day but if you have to use the kids club due to work commitments then it is what it is. 🤷🏼‍♀️ having ham every day most definitely wouldn’t be better so I’m not sure why you’d prefer that.

She’s not full from all the jam. That’ll be the bread.
You can’t decide to close threads on here btw. It’ll run and run if you say that just because 😀

What “nasty” chemicals are you seeing in diabetic jam??

Everything is a chemical. I used to have a picture of a fresh strawberry with a list of its "ingredients" - would make weedkiller look beneficial if you assume every scientific name is sinister.

It's not a double-standard - after school care is not part of the school day and doesn't have to follow the same regulations.

If it’s cheap jam the % of fruit in it is likely very low. Even if they offered some carrot sticks and cucumber alongside it would be something. I don’t think it’s a battle you will win with the school though. I think maybe send in her after school snack.

Most of the children and young people i have worked with with eating disorders, had parents that were food obsessed themselves. One even weighed every single meal even in the hospital.

This over focus on healthy diet, carcinogenic this, UPF, ‘chemicals’ and restriction will just create another generation of children with eating disorders. I’m not saying we shouldn’t be eating a nutritious diet with whole food blah blah. I do but if i fancy a bag of crisps i have them. It’s balance. Which most qualified dietician/people with actual nutrition qualifications advocate. High nutritious whole food diet with a small amount of what you fancy.

It’s a tiny bit of Jam and some bread, a four year old that’s been very busy in reception and then has to stay even later for after school care. It’s a long day and of course she will be hungry at that point. She’s four and hungry!! It’s not crack cocaine.

Just send in what you prefer.