Inheritance

[realsavagelike]

Inspired by a currently active thread, surely there must be some MNetters out there who haven't inherited anything from grandparents or parents? DF is still alive - I'm pretty sure DM, who passed away a couple of years ago, left everything to him, and I'm not holding out for any inheritance from DF as I feel it is safer to assume any assets could well be eaten up by care home fees or any unexpected events. I inherited nothing from any grandparents. Yes, you bet I am jealous of those who have been more fortunate than I in this area! Is it just a Mumsnet thing where people expect to, or have received, an inheritance?

I did not assume that I would get an inheritance and worked hard during my 50s once my children had flown the nest to build up my own retirement savings. I was aware how much money Mum had, my father died 30 years previously, as I had POA and needed to sort her finances out once Mum developed Alzheimer’s. She was 87 when she had to move into a care home so perhaps I should have realised that her savings, pensions and rental income from her house were more than enough to last for years - far longer than her life expectancy.

She died just before her 90th birthday and we were then able to sell her house and work out probate etc. There were four siblings but even so, I inherited a decent amount as the area she had lived in for over 60 years had become very trendy and house prices were very high. I didn’t need the money, my own savings and pensions provided me with a vert decent lifestyle so I am just about ready to do a deed of variance to gift most of it to my children. They are all in their late 30s/early 40s so the money will really help them out now rather than later on when I pop off.

My sister and I inherited from our mum. It was about £100k each. DH had got maybe £600k from his dad but has fallen out with his siblings in the process.

I'd be interested to see where you got that figure from.

The current figures for those that go into care are nothing like that.

Today, if you are currently aged 65, then you can expect to live to 87.5 on average if you're a woman and 85 if you're a man (source ONS).

Of women aged 80-84 there are 3.9% in care homes, but this does more than double to 8.7% for those aged 85-89.

(the figure does rise dramatically for those aged 90+. The figure is 21%, so if you live past 90 you have a one in five chance of ending up in a care home, but a four out of five chance of not being in a care home)

The comparable figures for men are 2.4% for those aged 80-84 and 4.6% for those aged 85-89. So, only one man in twenty aged 85-89 is in a care home (and the average age of death for men is 83).

(source ONS)

So, take 100 women aged 65. Very few indeed will be in care homes before the age of 80. The ONS figures show that out of these 100 women aged 65 then 2.5 will be in a care home before they get to their 80th birthday.

The ONS says that 76 of them will make it to their 80th birthday. Then 59 will make it to their 85th birthday. So, that's an average of 69.7 women at each year between the ages of 80 and 84.

The figures say that 3.9% of those are in care homes, so that is 2.7 women on average in a care home.

Then from having 59 women alive at the age of 85 this falls to 35.8 by the age of 90 and there is an average of 49.9 women alive between the ages of 85 and 89.

The figures say that 8.7% of those women are in care, so that is 4.3 women.

For the 35.8 women that get to the age of 90 and beyond, the figures say that 21% of them will be in a care home, that is 7.5 women.

So, out of a total of 100 women aged 65 today, the figures suggest that 2.5+2.7+4.3+7.5 = 17 women will go into a care home.
.

The similar figures for men are quite a bit lower, partly because many fewer men go into care and also because they don't live as long:

Take 100 men aged 65 today. Of those, 2.3 will go into care homes before they are 80.

67 of them will make it to their 80th birthday and 47 will make it to their 85th birthday.

Of these, 2.4% or 1.4 men are in care.

From those 47 men at age 85, 24.5 will make it to their 90th birthday.

Of these men 4.6%, or 1.7 men, are in care.

For the 24.5 men who make it past 90 then 10.1% or 2.7 men are in care homes.

So, for 100 men aged 65 today then there will be 2.3+1.4+1.7+2.7= 8.1 men who go into care homes.

Overall, for every 100 men who are 65 there are 105 women.

So, combining the mens and womens figures gives an average of 12.7 people out of every 100 who are alive at the age of 65 who will go into care homes.

I've inherited 200k. It's stuck in an account. I'd rather have.my mum back

I'm just wish my parents had lived long enough to spend their money on care home fees. Sadly I inherited everything early as they passed away in an accident when I was 25.

I inherited from my parent 10 years ago , back then their house sold for £220.0000 .
Weirdly , it still doesn't feel like my money and sits mainly untouched a decade later .
I suppose it's a good thing it's not been frittered away ( don't want to move , mortgage paid off , never felt the need for a new car etc )

You’re not alone OP. Have never received a penny and won’t receive anything in the future. Same goes for DH.

’Most’ is not ‘everyone’. And a house is not the only thing you can inherit.

But conversely just because there has been a loss it doesn't mean there has been an inheritance.

Totally understandable that many would rather a loved one around than not but there are many that have no loved one and no inheritance.

I'm mid 50s, born to older parents. There was only one GP alive when I was born, and they lived in a council house and Ieft nothing when they died when I was 11.
I am an only child, my dad died in 2008, left everything to mum, who is 90 next year. She lives in a small shared ownership property in the village I live in. She still goes on holiday with friends and is very independent.
I'm aware of what's in the bank/savings and have POA. I hope she continues to enjoy life, and spends whatever she needs to in order to be able to do this

ive never inherited from grandparents. On both sides they left (the little they had) to their children. In my mother’s case when her mother passed the family home, which was in a working class area was sold and the proceeds divided between her and her 8 siblings. I think they got about 20K each. Same situation with DH

Ill inherit half of my mothers home when she passes, hopefully many years from now. I’m in Ireland which has the fair deal scheme so even if she requires a care home, I know only a fixed percentage will be eligible toward her care. My DH won’t inherit any of his parents house and were fine with that. His sister still lives in the family home. She assists his parents day to day and while they’re in good health now realistically if the day comes they need extra care, a lot of it will fall to her. They worried what would happen when they pass away and that SIL could be left homeless so DH and his siblings got them to leave the house to her in their will.

More than half the population expect to inherit in the next 20 years https://www.ftadviser.com/family-law/2025/5/23/nearly-23mn-uk-adults-depend-on-an-inheritance-/

Depends what you count as an inheritance. Neither of us received much.

We've given our kid a lot already, more people pass on money while alive now. ifamagazine.com/where-in-the-uk-do-adult-children-receive-the-most-help-from-the-bank-of-mum-dad/

In 2000, my brother died and DSs were stunned to hear he had left them each £100,000 and twice that to me. It helped DSs on the housing trail.
They were very lucky and very grateful. I remember getting the solicitor’s letter and ringing DSs to tell them. Amazement and gratitude.

I’m 48 and haven’t inherited anything, my husband is 55 and also hasn’t. Our parents are in good health, I am sure there will
be some inheritance when they pass but hopefully not for a long time yet. We have worked hard and are financially set up
ourselves so it’s not something I ever really think about, I would be more than happy if it skipped our generation and went directly to the grandkids (there’s 16 of them across both sides of the family). My children stand to inherit very well from us

I might get something if it doesn't all go on care for my mother (and I'd be happier if she was in a care home rather that struggling on by herself in the old family home as she is at present).

But we're a long lived family, and by the time I got anything I'm likely be in my 70's with no-one else close down a generation to leave it to....

No one who could sign a passport? Really? Have you read the requirements?

Nowt here. Grandparents had 9 and 8 dcs respectively and did not own their own homes. My parents died before house price inflation leaving very little, and the pil both got dementia. They galloped through in turn £600k in care home fees. When fil died he was under the £23k threshhold, but he had left instructions for a very costly funeral which dh&siblings honoured - so basically about £1k was left which paid for a big family meal.

I always joke the only think I am likely to inherit from my parents is debt . Luckily I am financially more stable than they ever have been.

& the above (I think) assumes that those in care homes at 80/85 are different people to those in care homes at 90 (which they may be but equally may not be)

I got high blood pressure. It’s the same as a load of money isn’t it?

This. I won’t inherit anything but I’ll still see my DM die.

Those saying they don’t want to pay for their own care - who do they think should pay for it?

Be worth getting some photo ID then

Can be chicken and egg if you need to pay to get it / no driving lisence ? Passeport or a notary to sign your ID isn’t cheap

I received £1k from my grandmother and £65k from my dad. I would have preferred to keep dad obviously as he died young.

Just had a 6 figure inheritance from my father who passed away recently. DF & DM spent their entire lives being careful with their money. Took every opportunity to tell me what they had even on the occasions where i was struggling to buy food for my household. Never bought birthday or christmas presents for their children or grandchildren. TBH After 16 we never really had much of a relationship at all. There were a few bits of money more recently which were appreciated but didnt in any way make up for lack of contact imo.

I wanted my inheritance as, in my eyes it was the pay off for the lack of family for the last 35 years. If thats cold then so be it.

Give my DF his dues, over his dead body was he going in a home. He fought every illness to the end and every second he spent in hospital was a second too much in his eyes. He signed himself out multiple times against the doctors wishes. He was abusive to nurses and even though he shouldnt have been sent home, they couldnt overide his wishes.

Last couple of months we got him private healthcare at home and he passed away relatively peacefully, dosed up on morphine.

TBH i will not be like my DF but i totally understand the battle he had for the last 12 months to ensure his money wasnt swallowed up. I would probably do the same.