To think martial arts is out because of forward roll fear?

[TaylorWift]

DS 13.
I really want him to learn a martial art.
He is shy, sensitive, quiet, and his self esteem is ok but very easily knocked for a number of reasons too detailed to go in to here. He had amazing self esteem as a young child, but I've watched this get knocked since the age of 10 due to a series of different things that happened to him. Obviously im working hard all the time to rebuild it, but bottom line is his view of the world and the people in it has been turned upside down over recent years and his self confidence is now low.
Anyway, big bullying incident at school a few of months back. Led to the bully being permanently excluded.
DS isn't confident in a sporty way, unfortunately. He's always refused to join any sports clubs that involve higher levels of competitiveness, i.e. football.
I feel like I need to get him in to martial arts. Not only to teach him self defense but also to make him carry himself confidently and to give off an air about him that shows he's not an easy target.
I chatted to him and he's open to it.
So I've had a long phone conversation with a local martial arts trainer who was great and really helpful and he talked at length about the philosophy behind martial arts. I told him all about DS and he said martial arts would be great for his self confidence. I could hear his passion for it. But then, as soon as I said DS can't do a forward roll, or a head over heels as I used to call it as a kid, he straight up said DS won't be able to join his class until he can do one.
But DS literally cannot do a forward roll. And I don't mean he can't. Can't, and won't practice. He also cannot dive. In his swim lessons, he can't go up to the next stage because he can't dive.
He has tried to dive and tried to do forward rolls but he can't do them.
He says he cannot do anything where his head has to go forward and down under the rest of his body and then for his body to follow over his upside down head. I don't know if I'm explaining this properly 🤦‍♀️
So is that it? Is DS blocked out of learning a martial art because he can't do forward rolls?
I'd really love advice from anyone who foes martial art, or whose DC do, who might know about this?

Sorry - which one do you practice?

Can you tell I'm passionate about it! 😁

Wado Ryu Karate

I'm a 3rd Dan in karate and have had my own club since 2016 and been training for years. I dont demand my students do anything they're not ready for.

We'll do shoulder rolls and break falls etc, but with support, and if a student really cant or d[isn't want to do it that's fine. There are plenty of other things they can do.

Sounds to me like you need to find a different class. If karate is your desire, you need to find a more traditional club as opposed to a "sports" club.

Another one that is good similar is Tang Soo Do. Chuck Norris is an expert in that.

I'm so glad I posted here! So many helpful replies, thank you!

@TaylorWift YABU and being ridiculous.

It is ONE club that has a requirement that he doesn't meet.

Martial arts is about finding the right club for you.

We started MA with a large franchise with a blue and red logo and disovered it was very money orientated. Pay to progress and they passed anyone who paid. We then moved to another club and 5 years later we are still there. A much better club for my autistic son. I train with my kids in a family class.

Just check out some more local clubs. Avoid any that have big grading fees and only teach certain kicks/punches per belt level. I'd also perhaps avoid some of the clubs that are way too serious like the one you have already approached- they're not the most inclusive. Lead instructors should also have 10+ years experience and black belt +!! At some of the franchises, we discovered some of their instructors had only been doing MA for a year!

Keep looking and you'll find the right club.

I’m a karate instructor and I’ve never done a forward roll!

It’s a great thing for kids to get into for discipline, self confidence and general fitness. I would suggest you pick a traditional karate club because it’s not all about sparring. A good club will introduce your son to that in a safe way. When we spar, we are looking to make contact with our partner but not to hurt them. When you take your black belt grading there’s a part of the grading where you are expected to demonstrate proper control.

I do Shotokan and if you like the sound of traditional karate I can suggest associations if you want. We are in a traditional association, with visits from Japanese instructors a few times a year.

DS is 12 and has been doing taekwondo since he was 5. They’ve a class for smaller ones age 4-7 then after that it’s for people of all ages. The style they do is ITF - international taekwondo federation - which I think is the more popular one in the UK, and he’s never done a forward roll and can’t do them to save his life.

they start off on a white belt and work there way up through yellow, green, blue etc but between each main colour belt there’s different colour stripes. It generally not until they’re much higher up the belt order that they’ll do contact sparring and it’s with the full head gear, mouth guard, shin pads, gloves, feet protectors etc before they do.

it’s developed his confidence massively, he’s made some really good friends and been brilliant for self defence techniques.

if you’re Leeds based or nearby let me know.

Like someone else said, go to a few clubs, see how they're run. Find one that he feels comfortable with and go from there.

I do goju-ryu karate, brown belt, as an adult. Some of us have sports injuries or health conditions. Forward rolls are one six-weekly exercise among many, and one I can't do. The (highly-qualified) instructors learn our individual limitations and often call us out before we bow out ourselves. Commitment and respect are valued above brute strength and pigheadedness. All ages train in close proximity, and have the same consideration. Find the right dojo.

I used to do MMA and kickboxing and while some people did forward rolls to be honest it was never a requirement nor did I do one in 4 years.

Find a different class! I

I did kickboxing. Never did a forward roll.

What about police or fire cadets?

DS does karate. No forward rolls involved there. It’s also a very inclusive and supportive martial arts academy.

learn at your own pace, spar if you want to, but not forced to. Sounds just up your DS’ street. If you are near LS24 I’ll give you the details! X

I think when it comes to clubs at age 13, it's all about trying them out. Go at normal training time and watch for a bit. You can see the age range attending, how the instructor interacts with the trainees and how class is structured. If your DS likes what he sees ask for a taster session- my DC's martil arts club did 3 free lessons...

I would also have another look at cadets. My DS loves going, they do a lot more than just polishing boots. He's been to summer acivity camp (rock climbing, mountain biking...) , has done an extensive first aid course and been to air shows - both helping out and as visitor. They even organise a yearly careers fair with local companies as well as the Forces and other uniform services (ambulance & fire) for GCSE & Level students.
He's made some lovely friends that he meets up with outside cadets as well. And yes, he will wash & iron his clothes as well as polish his boots before the goes.

This might be a bit left field but you mention he has been into drama, what about street dance if he is happy performing? 13 is not an unusual age to get into it and as there are fewer boys than girls doing it there are lots of opportunities for them. He has a higher chance of getting into a competitive group in due course, for example. But even so, it is a good cardio and team activity.

Same! Black belt in karate and never done forward rolls. I’ve also done jiu jitsu and lots of rolls, falls etc in that.

my teens took up Tang Soo Do.

no forward rolls required.

you could, if you chose, do some sparring where limited physical contact was permitted but you had to have the correct protective gear (helmet etc) to be allowed to choose to do it.

otherwise pretty much no contact unless by consent (eg the instructor might ask to demonstrate something and say I am going to touch you here to show where to aim sort of thing)

Taekwondo features no forward rolls at all (and, at least at my club, no contact at all unless you specifically signed up for the contact sessions once you were better trained). It was more about self-discipline and precision than anything, but still a martial art and no forward rolls needed!

I would agree that karate could be a good fit. My DC have been going for 4 years and have progressed steadily through the belts. They are only entered for grading when ready and there’s no pressure to move on quickly.
My eldest has started contact sparring (1:1 fighting) now but only after a long time of non-contact practise fights. They don’t hurt each other - just score points for gentle taps.
The thing I like most about our club is that the instructor instills the values of respect, confidence and resilience all the time. They learn how to defend themselves from bullies in a way that won’t get them into trouble.
No forward rolls involved!

I've done 3 different martial arts over the years. Forward rolls were not required for two of them and taught as a shoulder sort of roll for the third, in class. We didn't have to be able to do it before we went.
Look at different styles - there's more than one style of karate for example.

Try Karate, no rolling about, but not so much fun as Judo - you never really get hold of them.

Same I have done karate for 5 years and have never had to do a forward roll.

Lovely idea thank you, but DS isn't in to dancing.
He finds it a bit embarrassing atm!

My ds does karate and I don’t think he’s ever had to do a forward roll. It’s all nanchukas and sparring looks quite good fun by all accounts. Perhaps try that instead of judo?