How to gently tell partner I don't like gift

[Runnermumof2]

So I was out 10 year anniversary yesterday. We don't really celebrate things like that, but being 10 years he wanted to get something to mark it. It was very nice of him and gave me a watch last night. Problem is that he really likes collecting nice watches, i don't.
He did say it wasn't expensive "so that I will wear it" and he left the receipt inside. I was £400. To me that's still expensive and honestly, I don't actually like it. It feels old fashioned to me, I know his mum would like it, so maybe that's what he was thinking ?
He said it would be good for work, as iv just gone back from maternity leave. Second problem being that I work in a hospital, so am not allowed to wear watches and am 'bare below the elbow'
How do I let him know gently that I'd prefer to return it ? I did try to bring up the topic when he mentioned that he's spent the last of his monthly money on is in a jokey way and said 'but I would have been happy with a trip to B&M, you didn't have to buy me a watch' and he responded that it was something he really wanted to do to mark the occasion.

I'm stuck. I don't want to hurt his feelings. But also I know if I keep it, it will just gather dust in the cupboard and the money could be much better spent elsewhere.
Any help ?

Explain to him that you love the way he wants to make this special occasion so memorable for you both, but that as you won’t be able to wear this type of watch everyday, as you'd want to, then it's not really a practical choice, as much as you like it.

Then (if you like this alternative suggestion) suggest swapping it for something like these alternative, which he can have engraved to personalise it for you.

(And maybe also get a nice little pendant to top it off with a nice "feminine" touch.

This us just an example, and they are available in a variety of case finishes.....

Hope this helps.....

I think you need to be honest or there will be more watches coming your way.

you don't like it and you cannot even wear it at work.

Can I suggest you go back to him with an idea for a £400 gift that would fit the bill and that you can exchange the watch for?

I would let him know that I appreciated him buying a gift but that it was not ‘me’ and more reflective of what he wants to buy me. I would ask for it to be returned and the money used for something else.

Surely he would want you to like and use the gift above his thought of buying the gift??

It actually is a Tissot watch that he bought. So I could do a swap for something like this.
I think I will talk to him about it and ask if we can pick something together that I can wear.
I actually realised today that I do own a watch (a Garmin) and it's been in the cupboard for 2 years 🤣 So I don't even think I wear this one for special occasions when I haven't touched the other one in two years.

I haven't seen the Dyson thread, but I'd actually love a Dyson hairdryer! I have mentioned it to him in the past , shame he didn't think of that instead of a watch 🤣

Thank you for such a thoughtful gift, it really is lovely and I cant believe how considerate you have been. Its not really my style though but maybe as you know so much about watches (and I dont) we could go any choose another one together at the weekend that is more to my taste but equally of good a quality?

However, If you dont like watches then just say so! My ex did a similar thing for me years ago. He was really into watches and bought be one worth £600. Wasted gift as I was happy with a £50 G-shock and actually preferred it.....
I was accused of being ungrateful when I hinted that it wasn't quite 'me' but that was him all over

I hope it works out for you, I actually bought my wife a very similar, but more expensive nurse's fob watch as a replacement when she graduated as a SRN having had it especially engraved, and while the watch "was very nice" you should have seen her face when she ( eventually!) spotted that it was engraved 💞

Pop back and let us all know how you get on....

Even for a special anniversary gift ?

£400 is a MASSIVE amount of money.
Anniversary or no anniversary.

It does sound like he has bought something he likes and is interested in rather than considering a thing that you would like and be interested in .

It's a bit annoying but not sure how you address it without him going in a huff .

Definitely don't ask for a different/cheaper watch if you don't care about watches and don't wear one. Ask for something that actually brings you joy.

I’d have said something straight away.

My husband bought me a bracelet last year from Pandora, a Diamonte one. If you like that kind of thing it’s nice but I do not. Too sparkly and shiny. If it had been a £20 bracelet I would have said thank you and wore it every now and then. But it wasn’t. I did say I really appreciated the effort he put into thinking of something but I I didn’t like it. I returned it.

I actually felt 2 ways about it. I did genuinely appreciate the effort but I also can’t understand why after 20 years he doesn’t know that I wouldn’t like that type of thing.

You might say that you love the fact he gave you a present but you can’t wear the watch at work and you’d like to exchange it for something you can wear every day, maybe some tiny diamond stud earrings., so can you choose it together?

Problem is that he really likes collecting nice watches, i don't.

Tissot watches are nice - I've got one - but I wouldn't put a £400 Tissot watch in the 'collectors' watch' bracket. I say this because I think he was genuinely trying to please you rather than buying something that was essentially for himself.

I think you just have to talk to him and exchange it for something you'll use. You could get other jewellery for £400, a necklace or earrings if you can't wear anything below your elbows.

It's the lack of thought that would upset me. The price to me is astronomical as well, but if that's normal for your relationship then fair enough.

He's clearly bought it because he likes watches. No consideration as to if you would like or be able to wear it.

Remember if your partners feelings are hurt because they have been thoughtless, then that's their problem.

Prepare for a big sulk though.

Just tell him it’s what HE likes and not what you like!! He is the lover of watches not you and you would prefer a nice ring/necklace/whatever!! Surely after 10 years you can tell him that?!?! But also after 10 years he should know you don’t like watches the way you do?

I would accept. It with grace . My x never bought me anything nice or expensive , you are lucky . If you say you don't like it it may be the last present you get .😚

Expensive watches are an investment and a signature piece. A good watch makes the wearer look classy IMO. I wear a Tag Heuer which people notice and compliment me on frequently.

I don't think I've ever noticed what watch someone wears.
I wouldn't have a clue what a Tag Heuer watch specifically looks like.
The point is the OP isn't interested in watches. Her husband is. Not her.
(I was fascinated by the little calculator watch a boy in my class at primary school had circa 1985. It was quite cool because you could make it play little tunes and spell out rude words "80085")

And that's fine for you, but that's an opinion, not a fact and for the OP she feels indifferent to watches, as do many. One would hope her husband of ten years would know that.

This is one of the reasons why I don't think it's sensible for adults to buy each other surprise presents. You're now stuck with something that you don't need, don't like and will never use. And he has wasted £400.

Yes!

I would accept. It with grace . My x never bought me anything nice or expensive , you are lucky

raise the bar a bit. Just because you got no presents does not mean you should be happy to get any present.

If it were me, I would think his feelings were worth more than the cost of the watch. Be grateful he loves you enough to want to give you a 'special' gift. You can just wear it occasionally, it won't kill you, and he'll be happy. It really is 'the thought that counts' sometimes