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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Almost run over by racists.

76 replies

Applecrumble0110 · 10/10/2025 09:20

I didn't know where else to put this tbh. But recently me, my baby (in a baby carrier) and toddler (in pram) went to our local co-op. Firstly we had an awful experience in there, it was so busy and not a single white person smiling or being polite to me or the one other POC but were to eachother. The tension was clear. My toddler is very friendly and smiled at another toddler at the self checkout and said "mummy look she has nice wellies like me", to which the child's mother gave us an awful dirty look and moved her towards her body like me and my 2 year old would do something to them.

Then upon leaving I stopped at a zebra crossing and to my left the car stopped so I began walking because to the right the car was pretty far and I either would have crossed in time/knew they would stop. They saw me and suddenly sped up, im talking INCREDIBLY FAST and drove towards us so I froze and stopped in the middle to let them past instead of drive right into us all. As they drove past they screamed racist slurs at us. The car to my left did beep the horn and ask if im OK but I ran to the other side of the road and stopped in a side street and just cried. My DH left work to come get me as the kids were screaming and I was panicking as I had to walk back home through England flag covered streets.

The September March against immigrants has changed my whole life. Everywhere I go people are no longer friendly and alot of the time give me dirty looks/are rude, the supermarket, shopping centre, local parks, for a walk with DC - anywhere! Went for our annual pumpkin picking with my DC at a local farm and it was the worst experience ever this year. People staring and scowling at my children and me. I no longer go to British supermarkets etc as i have a literal panic attack thinking about them. I dont know why I made this thread, maybe im clinging to the hope not everyone who is white in the UK hates me.

OP posts:
YouMightLikeCats · 10/10/2025 09:32

Those drivers are awful - I'm so sorry - it's really scary when people treat their cars like weapons. Arseholes. I would have asked if the other car had a dashcam.

I don't know where you live that everyone is scowling all the time but it's not the case everywhere, I can assure you! Some people just hate any real or expected inconvenience - whether that's children, someone daring to be in the same space as them, whatever. And some people like me just have natural grumpy expressions, so please don't assume that means I think badly of anyone nearby. I'm probably thinking of my to-do list when I'm in a supermarket, not what anyone else looks like.

Most of the general public are decent. The noisy racists are having a moment. But please do see your GP about the panic attacks as you must be having them very frequently?

ibuprofenhead · 10/10/2025 09:40

Ring the police to report the driver.

BadgernTheGarden · 10/10/2025 09:42

Where do you live? It sounds very strange everyone being rude to you because of your race. Driver's nearly hitting people on crossings not so uncommon and they always want to blame the pedestrian, I would assume it was just the worst thing they could think of to say to you, if you were white they would probably have called you a slag or some other misogynistic words.

ThejoyofNC · 10/10/2025 09:43

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nosmokinggun · 10/10/2025 09:44

BadgernTheGarden · 10/10/2025 09:42

Where do you live? It sounds very strange everyone being rude to you because of your race. Driver's nearly hitting people on crossings not so uncommon and they always want to blame the pedestrian, I would assume it was just the worst thing they could think of to say to you, if you were white they would probably have called you a slag or some other misogynistic words.

A driver didn’t just nearly hit her though, they sped up!

Winteriscoming80 · 10/10/2025 09:44

A non white person has never smiled at me!

NotSorry · 10/10/2025 09:45

That's just awful @Applecrumble0110 I hope you and your children are ok. I despair at some car drivers, and the racist slurs are disgusting. As pp said, if you got the reg, please report. So glad that the other car driver checked you were ok.

Enigma54 · 10/10/2025 09:45

Where do you live OP? This sounds horrid.

LadyKenya · 10/10/2025 09:46

I hear you OP. I know exactly what you mean by the looks that some people give you, because of the colour of your skin. I experience this as well, and know too well the denial, and disbelief that you will encounter here, voicing this. It should not have to be this way.

CottongrassPrincess · 10/10/2025 09:47

I’m white and I think these racists have been brainwashed into believing they’re above the law. If I’d been there I would have taken the car registration and called the police myself. I’m sorry this happened to you.

nosmokinggun · 10/10/2025 09:47

I can imagine that the flags can feel very intimidating - I feel quite uncomfortable walking through areas of my town where they’ve suddenly popped up, and I’m white British.
I also feel that it’s given people the go ahead to be openly hateful, like that awful driver.

LaChouette · 10/10/2025 09:48

Where in the country is this?

Applecrumble0110 · 10/10/2025 09:48

Thank you for the responses everyone. The driver sped off so unless I go back and ask a local business for cctv I have no details and was too panicked on the day. Also to those saying people might be scowling cause theyre busy etc... I have lived in this area and visited that co op a million times. Only after September 13th did this type of behaviour start and the England flags go up. Before this everyone DID smile etc. So there has been a significant shift. I usually smile and say hi and would have nice conversations with people when out on a walk etc. Even heard my own neighbours in the garden discussing how the area has too many p*kis but they didn't realise before. So I dont think my thoughts about this being blatant racist behaviour are unjustified!

OP posts:
Ddakji · 10/10/2025 09:48

The driver was horrific and you should report him.

The shop? Well, who knows. I live in a majority non-white area and I can assure you when I’m out and about most people look as miserable as sin, and to my mind are often spectacularly rude in shops, but I’ve come to think that that might be a cultural thing.

I myself have a complete resting bitch fave so no doubt I also look as miserable as sin! But I’m not really.

Edited to add - I can completely understand how the flag issue is making you feel. It’s a horrible time right now.

Twinstudy · 10/10/2025 09:49

I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with this, I think some of the replies on this thread just prove how bad things are getting in this country. It's horribly depressing but I don't know what the answer is.

FWIW I'm a white person and I certainly don't hate you, or indeed anyone due to their race. Not so keen on the racist scumbags though ...

Applecrumble0110 · 10/10/2025 09:49

LaChouette · 10/10/2025 09:48

Where in the country is this?

North England.

OP posts:
randomchap · 10/10/2025 09:49

Report it to the police, there might be cctv covering the zebra crossing.

badjeans · 10/10/2025 09:50

I’m so sorry that happened to you, and that you’re experiencing such an uptick in racism generally at the moment. I’m white, and I believe you, and I’m sending solidarity.

LoadsaTimeToday · 10/10/2025 09:51

OP that sounds awful. I am not white but am lucky that this stuff doesn’t happen much where I am in London and I meet lots of friendly people of all colours.

I believe what you have experienced. Here on MN, racists will fall over themselves to minimise racism, accuse people of playing the race card, and tell you about all the other reasons people treated you badly. But I am sure it was due to your colour, and I am sorry.

Ddakji · 10/10/2025 09:51

Just seen your most recent post - well, that sounds like a clear shift in behaviour. I’m sorry you’re surrounded by such idiots.

Thistoo2023 · 10/10/2025 09:51

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What age did you leave school then?

Applecrumble0110 · 10/10/2025 09:52

Twinstudy · 10/10/2025 09:49

I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with this, I think some of the replies on this thread just prove how bad things are getting in this country. It's horribly depressing but I don't know what the answer is.

FWIW I'm a white person and I certainly don't hate you, or indeed anyone due to their race. Not so keen on the racist scumbags though ...

Thank you. I was born here as were my parents. Me and my siblings and parents have worked hard to be valuable and productive members of society. We worked hard to go to university, get degrees and all work full time and have since 16/18. My brother is a pharmacist and sister an optometrist. My DH is a health care manager and not one of us has ever claimed any type of benefit. please before anyone replies to this comment saying im showing off or whatever, or that what has this got to do with anything- im trying to explain as grandchildren of immigrants we have worked our butt's off to contribute to society so I dont understand why people would think we dont deserve to be here

OP posts:
allthegrass · 10/10/2025 09:53

Ah that sounds awful especially the car incident sounds criminal! Did you get the reg number? You poor thing you must have been really shaken up especially having the little one with you 😔

WindOfUserNameChange · 10/10/2025 09:54

The driver speeding up is a police matter. They could have hit you. I'd report it even if though I assume without the registration number there is nothing that can be done.

It's a good reminder though how dependent we are on the good will and decency of other people. Once the social contract breaks down that we have with each other no one is save. It's something the far right, the far right excusers (aka the "my best friend's dog is brown so don't call me racist but this island is full" people), the anti semites and basically anyone bigoted or prejudiced doesn't get. Or doesn't care about. If you start thinking it's ok to treat one group of people as sub human then anyonenilnis at risk of being treated as sub human.

I'm so sorry for the experience you had. It sounds terrifying and I know I will think about it later today when I have to cross the road with my kids. (We are not white either).

LadyKenya · 10/10/2025 09:54

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So predictable. Don't smile, but don't scowl either, how about that? No need for hostile looks.