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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Almost run over by racists.

76 replies

Applecrumble0110 · 10/10/2025 09:20

I didn't know where else to put this tbh. But recently me, my baby (in a baby carrier) and toddler (in pram) went to our local co-op. Firstly we had an awful experience in there, it was so busy and not a single white person smiling or being polite to me or the one other POC but were to eachother. The tension was clear. My toddler is very friendly and smiled at another toddler at the self checkout and said "mummy look she has nice wellies like me", to which the child's mother gave us an awful dirty look and moved her towards her body like me and my 2 year old would do something to them.

Then upon leaving I stopped at a zebra crossing and to my left the car stopped so I began walking because to the right the car was pretty far and I either would have crossed in time/knew they would stop. They saw me and suddenly sped up, im talking INCREDIBLY FAST and drove towards us so I froze and stopped in the middle to let them past instead of drive right into us all. As they drove past they screamed racist slurs at us. The car to my left did beep the horn and ask if im OK but I ran to the other side of the road and stopped in a side street and just cried. My DH left work to come get me as the kids were screaming and I was panicking as I had to walk back home through England flag covered streets.

The September March against immigrants has changed my whole life. Everywhere I go people are no longer friendly and alot of the time give me dirty looks/are rude, the supermarket, shopping centre, local parks, for a walk with DC - anywhere! Went for our annual pumpkin picking with my DC at a local farm and it was the worst experience ever this year. People staring and scowling at my children and me. I no longer go to British supermarkets etc as i have a literal panic attack thinking about them. I dont know why I made this thread, maybe im clinging to the hope not everyone who is white in the UK hates me.

OP posts:
Applecrumble0110 · 10/10/2025 09:54

nosmokinggun · 10/10/2025 09:44

A driver didn’t just nearly hit her though, they sped up!

Thank you!! It was intentional!!!! And everyone noticed it hence all the stares and nobody moving their cars to watch what happens next.

OP posts:
Goditsmemargaret · 10/10/2025 09:54

You poor thing OP. I can't believe this is your current experience. I have no advice just offering a handhold.

I'm in Ireland. I'd like to think that would not be your experience here but sadly I have witnessed my brown husband receive racist slurs once. It was horrific and scary.

PandoraSocks · 10/10/2025 09:54

randomchap · 10/10/2025 09:49

Report it to the police, there might be cctv covering the zebra crossing.

This. They might check with the shop for it too.

PevenseygirlQQ · 10/10/2025 09:56

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

For no reason??? There’s never a reason to be racist!

Applecrumble0110 · 10/10/2025 09:56

Also must add my DH has fair skin, blue eyes and very light brown hair and so does DC1. The other has darker hair like myself and is also fair skinned but I wouldn't say we are white passing like my DH and other DC... when him and DC1 go out alone, people are much nicer to them recently than when we are all together

OP posts:
CoffeeCantata · 10/10/2025 09:56

I'm so sorry this happened to you, OP. Please report anything which is 'reportable'.

It's disgusting the way some people feel emboldened to be so nasty. I agree that you and your family deserve absolute respect and it makes me despair when I hear about this kind of thing.

I don't know what to say - I just wish I could reassure you that not everyone is like this. I hope it's just a thick and ill-educated minority, but that doesn't stop them upsetting you.

The silly line that 'you can only be hurt be the criticism of people you respect' is NOT true.

Beerpink · 10/10/2025 09:58

You need to listen to the posters here and report it to the police. Private mesaage as well.

Applecrumble0110 · 10/10/2025 09:58

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Can I ask what this even means??? What do you think me and my two very young kids buying dinner groceries did in there??? White people dont have to smile at me but they also dont have to scowl and move their kids away. Probably going to regret even replying to you because youre showing your true colours and sound like the people in my area were acting.

OP posts:
cestlavielife · 10/10/2025 09:58

I m sorry. Please do report

LakieLady · 10/10/2025 09:59

I'm so sorry this happened to you, OP, it must have been really frightening.

Fuck knows what goes through the minds of some of these people. Nothing but vile bigotry, it seems to me.

KoiTetra · 10/10/2025 09:59

100% report to the police! That is absolutely awful and disgusting.

With regards to no one smiling, to be fair I don't smile / scowl about 99% of the time, nothing to do with peoples race/skin colour/religion/sexuality/hair colour/insert other. I am just a miserable bastard to everyone equally!

Twinstudy · 10/10/2025 10:01

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

What would a reason for being racist be?

KirstenNotKristen · 10/10/2025 10:01

@Applecrumble0110 your thread will be a magnet for the racists and racist apologists. Try to ignore them and do not respond.

I’m sorry you went through that. I can’t imagine how you feel. Please report to the police.

LaChouette · 10/10/2025 10:02

Applecrumble0110 · 10/10/2025 09:49

North England.

I am so sorry. I am honestly lost for words and how to respond. This is not the Britain I know.

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · 10/10/2025 10:03

I'm sorry that you had to experience this, and that you're feeling the impact of the recent rise in racism.

I think you should report the incident to the police if possible. Even if you don't have any details, it should at least be logged and there might be camera footage.

I do appreciate that it may seem like cold comfort when you are encountering such hostile behaviour in your own local community, but please remember that there are many, many people in this country who abhor racism in all its forms and who are absolutely horrified by the way in which innocent people are being made to feel unwelcome and unsafe in our communities.

Jsowny · 10/10/2025 10:05

I believe you, and I am so very sorry you have been experiencing increased racism.
I can only speak for myself as a white person, in that I value our multicultural country and all that it stands for and I deplore racism and racist hostility.

CuriousKangaroo · 10/10/2025 10:06

The dehumanising language being freely used about people of colour is absolutely having an impact and what happened to you is a consequence of that.

I’m so sorry this happened to you. I imagine there will be an influx of people doubting you, but I believe you. I am in London so it doesn’t happen much here, but I sometimes travel for work and the hostility towards me as a brown woman when I go to places with high numbers of Reform supporters is noticeably on the rise. I actually check the voting/polling data before I go to new places now, so I can feel prepared for what I might face.

CoffeeCantata · 10/10/2025 10:07

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Oh, for God's sake!

I don't believe OP has taken the trouble to post here so articulately for absolutely no reason, or that she imagined it. If she felt this awful atmosphere and then had the car incident too, I have no trouble in believing that it was deeply upsetting.

I'm white British and I've experienced rudeness and unpleasant atmospheres in shops etc but when you're from immigrant heritage of course it's a totally different scenario. Anyone who doesn't realise that nasty people are feeling they can come out of the woodwork now must have been living under a stone.

I had a German friend who left the UK because of the nastiness from her neighbours after Brexit. People can be disgusting and it's very, very depressing.

Please don't minimise a genuinely disturbing (and maybe criminal) event.

lazyarse123 · 10/10/2025 10:11

Sorry was replying to a nasty post that's been deleted.

crackofdoom · 10/10/2025 10:13

I'm really sorry this happened to you, and I just wanted to say that, in common with PPs, I deeply value our multicultural society. I think it represents the best of modern Britain. And I would personally like to see the racists deported (but who would have them?!)

Thepeopleversuswork · 10/10/2025 10:17

I'm so sorry and ashamed that this sort of thing is happening to people like you and that these cretins feel empowered by the current political mood. Don't know what else to say other than to remember that most people aren't like this, despite what you might see on social media.

Please do report whatever you can.

anyolddinosaur · 10/10/2025 10:21

You were obviously in shock but it's a pity you didnt ask about dashcam footage/ cctv. The driver ought to be prosecuted for that. I've been hearing more stories of racist insults but nothing as bad as this. Insults are best ignored, it's often attention seeking and although it wont seem like it now it happens to white people too.

Moving a child towards you can be moving them out of the way or just comforting a shy child. But I'm afraid that those using the colour of their skin to bully anyone who disagrees with them or calling normal human interactions "micro aggressions" has created a climate where people are more wary of forming friendships with people of colour.

And those living in London should not think this doesnt happen there, I'm told it is happening in London.

NotbloodyGivingupYet · 10/10/2025 10:23

lazyarse123 · 10/10/2025 10:11

Sorry was replying to a nasty post that's been deleted.

That post was disgusting. I almost wish it could be left up so the whole of Mumsnet can see what sort of nasty attitudes the OP is dealing with.
It goes to show that you can never think that racism is over. It's always been there, just better hidden than before. But now they don't feel they have to hide.
Some people admired Oswald Mosley. Now it's Tommy Robinson. Makes me sick.

NotbloodyGivingupYet · 10/10/2025 10:25

anyolddinosaur · 10/10/2025 10:21

You were obviously in shock but it's a pity you didnt ask about dashcam footage/ cctv. The driver ought to be prosecuted for that. I've been hearing more stories of racist insults but nothing as bad as this. Insults are best ignored, it's often attention seeking and although it wont seem like it now it happens to white people too.

Moving a child towards you can be moving them out of the way or just comforting a shy child. But I'm afraid that those using the colour of their skin to bully anyone who disagrees with them or calling normal human interactions "micro aggressions" has created a climate where people are more wary of forming friendships with people of colour.

And those living in London should not think this doesnt happen there, I'm told it is happening in London.

Eh?
Are you victim blaming?

ThejoyofNC · 10/10/2025 10:27

Applecrumble0110 · 10/10/2025 09:58

Can I ask what this even means??? What do you think me and my two very young kids buying dinner groceries did in there??? White people dont have to smile at me but they also dont have to scowl and move their kids away. Probably going to regret even replying to you because youre showing your true colours and sound like the people in my area were acting.

I genuinely don't understand why my reply was deleted. It didn't break a single talk guideline. I didn't say anything in agreement with racism so not sure how I was "showing my true colours". I just asked why you expect people to smile at you.

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