Almost run over by racists.

[Applecrumble0110]

I didn't know where else to put this tbh. But recently me, my baby (in a baby carrier) and toddler (in pram) went to our local co-op. Firstly we had an awful experience in there, it was so busy and not a single white person smiling or being polite to me or the one other POC but were to eachother. The tension was clear. My toddler is very friendly and smiled at another toddler at the self checkout and said "mummy look she has nice wellies like me", to which the child's mother gave us an awful dirty look and moved her towards her body like me and my 2 year old would do something to them.

Then upon leaving I stopped at a zebra crossing and to my left the car stopped so I began walking because to the right the car was pretty far and I either would have crossed in time/knew they would stop. They saw me and suddenly sped up, im talking INCREDIBLY FAST and drove towards us so I froze and stopped in the middle to let them past instead of drive right into us all. As they drove past they screamed racist slurs at us. The car to my left did beep the horn and ask if im OK but I ran to the other side of the road and stopped in a side street and just cried. My DH left work to come get me as the kids were screaming and I was panicking as I had to walk back home through England flag covered streets.

The September March against immigrants has changed my whole life. Everywhere I go people are no longer friendly and alot of the time give me dirty looks/are rude, the supermarket, shopping centre, local parks, for a walk with DC - anywhere! Went for our annual pumpkin picking with my DC at a local farm and it was the worst experience ever this year. People staring and scowling at my children and me. I no longer go to British supermarkets etc as i have a literal panic attack thinking about them. I dont know why I made this thread, maybe im clinging to the hope not everyone who is white in the UK hates me.

But I'm afraid that those using the colour of their skin to bully anyone who disagrees with them or calling normal human interactions "micro aggressions" has created a climate where people are more wary of forming friendships with people of colour.

I have never encountered this climate? Is it particularly localised to a specific area?

You don't need to 'form friendships' with anyone, just don't be a complete dickhead towards them. I know some people find that a struggle, though.

I'm really sorry to hear that OP, I would definitely report the car incident to the police. 💐 Hope you and your children are ok, it must have given you an awful shock 💜

As a BAME person, I get what you mean, OP.

I’ve now stopped engaging with people because I don’t know who can end up holding those views.

When people smile at me or engage in chit chat with me, I’m always happy to smile or chat back but I no longer initiate contact with anyone out and about.

Those that seek to divide seem to have got what they wanted.

The shark jumped with that one!

You said “so everyone in the shop was just racist to you for no reason?”

So myself and other posters were wondering what a reason to be racist is/ pointing out there is never a reason to be racists.

Didn’t you also ask why white people have to smile at her? Something along those lines?

Your reply came over as blunt, unsympathetic and hostile.

You may not have intended it to be, but that's what I thought. OP has had an extremely unpleasant experience and I would have thought reassurance that not all white British people think like the ones she encountered is more important than challenging her account. I believe her - especially after what happened to my friend after Brexit.

I'm horrified that British citizens are now feeling unsafe and unwelcome.

i honestly don't think it's a universal thing, though, OP. My area is very mixed and I've never heard anyone report this kind of thing. I hope you'll be able to eventually move to a nicer area.

How did she bully anyone? Is complimenting someone's shoes bullying now? By a toddler?

Regarding calling normal human behaviour micro aggressions: you can never be sure about what people are really thinking. Who knows why the other mum moved her child away (who was in no way being bullied by op's toddler) but if you keep experiencing racism and you live in a climate where racism has become so normalised you can't help but wonder if people's behaviour is due to racism because unfortunately in just too many cases it is.

I’d imagine there are quite a lot of things you don’t understand. I’d give up trying if I were you.

If you don’t understand what I said, which seems pretty clear to me, I’m more worried about you buttercup. Have a wonderful day x

Nooo it was meant to be in reply to the poster you quoted!

Haha oh god I’m sorry! I thought you were sticking up for them! I take it back!

Word of warning @YouMightLikeCats, @WindOfUserNameChange and @NotbloodyGivingupYet: the poster you are trying to to engage with has form for minimising and disbelieving racism, and refusing to engage on such issues in good faith. I recognise her user name as she did it to me and I have seen her do it to others. Obviously up to you if you want to try to engage with her, but I have given up doing so in part because it derails threads like this where the OP needs support rather than argument.

Overt racism is definitely on the rise. My partner is African and has recently had to move to London because it got too difficult in her west country city.
There were always microaggressions (overt stares, random people coming up to her and touching her hair and skin, muttered comments) but since the rise of the patriot movement and reform it became too frightening to stay. There was a big patriot march last year and they were warned by police to stay at home the whole weekend, her mixed race child has been called the N word repeatedly over the last 2 years, cases every week at her NHS workplace of open racism from both staff and service users.
It's honestly feeling like the 70s again, especially in non metropolitan areas

I'd call the police anyway. They can get cctv from the local businesses if they have it but you need to be quick before it gets overwritten.

Its a hate crime, they should take it very seriously. Some people are just scum.

Nothing wrong with flying your countries flag though, and I refuse to let morons like them appropriate it to represent their disgusting views. Makes you ashamed to call them English.

Thank you so much for everyone with the kind and supportive words. It has made me feel alot better as I've been cooped ul in the house unless DH can take me anywhere. You are all lovely lovely people ❤️❤️❤️❤️
I do feel alot of people have grabbed onto the comment about smiling and I must clarify.

I am not some psychopath who walks around checking if white people, or people of any ethnicity/colour are smiling at me. Nor do I expect them to. I was trying to explain that usually people are friendly and have pleasant conversations with me un the line, smile at DC eyc. at that co op ,as an example. RECENTLY I have met with extreme scowls and rude behaviour. A resting b face doesn't bother me nit does anyone minding their business. Im mostly the same, busy with DC when out. But if YOU ARE ACTIVELY STARING at me, so when I make eye contact you can scowl, move your kids away from me and you are quite clearly engaging in friendly conversation with other white strangers then why am I wrong to be offended?

When DH is back from work will go to the local bakery near the zebra crossing and check for CCTV thank you everyone, dont really feel like reporting it but i should tbh. Also for anyone saying I may have misunderstood the slurs, I get it because my DM and Dsis tried to say the same but I heard what I heard and it was about me going back to when I came from and then more obscene language tbh...

Unfortunately thanks to the likes of Donald Trump, Nigel Farage and Tommy Robinson people are emboldened to show off their racism. It is actually disgusting and I am so sorry you or anybody feels that they are not welcome. I personally think we should round up all the people that have these views and find them a wee uninhabited island and let them set up their own wee country.

Thank you ❤️ baby was obviously unbuttered but toddler wants carrying if we go anywhere and won't sit in her pram or walk alongside us. Quite upsetting sometimes.

That made me giggle 😂 thank you.

Unbothered** haha my autocorrect sorry.

❤️ thank you

I'm so sorry, poor little girl 💔💜

I am so sorry this is your experience currently and you've noticed a significant change recently.

I don't know if there is a regional difference and I am sure there are racist bigots everywhere but I do feel that this is not how people from non white backgrounds experiences are in my area. I really really hope it isn't. It would make me so ashamed to live here.

As a very smiley white person, I gave however noticed that people seem to smile less and less, especially young people. I passed a hite young mum with a very small baby in her arms on a village path yesterday. I smiled because I always do when passing people in this circumstances and often add a 'hello if I feel it is appropriate, but despite catching my eyes, she didn't smile at all and I felt her facial features were questioning why I would even smile at her. It felt very awkward!

If you go round buttering babies I'm not surprised people are scowling at you OP 😂
I'm really sorry this happened to you, there are so many complete arseholes around. Big smiles from me.

Absolutely dreadful, I'm so sorry this happened to you OP .

I'm white and I certainly don't hate you, or any other POC.

What I do hate are those damned flags and fake patriotism, makes me sick to my stomach.

Take care of yourself and be reassured there are lots of white people like me who are appalled at what is going on right now.