To send invitation for 8th party happening mid-Jan?

[cremello]

The party is booked already because dates are already becoming unavailable. Party is for 8 children.

Yep same friends since reception.

It's far to early. At this point anything could change. My kid might decide to join a new club on that day. Kids could have football or a karate grading on that day we don't know about yet. A family member could book a christening in the next few months. I could not guarantee this far in advance for a 8 th birthday that is not family

If that is definately going to be the date then I would let people know by whatsapp at least. I mean, why not? Better for people to know and to be able to plan accordingly.

But I'm NOT going to plan around a random friend's 8th. birthday party. So you could send me the details and I'd put it in my diary... but as a tentative thing. And I'd be completely upfront that I can't commit as I have no idea what might be happening that weekend this far in advance.

I was on a thread here once where someone was really upset because she couldn't understand why people wouldn't commit in advance and she thought it was all about FOMO. But that's not it at all. I'm just not goign to rearrange my entire schedule around an 8 year old's birthday without a really good reason. I imagine that when my children are goign to 18th or 21st birthdays, then yes, we might plan accordingly and commit further in advance. But not in this sort of situation, no.

No, but they probably won't have any idea of work schedules yet, etc. We could probably accept now, but the vast majority of DS' friends parents are doctors, vets, etc; and they couldn't accept yet.

I also wouldn't send save-the-date notices for an 8th birthday party. I'd just get the invites out in early December.

Well yeah, and that's fine, isn't it. We all know that plans can change.

But if OP knows the date for sure, she may as well tell people.

Do you mean they're waiting to see if something better comes along?

We won’t have finalised when we’re visiting family for the weekend, won’t have the timetable out yet for sports fixtures, there may be invitations like a family Christening still coming out for that weekend. I don’t think you can expect someone to block out a weekend for a classmate’s birthday that far in advance. Six weeks is a good amount of time.

I'm in the same position as my daughter's party is booked for the first weekend of January as her actual birthday is over Christmas.

We don't send invites as such. We just pop a message in the class WhatsApp group (small class so everyone's invited) and then
WhatsApp everyone else outside school individually. This happens around early December to give people time to buy a present / put some money in an envelope.

We still have to remind parents as everyone forgets over Christmas.

Our party is just a flat fee for a number of kids up to around 20 so ultimately we don't particularly care exactly who turns up or not as we're not paying per kid who RSVPs.

It's different if you've booked the exact number you need or if it's a pain to increase or decrease the numbers.

TL:DR - tell people in early December.

Yes as a random child's birthday is quite low on people's priority lists so there will be many more important things that may come up in that time frame. If you ask a couple of weeks before or even a month before id be more able to say whether where available or not.

I don’t know that I would have worded it so bluntly ‘waiting to see if something better comes along’ but that is the crux of it because people aren’t usually going prioritise an 8YO’s party over other stuff they have going on.

Off the top of my head for January:
DD plays on a sports team, we wouldn’t miss a match except for her absolute best friend but would potentially skip a training session
Both my parents birthdays, Dad’s is a big one, if they have a do of some sorts I’d prioritise that
There’s a festival in DH’s village in France we were thinking of going to but don’t know the exact date yet but it is usually mid-late Jan

If I got your invite now I’d pop it my diary as tentative and ask when you needed RSVPs by and hope you said a month before or something more sensible! I wouldn’t forget to come back to you but you run the risk that some people might and then it’s more faff chasing up responses than if you’d just sent the invite in December.

I've decided to send out on the Thursday just before the end of term (Friday midday)

It might also be worth giving people another message after Christmas just as a reminder as I swear half the world has amnesia the beginning of January. Im just as bad

I have no idea what I’m doing in January and definitely would not be committing to a child’s party now. 2 weeks notice, 3 at a push for a party is all that’s needed. It’s not a case of waiting to see if something better comes along, but I would have your child’s party quite low on my list of priorities.

give a heads up to parents; xyz booked for birthday on that date, will send invitations much closer to the date.

Most people will put it in their calendar and frankly be grateful for the warning. You might have a few: might not be available because of football/dance..competitions but don't know dates yet.

At least, it prevents them from accepting another similar party invitation if they already have yours down.

so basically, yes, waiting to see if something better comes along 😂

I never understand that attitude.

I personally couldn't care less about an 8 yo party but when my kid get an invit or a heads up, I ask my child and put it in the family calendar if they're interested.

If the chances are that it will clash with a sport tournament of some kind, I decline there and then if I must RSVP so early.

if it's in the calendar, I don't accept similar invitations for that day.

How can it be such a ridiculous big deal? it's easy.

I totally agree with this. Yes, it’s early but if things were getting booked up well in advance, it’s totally reasonable to book now, and parents can put it on their diaries loosely, with a view to a proper RSVP in December

Because i would hate to say they're coming and the mum pays for their space and then they can't go. If im asked with only a couple of weeks to go i will be fairly aware of whats happening and less likely to mess people about

This is what I would do too.

As they all be friends for 3 or 4 years I presume the parents know each other fairly well at this stage. Isn't it likely that it'll come up in conversation.
e.g. when one of the older ones have a party in the coming weeks, you'd maybe mention that you've already booked the venue for your DS.

i.e. if this is a close friendship group they may well just find the date out organically.

I don't even have a 2025 diary yet. WAY too soon to send invites. It's 3 months away.

2026 🤣

Unless they are suddenly sick, WHY couldn't they suddenly not go?

Again, if there are risk of sport or clubs activity, I warn or decline if I have to RSVP. Otherwise, it's booked, noted and I can forget about it until the beginning of the month when I have a look at what is planned.

Chances of us going on last minute holiday during school term are very very low (sadly 😂)

No its far far too soon. About a month before is early enough

I do.. School and clubs calendars have most days already planned and booked!
I am not even talking about my own social life , my kids have a better one😂

That's the whole point, I don't know what I am doing, if the day is free, I write down the invitation, and done. How else do you organise anything?

It's not even an invitation, just a warning the party is booked for that day. I'd be grateful for the warning.