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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Wierd neighbour thinks she's me.

90 replies

Goober · 04/06/2008 08:29

A woman who lives near me and my family copies everything I do. I changed my car a few weeks ago and I watched as she walked past my house, she looked so annoyed and cross. She went bright red and I thought that she was going to burst.
Yesterday, I had my hair cut into a short Bob. I saw this.....person who was staring at me but as usual she wouldn't speak to me and later in the afternoon she flounced past my house with a newly cut short Bob. She was staring at my window grinning.
I have never spoken to her but she copies the silliest of things like a change in lipstick colour.
Do you think I should worry? Or is it just that I am such a trend setter?

OP posts:
thefunkypea · 04/06/2008 08:34

She obviously has no style of her own or confidence in her own choices. It's supposed to be kind of flattering, but I'd be a bit freaked out TBH that someone was watching me that closely to notice what lipstick colour I was wearing.

littlelapin · 04/06/2008 08:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

duchesse · 04/06/2008 08:40

Is your surname Jones by any chance?

EffiePerine · 04/06/2008 08:40

dungarees

kitbit · 04/06/2008 08:52

Definitely charity shop clothing item, then she won't be able to go and get one! Agree, it is a bit creepy that she's following QUITE so closely. Do you actually know her or talk to her? If the answer is no, I think I'd keep it that way!

Original poster
Goober · 04/06/2008 13:11

Sorry for the delay, I had to do the weekly shop. God, is that expensive?
Anyhoo, I spoke to her once, about 3 years ago when she was in the early stages of her last pregnancy. It was in the Dr.'s sergury and I heard her check in with the midwife so I congratulated her and she said she hadn't told anyone yet, so would I keep it to myself. I did. That was the first and last time. Although I do try to say "Good morning" sometimes. She looks at her feet and doesn't even grunt. Like I said before though, she often stares at my house, unless I am visible.
Her husband/partner/whatever is a different story altogether; he always talks, even if she's with him, and he looks at me as if he'd like to eat me.
I don't know which one freaks me out the most.
My husband thinks it's funny. He calls her my Clone.
Hmmmm. Very funny Darling!

OP posts:
Original poster
Goober · 04/06/2008 13:13

Did I also mention that I'm the far better looking Clone?

OP posts:
Original poster
Goober · 04/06/2008 13:14

And I have a nicer house.

OP posts:
ClareVoiant · 04/06/2008 13:15

he'd like to eat you? in a good or a bad way? maybe it him, making her change so she's like you?
[evil laugh emoticon]

PrettyCandles · 04/06/2008 13:16

Aha - it's her dh that's the problem. She's worried abut what he sees in you. Angry with you because he finds you interesting (note careful choice of word), yet wondering whether if she does what you do he will be 'interested' in her.

tissy · 04/06/2008 13:17

well, if her husband makes no secret of teh fact that he fancies you, maybe she is just trying to regain his attention? I'd feel sorry for her.

VoluptuaGoodshag · 04/06/2008 13:18

She sounds very insecure and if her DH is lavishing such attention on you then no wonder. If they are together do you not even try to join her in on the conversation?

Oh and your last two posts are a bit off.

donnie · 04/06/2008 13:19

personally you seem the weirder of the two IMO. You'll have to undergo full transgender surgery then see what happens.

LynetteScavo · 04/06/2008 13:21

I bet her DH has told her he fancies you!

She's trying to be like you to please him.

I think she secretly hates you - which is why she doesn't speak to you. I could be worse - she could have befriended you.

I hope this post doesn't sound like I'm beeing mean or strring - it's just what I reckon.

VinegarTits · 04/06/2008 13:21

Be flattered, she obviously thinks you have good taste. You could have some fun with her by going out wearing something completely ridiculus and untrendy and see if she copies

BLONDIEBABE · 04/06/2008 13:25

start washing your car in a bikini and see if shes copies you doing that. video her and send it to you tube she won't copy you again!!!!

DirtySexyMummy · 04/06/2008 13:25

So, you have a neighbour who you think;

a) is not as pretty as you
b) is not as confident as you
c) hasn't as nice a house as you
d) her husband fancies you
e) she is obsessed with you

I think you are the one obsessed dear. Most people probably admire someone else, and will copy certain parts of their style. Most people also don't notice when this is happening, and if they do, they don't describe it as 'weird'.

muggglewump · 04/06/2008 13:28

Maybe behind closed doors her husband goes on about you alot and she feels that he'll stop it if she's more like you?
I feel sorry for her, she's obviously insecure and I'd guess unhappy too

savoycabbage · 04/06/2008 13:29

Surely everyone has a bob at the moment!

VinegarTits · 04/06/2008 13:30

Yeah you do come across as quite cockey about it, with the better house, better looking, jibes (but maybe you were just joking?) i had a friend who was like this once, everytime i bought a new outfit she would by the same/similar, i didnt see her as weird though, i was actually quite flattered that she liked my taste, as i think i have awful taste sometimes.

donnie · 04/06/2008 13:32

exactly DSM. My sentiments too, hence my comment earlier.

Original poster
Goober · 04/06/2008 13:32

Voluptuagoodshag: The comments you refer to were a joke. Text just doesn't have the same way to show you that I'm being sarcastic as an actual face-to-face-conversation. Sorry if I offended you.

I feel sorry for her, even though she is strange.
When I speak to her husband it's only ever "Good morning" or he might stroke my dog. I don't deliberately leave her out and if she wanted to say "Hi" I would return it and I have tried to do that in the past. She does HATE me. Its the other bit that I don't get, the hair, make-up, staring thing.

OP posts:
AggiePanther · 04/06/2008 13:34

Agree with DSM.

You say "I watched as she walked past my house, she looked so annoyed and cross. She went bright red and I thought that she was going to burst" ....she has not actually done/said anything - you are assuming she was annoyed/cross because of you. You also assume that she copied your hair - perhaps she already had an appointment to have a bob. She may have been grinning for an entirely different reason - it may have nothing to do with you. You're the one watching her.

ComeOVeneer · 04/06/2008 13:34

HOw on earth do you know that a woman you have said no more than a few words to ever hates you? How the hell can she hate someone she doesn't even know? TBH I think you are flattering yourself to think that she expends that much time and effort over you!

VoluptuaGoodshag · 04/06/2008 13:35

Sorry then I didn't mean to cause offence.
I do think if her DH is making such an obvious play for you then that must be really hard to deal with. Sounds like he's a bit of a git if he's doing this in front of his partner. It can be a bit unnerving if someone copies you all the time but she sounds like she's having a rough time of it.