DH comment on new neighbour

[Alicelong]

If your DH, unprompted, said your new neighbour looked like ‘absolute filth’, would you be a bit taken aback?

When I asked what he meant, he said in the ‘bedroom sense’.

This was the first time he saw her btw.

Depends whether I was married to a massive misogynist with a history of chasing other women. If I was then I wouldn't be taken aback at all.

So his first thought when meeting a new woman is to judge her on her sexual performance?

Is he a sexist stereotype in other ways

He literally fancied the pants off her.

I didn't marry a misogynist so wouldn't happen

Well if my husband said something as nasty as that I would get the ick so bad my vagina would seal itself shut and my hormones would flee.

I would be extremely taken aback, because my DH would never describe a woman like that.

Grim. He must have made other comments before? I wouldn't be with him.

This…

Oh, gross. Now you know your DH wants to fuck the NDN.

Does he normally talk about woman in this way? Does he normally tell you what he imagines having sex with them would be like?
Totally inappropriate and disrespectful to you. And to the new neighbour. And shows he only sees women as sex objects

I would assume he has a personality transplant

What on earth was the poor woman wearing to prompt this delightful comment?
Or was she like dripping in mud or something?
We need context?
Either way he seems a delight.

What does that even mean? He's not saying hot or cute or beautiful.
Sorry but he's the gross one.

Don't blame how she was dressed. Ffs

I would be very surprised, because he’s not an arsehole

I'm going to get flamed here but I have to be honest, I said something similar to my husband very recently about a person on TV.

It was a cooking show and she wasn't dressed provocatively but she had a look about her, her eye contact, lips etc that gave off a very sexy and sultry vibe and I'll admit I said she looks like she would be really dirty in bed, I.e a bit kinky. I didn't mean anything more by it and I certainly wasn't saying I fancied her/viewed her as an object!

That is gross.

@randomchap I was joking you saddo.

I'm sorry OP. That was really disrespectful of your DH to say. I can't imagine being married to someone that would say things like that.

Does he often comment on other women in front of you? What he said was horrible too 🤢

It wasn't funny. At all

It didn't come over as a joke tbh.

I think that's different as you're straight (I assume; sorry if wrong!) and so it was a 'safe' comment IYSWIM; and it was someone on telly, not a new neighbour who you'll probably have to look in the eye if they come round with a parcel or whatever.
DP and I have certainly passed similar comments about celebrities, and we both know it's not misogyny or a desire to have sex with them, just light-hearted observations.
He'd never say that to me about a woman we know, and I'd never say it to him about a man we know.

No, I wouldn’t. I’d be astonished and assume he’d had a head injury.

It sounds like something he’s saying deliberately to make you jealous/upset.

I would describe myself as filthy in bed, and I’d only ever mean it as a compliment if I said it about someone else - in fact my friend and I have a running joke about which male celebrities, fictional characters etc we think would be ‘absolute filth’ and I will occasionally get a WhatsApp with a picture of a vaguely famous bloke captioned with exactly this those words. I don’t find the phrase, or the thought, remotely problematic or sexist.

But, clearly, it’s a shitty thing to say to one’s partner about someone else. I wouldn’t in a million years say to my partner “That new bloke at work looks like absolute filth” (even if I’d thought it) because it would clearly be baiting my partner or trying to make him feel insecure. I can’t imagine anyone ever saying that to their partner, about someone else, without being deliberately nasty.

He fancies her something rotten