Is fatphobia a real thing?

[AnxiousApocalypse]

Having watched the Panorama documentary on the Met Police and the police officer making rude comments about a fat woman and how "she was so fat she had two pussies", I'm wondering how much hate and disgust most people truly have against fat people? I'm not excusing it and saying it's not dangerous for your health to be overweight or obese, but surely being rude and ignorant isn't the answer?

I have a colleague who is morbidly obese. The first time I went out in public with her (we got the train to a conference together) was a real eye-opener. People didn't even attempt to hide the fact they were staring at her, men looked her up and down in a really obvious way with expressions of pure disgust on their faces, teenage girls looked at her while whispering to each other and giggling behind their hands, at one point a group of young men walked past us and one just looked at her and went "fucking hell" like he'd never seen an obese person in the wild before. I remember thinking "there's no way she can be oblivious to this", it was so blatant. But she didn't ever react to any of it. Either she was so used to it she genuinely didn't notice anymore, or her way of dealing with the embarrassment was to pretend it wasn't happening. It made me feel really sad for her that this was something she clearly accepted as a normal part of everyday life.

I’m not phobic about fat people , but I don’t think it’s attractive.
I have been overweight and I feel so much better now I’m slimmer.

I’m actually not patronising you, but if thats how you’ve taken my response I’m sorry. If you read my previous post I’ve not once said I don’t understand that some people have issues with their weight for other reasons. I’m just simply stating working long hours and at a desk isn’t necessarily a reason to be overweight as long as your calorie intake isn’t excessive vs your calories burnt.

As you have just explained you have issues with your metabolism…

Yes of course.. there was a thread the other day about a man who didnt contribute enough around the house. As soon as everyone found it he was overweight, they started in calling him a fat this and a fat that. If he was short, had a big nose, was bald, or perhaps female, nobody would use his looks or weight to insult him. But as he is obese, it is fair game to rip into his character and his physical appearance.

Of course you'll have those who say "I'm not scared of fat people, I just find them vile and repulsive, not scary". but of course the more intelligent of us know what the phobia in terms like fatphobia really means.

I'd think of "fatphobia" as being afraid of getting fat, not hatred towards fat people. Is that what you meant?

It can be part of it and that fear comes from believing that fat people are vile characters as their obesity says something about them as a person. They are lazy, undisciplined, selfish, greedy etc. You think because you think those things about fat people, others will think them about you.

Poor woman, I feel her pain.

In that case, no. I'd absolutely hate to be fat, but only because I wouldn't like how I looked, and wouldn't like how I felt in my body, and it would severely restrict me from doing what I love (various forms of exercise), not because I think fat people are "vile" or any of those other words.

It’s never restricted me from exercise at all. I do aerial hoop, netball, weights, 45 min spin classes, outdoor swimming…

I’ve been fat and thin, I’m currently fat. Men don’t bother me at all which is good.

People will judge negatively but I haven’t found it’s stopped me in any way. No one has said anything to my face.

I’ve probably said the worst things about myself than anyone else has about me.

What? In the same way islamophobes are scared of becoming muslims? Homophobes are scared of becoming gay? How ridiculous. Of course it's about how they perceive and treat others.

I absolutely couldn't do cross fit and hyrox as a very fat person, and nor would I want to.

Depends what you class as very far I guess. BMI wise I would be obese but I’m a size 16 at 5ft 10

This advert seems to be right on cue…

There’s one thing debating obesity and the effects on society, or engaging in conversation with someone overweight when they instigate the conversation. But to make derogatory remarks about someone’s appearance, totally unprovoked, is totally fatphobic.

And yes it does exist, people make remarks all the time, jokes behind people’s backs, comments about what people are wearing out and about and whether that’s suited to their figure. I’ve heard it out and about, seen it on this forum. It’s very much still a thing even in this day and age where people should know better.

Size 16 at 5ft 10 must be pretty average looking weight wise - and tall. I think sometimes people forget there are just different builds. I look at some slimmer people and they clearly have a very tiny skeleton under everything! Even if I was completely slim I’d be taller and broader. This doesn’t excuse everything but it must have some impact.

After being diagnosed with hypothyroidism, and becoming aware just how prevalent it is and how under-diagnosed it is, I soon realised that many are very overweight because of it. Literally nothing they do in the way of dietary changes or exercise could shift even one pound of weight. So I learned not to be so judgmental about the subject and to realise that every person faces their own demons, so to speak.

I'm currently a size 12 with BMI <25. A year ago I was size 22-24 BMI 43. Total weight loss just over 8st. I've used (needed) WLI to achieve this.

People are treating me like a totally different person. My body is absolutely everyone's business to discuss at any moment. People are now worrying I'll "go too far". Lots of questions about whether I've "cheated" or done it "the healthy way". I haven't shared my use of WLI outside immediate family and healthcare professionals. It's my medical info which colleagues and acquaintances have no right to.

There's an implication that I am now a better person. I'm not. The effect of WLI has given me personally a sense of vindication. I was not a weak willed person. I was not a lazy slob. I had a medical condition which has been successfully treated.

Most people who are fat are fat because they overeat and under exercise. There are some exceptions to that rule but for the vast majority of people it’s true.

Most people would be slimmer if they made lifestyle changes. There are myriad reasons why such changes are difficult but that’s exactly why fat people are considered negatively, because to be fat suggests a lack of discipline.

It absolutely exists - I’ve been overweight my entire life (doing something about it now - 5 stones down and more to go!) and people do seem to think it’s fine to make rude comments about weight/size to complete strangers in public.

You definitely do get judged - a guy who I’d considered to be a friendly acquaintance, (friend of a friend) recently asked me what my job was, and when I said what it was (quite difficult job, requires degree and professional qualifications) he looked shocked and said “Christ, I always thought because you’re fat you must be thick”. Needless to say, no longer on friendly terms, at least from my side anyway!

But it's irrelevant to me what size anyone else is. I don't want to be fat, for me. I'm allowed to have a preference over my own body and health.

You know this is basically saying that as long as you know it isn't their fault, it is acceptable to you.

It’s very rude and totally unnecessary.

What’s ironic to me, is it’s often those who’s aren’t exactly slim who make the comments too. I had a tradesman around the other week who made a really unkind comment about someone in a local shop, but the tradesman was carrying a lot of extra pounds himself!

I think rudeness about someone’s looks is often a sign of low intelligence and low class. And too much time on their hands.

I agree but you'll get posters stating otherwise.

in 1960 the obesity rate was 1-2% in the UK, 13% in the US.

now it's 64.5% in the UK. underactive thyroids and other conditions were still there back in the day, they don't magically appear.

people were much more active back then.

it's not always down to eat less do more, but a lot of it is for sure. The stats through time show that.

Maybe it’s because I’m on my period but this has made me tear up.

Horrible.

And the worst thing is this will make some obese people not want to leave the house at all which doesn’t help matters.

people making jokes about fat people is nothing new. Personally, I avoid fatties but each to their own.