To panic about needing to serve a liquid Xmas dinner

[Ciderapplevinegar]

A relative is in the unfortunate position of not being able to swallow solid food. They are currently living on soup and meal replacement drinks. However, I am hosting Xmas this year and really want them to be able to take part. But I'm so stressed!
Has anyone got any ideas of how I can feed them? They've said they are more than happy to bring their own "food", but I know they'd love to be able to join in. Might have to just be a nice meal rather than a Xmas one - possibly custardy trifle? Extra saucy moulles? Any other thoughts?!

There's a company somewhere that makes soft food. Everything is puréed and then reshaped to look like the original, I saw one meal that was mash , peas and steak/ chop, the puréed peas are moulded back into a shape that looks like a pile of peas, the meat thing was chop shaped. I was absolutely fascinated with it when I saw it, and thought it was a fantastic idea for people with swallowing or teeth problems.

I would 1,000% involve them in the decision of what to do. Otherwise you risk making a big fuss and producing something they won’t be able to tolerate, much to their and your discomfort.

I mean personally, I’d just blend up the Christmas dinner, but they might not like that. There’s also plenty of Christmassy soups you can make.

I temporarily had dysphagia , it was difficult to swallow certain textures and types of food .
I made a lot of soups and puréed them to be completely smooth and not too runny as that’d make me choke and cough as it trickled down my throat.
I loved ice cream but no added “bits “ , same with yoghurts they needed to be free of fruit pieces even if the pieces were soft
Mixed textures didn’t work for me as I was gagging on things like porridge.
You’re being very kind and thoughtful here , catering to this guest / family member.
i would actually ask them what texture and thickness of food they can manage .
It could be they have soup and custard/ ice cream, ?

Good luck - you are really kind to make so much effort. Just a small warning that some types of potatoes go very gloopy if you put them in a blender and it would be a shame to spoil your efforts! Carrots and parsnips blend well though!

You sound lovely but my mum was liquid only and could easily get triggered from food that she wasn’t used to. Homemade soups with too much fibre could be really bad. At the end she struggled even with the juice based fortified drinks. I would definitely say bring your own or let me know exactly which brand to buy in. She never wanted it to be a big thing. She just wanted to soak up the atmosphere without making it all about her eating issues. (She had cancer but after radiotherapy she was able to eat some creamy foods until the last 6 months or so).

I’m sure you will make it work and lovely for everyone.

I’m a carehome cook and level 3 can be tricky if you don’t know what you’re doing. It must be the right exact consistency, and have absolutely no “bits” in it, to the extent that you shouldn’t even blend up foods with skins or casing, for example baked beans. Also a regular domestic blender may not cut it. We use robot coupe blenders to ensure smoothness.

If you don’t feel confident, I’m sure you will be able to pre order Christmas dishes online.

I had a broken jaw a few decades back and so was completely wired shut for 7 weeks. Nothing but pure liquid could go in. Basically whatever it was it had to fit between my teeth. My mom tried to make me some realllllly milky mashed potatoes once but it was too thick.

What I did really love was a good creamy soup. The best ones I got when I was in a really nice restaurant and for once it was worth paying the silly prices they charge for something that is really quite simple. So a good mushroom soup made from scratch, fried mushrooms, some chopped onion etc deglazed with white wine and then proper cream in it. And for me then it would need to be strained. But it would be full of flavour and that was great.

Another thing I remember loving was getting a coffee milkshake, one of those made to order. It was lovely. Also because I was eating almost nothing I had half a glass of wine once and felt completely drunk!

side note....when I used to go to restaurants I would either take a book or some postcards etc to send to friends (pre email....) I was there one day, had written a card and realised I couldn't lick the stamp to attach it. So I asked the very nice young man who was my waiter if he would lick my stamp for me. He gave me a look up and down, then winked and said "well I've been asked to lick worse things!"

fyi - when you mouth is wired shut you can't really laugh so all I could do was a disgusting snort. nearly ripped my stitches!

Please don't stress. I am a speech and language therapist specialising in swallowing disorders. Let your friend bring their own food. They will know exactly what they can manage. I'm sure they are delighted to have been invited and will not want you to get stressed out.

Don’t force what you want, ask them if they would rather you sort something or they provide their own.

I've not read the full thread but have seen a couple of mentions of wiltshire farm foods and would also suggest them - far nicer than trying to make your own puree of each item! Even if you had to take each item and dilute them a little more to make them level 3 you know you're starting with a perfectly smooth puree and you could (if your guest wanted) do something fancy like a meat, veg and potato soup with the three flavours separately in one bowl, which ,might be a nice option rather than just 'here's a roast dinner soup'

I have DMed you.

I have experience with this. This year it’s moved onto slightly firmer texture. Last year the blender was used heavily, but what seemed to be appreciated was I kept everything separate in a sort of thali tray so it was not just mixed together slop. Just be very sure of the level of texture as we’d last year gone up a stage from only liquid/thin milkshakes, to a texture that was much thicker, so I blended but not a huge amount of liquid was added to things. Eg I blended peas with chicken stock to a consistency of maybe a leek and potato soup with no bits.

Recently I made a chicken mousseline that worked, so maybe turkey version for Christmas. For me I think whatever the consistency go for separate compartments if possible.

This is one of those things where the right thing to do is to tell them and work with them, don’t spring anything on them. They’ve said they are happy to bring their own, you’ve decided they’d actually love to “join in” without checking with them. Presumably they won’t be locked in a cupboard to eat if they bring their own food so they will be joining in?!

Unless they have no mental capacity just ask them,!!!

This with bells on.

Ask. They may very well be uncomfortable/ anxious about eating anything they have not prepared

My cousin had his jaws wired after a car crash, my auntie blended everything, right down to a Sunday dinner for him, blended separate piles of meat with gravy, mashed potatoes with veg & extra gravy poured over it. Could you do cauliflower cheese, easily blended, mashed potatoes with extra butter & cream, you could even add parsnips, blend meat with gravy & stuffing. For pudding a trifle without fruit, do sponge, jelly, custard & cream. You could do soup as a starter. The only meal I can see as a problem is if you have your guest staying for tea if you have the main event at lunchtime, unless you could do a savoury mousse with soft cheese & maybe smoked salmon blended very fine. Do you have one of those mini blenders? They are perfect for doing all this.

I get what you are trying to do bit it comes across as you wanting to make it about you, if you make something they would habe to consume it even of they dont want too just to be polite, sure they may love it but do what is best for them what they want not you

chocolate mousse

Respectfully it’s not that simple for someone who is medically unable to swallow certain textures rather than just can’t chew. You need to get the thickness spot on, there are certain foods you need to avoid and you generally need a specialist blender to ensure smoothness. A bog standard domestic one won’t do the job.

They might feel more comfortable bringing their own, I know I would in that situation.
You can include them by being welcoming and not making a fuss of forcing them to try new or different foods!

That's fine that you feel that way, and if they did then that would be absolutely fine. But I am not "forcing" them, and they are keen to enjoy some Xmas food if we can make it work.

I know it's fine to feel how I feel. 🫣

Let them bring their own food; they know what works.