Changing nappies on airport seats

[KittyCoo]

I don’t have any DCs yet and not planning on ttc for a few years.

I was at a mallorca airport last and the plane was about to board abd a lady changed her around 4/5mth old baby’s dirty nappy on the passenger seats. I told her that was disgusting and people have to sit there to use the bathroom opposite as there was a changing table in there. admittedly there was a big queue but not the point imo.

When I have DCs, I’d never dream of doing that, I’d always use the facilities provided in the vicinity as respect and courteousness to others. I personally believe it’s lazy parenting not to use adequate facilities available!!!

AIBU, that some parents with babies these days think they’re so entitled just like the one I’ve described above ? And AIBU for berating her actions the way I did ?

So the lady is probably in a heightened level of stress travelling with a little one, the flight is about to board, there’s a long queue for the baby change and the baby decides that’s the best time to go (as they do, without fail). I can quite understand why she made the decision to change it there and then. Not ideal but neither was the situation. What you could have done is reassure her that you’d go tell the gate staff not to close the gate without her so she could queue for the toilets, or maybe go to the toilets with her and be another voice asking if anyone minded if she jump ahead since her flight was boarding. A bit of kindness costs nothing.

Yeah, I know, and funnily enough I was nannying twins at the time and also potty training them. Logistical nightmare at times but there’s absolutely no way I would have done what she did. My point is though she was obviously pretty fragile and I wouldn’t want to be responsible for making someone feel more shit than they did already.

Agreed. It’s the chance you take if you decide to potty train on the go

If there was a big queue then clearly there was not "adequate facilities provided!"

I do think people would do well not to berate mothers of small children who are probably doing their best!

A soiled and potentially leaky nappy, a baby who could start crying from said nappy any minute, a long queue for the toilet, the need to get on the plane any minute - all adds up to a potential needs much moment! Or at least one where people might weigh up the situation differently.

You say she used a mat and was quick so this wouldn’t bother me.

And everyone is a perfect parent until they have kids.

Quite.

That's true and you sound very kind but she really did need telling. Hopefully having a strip torn off her made her realise that she was totally out of line there. FWIW, I'd be far more sympathetic about the nappy changing mum at the airport where there was a long toilet queue. I wouldn't have told her she was disgusting and I'm fine with friends changing their babies' nappies in the same room as me. But that is different to letting your toddler take a shit in a potty in public. Really unfair on the kid as well.

@spicetails @Makingpeace when i say a big queue, I meant just to use the toilet not baby changing!!

@FanofLeaves @CheeseWisely I don’t think o mentioned that I have Crohn’s disease. So I have a radar for emergencies!! If I’d noticed in time or if she’d got in the queue, I would’ve happily lent her mine!!! But admittedly I don’t go round wearing a t-shirt saying I have Crohn’s and have a radar!!

@FanofLeaves with regards to that mum potty training, I symphaidse as with Crohn’s it can be urgent , so maybe she could’ve asked to have used the staff loo in that situation with the toddler. Potty training is different to nappy changing, b/c when in a nappy they’re already been, whereas potty training they’re about to go!

I think the Mum was in the wrong re the potty but I don’t really think people should be “tearing off a strip” from mothers in public. Tell her, by all means, but no need to humiliate people who aren’t doing anything actually criminal.

I have done this, 5 from the from to board the plane, had my then 6 month old baby in my arms, when I felt a wet patch on her clothes. Was panicking we wouldn’t get on the plane as the queue behind us was huge and I couldn’t see a toilet signs a row of seats next to us so I changed her bum. I was stressed just as this woman probably was. Wasn’t ideal but why make someone’s day harder

You try flying with kids and then come back... let's see if your still on that high old horse!

Lets not berate mothers who are trying their best, especially when you have no experience of having a child yourself. You can say you wont do x, y and z with your own child but we all know you will if you choose to have them.

I'm with the op on this one. It's disgusting.

Having said that, I've been in a departure lounge before where someone has changed their baby, but at least took it away from everyone else. That wasn't too bad, but I still can't imagine not washing your hands after. Gross.

I once had a few words for a hipster in a Brewdog pub who thought that I'd appreciate how much of a 'hands on dad' he was as he changed his child on a seat. He was deliberately looking around to see who noticed what a great guy he was, too. That stunt backfired for him.

Tbh I'm torn on this. Obviously it's not ideal and if it were me I would have tried to do it more out of sight, or on the floor. I definitely would have put my travel change mat down.

BUT if my baby had pooed when I was just about to board a plane, then I looked over to the toilets and there was a huge queue which could potentially take ages and make us last to board, I would have changed them where we were.

I think you were harsh to have a go at her, you probably made her feel sh*t in a situation where she was likely already on edge as flying with a baby isn't easy.

But sometimes toddlers can't make it to the toilet and it's a choice between whipping out the potty and them going in their pants...surely there is no other option?!

I have a potty training child and I'd 100% rather she pooed in the toilet, obviously, so I don't have to clear it up. But sometimes I have no option but to let her use the potty in the park etc otherwise she won't make it without an accident. Luckily this is usually wees for us but could easily be poos for others.

Why has this website because so parent hating? Honestly every day there’s a new thread where someone with no kids is berating a parent.

Obviously changing a nappy in the open is not ideal, but in a pinch, a quick change on a portable mat is no biggy. What’s the alternative, leave your baby with a dirty nappy until the plane has boarded and taken off and she could have got up to go to the aeroplane toilets? Sounds like a recipe for a miserable baby with a sore bum.

She changed the baby on the changing mat, not on the seat. The seat was protected.

OP said she changed the baby quickly. She no doubt wiped her hands with baby wipes and possibly hand sanitiser and bagged it all up securely. I know I did when I had to change a baby while out and about.

What do you think the mat is for? To provide a clean place to change a nappy and to protect other surfaces.

Ugh absolutely gross. I can't believe the number of people who voted that you were unreasonable.

I have three children and I’m sick of all the usual reasons being trotted out to excuse unhygienic, antisocial behaviour and defend lousy parents from well deserved criticism.

Go on then, seeing as you’re a perfect parent how would you have handled the situation? Because personally I’m not leaving my child covered in shit even if the alternative is making people uncomfy.

@HedwigEliza you sound like you’ve raised three very good humans! I’m certainly on board with everything you say.

Also, in general, I find it rather disrespectful to say to someone you don’t have kids you don’t understand, but I’m trying my hardest for the future to gain an insight!! As I’ve got Crohn’s disease, I don’t dare dream of saying to others you don’t have it so you don’t understand!!!!

Thinking about it the last time we flew DS had a nappy explosion during the flight. DH took him to change him in the tiny cubicle, full head to toe change of clothes, nappy and clean-up in a phone box sized space while DS was screaming, frightened of the noise. A long queue built up and there was much moaning about someone taking so long until I (at the back of the queue) put them straight. Can’t win 🤷🏻‍♀️

Actually I suppose people could just not fly with babies and children at all, but family holidays and trips to visit family are very big business for a lot of airlines, so expect less flights and higher fares without that part of the market.

@CheeseWisely it was the person at the back of the queue being very unreasonable and inconsiderate there!!!!! Well done for putting them in their place

Can´t get worked up about this. Not ideal but she used changing mat, quick change and that´s that. I always had hand sanitizer with me, so no need for taps.

OP now decides that as she’s got crohns disease she knows exactly how a mother must feel and reply’s to everyone using that defence. I have crohns too and 2 babies, it’s really not the same 🤣 just do better in future not to make new mothers in stressful situations feel like shit.