Muslim wives legally invisible

[ShowMeTheHunny]

Perhaps this should be in the feminism chat, but I’ve just found out something shocking: 60% of British Muslim women are in Nikah only marriages.

Nikah is a religious marriage ceremony. Unlike Jewish or Christian marriages, there is no automatic civil registration.

This means that under British law a Muslim woman with a Nikah marriage is in fact not married at all. If the relationship ends (through separation, divorce, or death), she has: no right to spousal maintenance, no claim to property or pensions, no inheritance rights and no access to the protections of the UK Family Court.

This has been raised in parliament. This has been raised by judges. The 2018 government review found that many Muslim women believed their Nikah marriage had legal standing.

Anything done about it? Nope.

I wondered if this is covered in schools. There is a statutory relationships and sex education guidance that the DfE published which schools must follow. It does require teaching about marriage, but NOTHING in the statutory wording prompts schools to explain the difference between a religious-only ceremony and a civilly recognised marriage.

So, many/most of you might be thinking, ‘So what? It’s none of our business to interfere with others’ religious or cultural practices! Surely it’s the same situation in other countries?’

Nope. The following countries ensure, through legislation, that Islamic marriage ceremonies happen after or alongside civil registration:

France, Germany, Netherlands, Belgium, Spain, Italy, Finland, Sweden….basically all the European countries….except Britain.

Anyway, anyone else shocked?

That’s a much bigger can of worms around why it’s women who end up vulnerable like that. Although there are also threads about cocklodgers who similarly have no rights - just gullible women accommodating them! 😂

PS

My very good friend had a Nikah only marriage - it worked well for her and only she came to the marriage with any property, and there were no children. She was able to end the marriage quickly and easily as a result.

My exh has a Christian only marriage (done in another country) which isn’t registered here. They live in his house but his partner has separate investments etc (I believe) to protect herself.

That's more common in Pakistan culture.

It does happen but it shouldn't be done one after the other, where every marriage in each generation are cousins.
One instance I know, my friend and her husband are cousins, his parents are cousins and her parents are cousins too, and married to each to each other. Their neighbours are also Pakistani and her husband is her cousin. And she told me her sister in law is also her cousin. It happens a lot there but when its constant that's when the birth defects and disabilitys occur.

Perhaps it's regionally specific, but I have never been to a single Catholic wedding where the priest was also the legal celebrant. There's always been a separate legal registrar present.

Priests are often pretty thinly spread these days, I can see how it would be attractive to just stick to the essential parts of the role and contract out what someone else can do.

Ah thank you - for some reason I thought rabbis were automatically registered too!

I got married in a Catholic Church so I was just going by what we had to do. And everyone Catholic wedding I’ve been to involved a separate registrar. Ours was lovely as it goes!

Some Muslims have 2 weddings
Nikah & UK wedding
Some Muslims have more than 1 wife

At least in Pakistan the government and health workers are much more upfront about cousin marriage. It’s talked about openly.

In some provinces, there are campaigns with posters and leaflets in hospitals and clinics explaining that marrying a cousin makes it more likely that children will have genetic problems. Some hospitals offer genetic counselling, and there have even been schemes where cousin couples are encouraged to do tests before marrying.

On TV and radio, sometimes dramas or adverts link cousin marriage to illnesses like thalassaemia, and the government has used TV spots to push premarital blood screening. NGOs are active too, running awareness events in schools and communities.

Here, the NHS has become very cautious about even mentioning it.

Well, if shes Muslim and the husband Muslim,it doesn't matter how she plans the funeral. After all, there's only one way to conduct an Islamic burial.

The men will wash his body in the mosque and then he will be wrapped in a white sheet style cloth and buried in the ground whilst everyone does a prayer for him to be granted heaven and be forgiven for any errors or sins he has made. And that's it. There's no arranging songs or ordering a fancy casket or choosing a cremation plot and urn. It's called a janazah.

We mention consanguinity at booking and tell people that we offer a slightly different pathway of care where it is relevant to screen for congenital abnormalities.

At midwife booking appointments they all have to ask as well as part of the questions on the NHS system, are you and your husband cousins?

Yes maybe, I haven’t been to a catholic wedding for about 10 years! After that we haven’t had any friends getting married. All the catholic priests we spoke to for our wedding could do a legal ceremony but that was probably just coincidence (pretty wedding worth venues!)

But yes, most churches I’ve visited in the last few years have had big problems getting priests.

Good to hear

https://www.culs.org.uk/per-incuriam/nikah-marriages-and-their-impact-on-muslim-women

Yes, that does happen now.
When I was registering my last baby born in 2023, in the waiting area of rhe registrynoffice there was a poster that said, if you have done a nikah marriage at the mosque, please ensure you do a legal registry wedding too, to be registered in the uk.

Some mosques are happy to conduct an Islamic wedding on its own. In the eyes of God, its the only marriage that is valid/necessary. If you wish to go ahead and do a registry office so youre recognised as a wife in British law you are free to do so but a lot dont. They're happy with a wedding at the mosque and see a religious wedding as suffice.

Totally agree with you, it should be taught in schools. I also think the benifits of marriage/civil partnership legally and financially would benefit everyone. A lot of ppl who are living with a partner long term do not realise how things can go wrong when a partner is injured or passed away. I do believe more ppl would get married if they knew the protections it offered, especially if they have children.

Nothing is stopping the Muslim couple from getting their marriage registered in a civil ceremony.

We are in the UK, and our laws should prevail. I don’t want Sharia Law given any legal standing here.

But I agree, although it’s the job of individuals and the community to be aware of the legal status of their practices, it would be sensible to cover this in PSHE lessons along with the rights and responsibilities of marriage in general.

Apologies, I should have made it clear. I wasn’t referring to the OP situation, I was talking about people in general who say “Marriage is just a piece of paper”. People from all religions, backgrounds and everything in between. Some people still believe the term ‘common law wife’ and it’s only when something happens that they realise how important a marriage certificate can be.

Mormons have many wives..
People of the bible even had 100s of wives.

The quran says have more than 1 wife if you are able to. But there's a tonne of rules. Also, a woman has the right to say at the wedding she wishes not to be a co wife and the man has to accept that. She can put that in the marriage contract and she can also say how much money she wants in a dowry.
In islam, a man can have a 2nd wife on the grounds of, it's not secret, they know of one another, you provide for both equally and spend equal time with them.

A friend of mine is a 2nd wife, she said it was tough at first but she said they got used to each other and now get along and all childrenplay together. They all live in the same household though and it is advised to have separate households for both. However, not all muslim men/women do this. A lot of people are happy with just one wife.

No need to apologise, friend 🌸

Yes, I hate the term : Marriage is just a piece of paper.

To me, its a serious commitment between man and woman who love one another.

As I said, I may have misconstrued Sharia Law. I shall watch the programme with interest in order to understand better.

Yes, that unfortunately does happen.
Married to a woman in the uk and has another "secret wife" back in Bangladesh for example.

Shouldn't be done.
If you are going to do co wife at least do it how the quran tells you. And if you can't be fair and just then just divorce and be on your bloody own.

Personally I think first-cousin marriage should be banned in the same way sibling and uncle/niece marriages are banned.

I have a Muslim friend (female) who has been married 3 times
She fully understands and chooses the Nikah only ceremony as it is easier to end the marriage and protects her personal wealth

Sounds nice.
Like your name BTW