Kids missed 3wks school, council taking me to court!

[Questionairballoon]

Hi all,

I am very unsure about what to do.

DC aged 6 and 8. I took them on holiday this summer. missed the last 3 weeks of school (July 2025).

For context, their attendance is always good. Only time they ever miss school is when poorly. They enjoy going. Last time we took them on holiday they were 3 and 5 and they missed maybe 2 weeks of nursery/school.

Before we left this time, I emailed the head teacher and spoke with the staff partly to apologise and also to find out what they might miss for the last 3 weeks so I could cover with them if needed. For what it’s worth, both kids do well in school. Teachers wished us happy hols and we left on a positive note.

The holiday was 2 weeks in Europe and 2 weeks in America. They had some fantastic experiences and got to meet relatives who live abroad. We were back in August, they had almost a month to recoup and then back to school business as usual!

We expected a fine but got nothing. This week, I’ve received a court order telling me to expect paperwork where I’ll be “pleading guilty or not guilty”.

I’m gobsmacked tbh. Has anyone been in this situation? Any advice at all? I don’t even know what to say!

Oh I wish something like this had happened when my two were at primary…. Would have made class drinks a bit more interesting!

and you’re going to need thick skin at drop off and collection OP! This will be the talk of the school gate

Does this kind of reply make people feel good? It just makes me wonder what’s gone wrong with our society. No empathy.

Absolutely. It is the easy targets.
I used to volunteer with teenagers in foster care, the parents of these kids rarely saw the inside of a courtroom. Yet, a family taking their children on a holiday once in 3yrs...

Christ!!! Leave the woman alone!!! Why are you so angry at a stranger on the Internet?? It's Friday night 😂
And I hardly think anyone at the school will really give a shit - unless of course they're as boring as you, and have nothing else going on in their own lives!

FYI - I'm a gypsy & take my kids out of school whenever I like!! 😜😜😜😅

I absolutely agree no rules would stop them, but you were saying the onus should be put on teachers to decide whether Anele's parents' request for a week off is valid or not. My point is, the previously model parents could be planning something like this but how is the teacher expected to guess?

Teachers are already expected to do and be so much in our children's lives. It's massively unfair to land the responsibility of deciding who gets extra time off on them too! Because guess who would get the blame if it did turn out Anele's parents took her for FGM surgery?

Are you really that sad & pathetic?

What do you want from this thread OP? Unfortunately unless you can come up with a reasonable defence against your charges then you’re going to end up with a criminal record - either by pleading guilty or being convicted at trial in a magistrate’s court.

A solicitor should be able to advise you on any defences that may be available to you, but I imagine they will have to pass quite a rigorous standard of legal test if they’re to be successful.

yes 😃

Is absenteeism the only thing a teacher shouldn’t be responsible for reporting?

I mean, there are plenty of other more nefarious things which a teacher may suspect is resulting in a negative impact on a child’s wellbeing. Should they keep quiet about those things to for fear of repercussions from an angry parent.

Poor nutrition? Sexual abuse? Physical abuse? Any health concerns?

Im sure become a teacher comes with the understanding that you are in a position of care and that may involve making some judgement about a parents behavior or character.

You’ve really got the OP’s back! 😆

Really. You can’t tell a kid who is going off on an holiday abroad with his family (language tutors arranged etc) and a kid who is a truant and his parents couldn’t give a shit where he is?

No. Not always. You really can't. Were language tutors arranged in this instance? I maybe missed that. But no. Not always. Appearances can be deceptive.

But I'm not trying to throw a sinister light on OP who seems genuinely gobsmacked that her holiday is being turned into a court case. It's a rude awakening, and one that could have been predicted without the l' aissez faire
attitude of some parents in their commitment to doing their part in the free at the point of use education for their children, i.e. making sure their children attend school when not ill or otherwise incapable.

A 3 week holiday is catered for within the summer school holidays.
It's more expensive then, as it is for all of us. But it's not forever. Most of us manage to stay within that boundary because we accept the the rules apply to everyone.

One of my children attends a special school. She is non verbal and doubly incontinent. I imagine (not entirely sure) that I'm under the same obligation as every other parent - that she attends school and there are minimal absences for illness etc. I suppose in our case, if she was absent from school then a very lot of questions would be asked.

The other children are doing fine at school and I want things to remain that way so I wouldn't pull them out for a quarter of the term.

And I really disagree that a child with moneyed parents being taken off for a 3 week exotic holiday in foreign climes (with tutors) should be given a pass, whilst a child who lives with less wealthy parents should be denied the same opportunity to visit his elderly grandparents in Newcastle, for example. For 3 weeks. I mean, why not?! Newcastle is as unattainable as Antigua for some of us.

Same thing. He might never see them again. Long way from from the South East where we all seem to live nowadays. So all in all, no sympathy because I wouldn't have assumed it was OK to do.

And just one more time. This is a law. Laws must apply to everyone, not just the feckless parents. That’s how laws work.

Actually, that's not how laws work. The one time shoplifter is not treated in the same way as the serial offender who fences his wares down the local pub. There is flexibility within the law.

I would never take my DC out of school for a holiday, but I do understand why some do if it means this is the only way of having a holiday they can afford. But to take them out for 3 weeks seems absolutely insane to me and I think it shows that you are not prioritising your children's education. You knew the rules and chose to break them, so now you must face the consequences.

You just come across as a jealous little gremlin is all. I'm wondering where it's coming from. V odd.....

No idea why you did this.
It’s an extremely long time out of school.

But the law doesn't apply to everyone because it is up to schools who gets referred or not. Schools already have that responsibility.

I absolutely did not say the onus should be on the teacher to report ALL absenteeism. I said that if such absenteeism was affecting the well being of the child then the teacher would know if it was negatively affecting a child.

Seems like a lot of posters here simply see parenting, teaching and raising children as a tick box exercise with a one size fits all approach.

Families are different and children are different and the overall well being of each individual child should trump a law for all.

🤦🏻‍♀️

Yes of course they have a duty of care to report suspicions of neglect. That’s not what we’re talking about though. Whether or not a child should be going on holiday is absolutely nothing to do with a teacher and shouldn’t be something they’re expected to get involved with. It opens them up to all sorts of issues.

Oh for fucks sake.

Did your parents take you out of school for long periods of time. You seemed to have missed a lot of comprehension classes.

Changed by a department that regulates teaching and social work.
I feel for her in some ways as a Mum but professionally finding this very difficult. There's no insight or reflection. Just constant justification why she was right.
People have exaggerated this. She will not be attending court, she is filling paperwork to be dealt a fine. People saying she is going to jail etc etc and all the criminal record stuff are taking this too far. She should be honest with her employers but it's a court enforced fine. It's not recorded as child neglect. Honestly people need to stop saying the state is out to get us.
It will say she has a court enforced fine.
Yes you get that also for speeding, not paying creditors.
She should be honest with her employers but I don't understand people who say this is over the top. We all get charged. If I went over my credit card or didn't pay bills or parked longer than I should I might get a fine. Itay end up at a magistrates court to be enforced and I might have to fill in paperwork. Just accept the penalty. It's been a nice holiday. It was in error you knew you could be fined and you will be.
I'm beginning to feel this can't be real. First a teacher, then a social worker. Sorry just accept it's happened.
You will not be sent to jail without passing go, you will not be fined were you cannot afford to pay the fine. So just please calm and breathe. You are not being made an example of...though if people know who you are, then the press probably would. So just accept it's been a bit too long, you knew it was going to end up with a fine.
I don't think the victim mentality that is coming through is fair. This is life.
Also the holiday companies & airlines are disgusting. We should not take children out of school for excessively long holidays without arranging and agreeing. The school and LA are doing a job. One they have to in order to protect children. They have to send data on absence. It's on every bit of school letters. You all know this is law. Don't blame schools and LAs or the court for ridiculous pricing. We should make law that Center Parcs etc all these places should not be hiking prices like this. These places are disgusting not the schools, LAs or Courts. They are hardworking people that also would like to take their children away in the 13 weeks a year children are not in school and be able to afford to do it.
You will anger and isolate people who are proportionate and rational.

This is not something I would have done, but I know plenty of parents that would/have. We are currently living in the US and they don't fine for missing school where we are. Maybe attendance would be better if they did.

Which was my point. I cant afford to visit family over seas in the summer, and have not been for many years - you wait til you can afford it, not disrupt things just to save money.

I paid for an online tutor (even for extra things like Languages as my children are being realised bilingual) during the entire time we were off and this includes the month before school started when we were at home
OK. So you're posh and have loads of money so rules don't apply to you.

Gottit

I would try to contact the Education Welfare service within your LA. Progressing to court really should be an absolute last response, and they may be able to help if you work with them and give the reassurance it won’t happen again.

OP - sorry if this has been said already. Does the letter mention if this is prosecuted under section 444(1) or 444(1A)? The difference is the first one is not a recordable offence. If the letter doesn’t say, you can check with the council.
Sorry you’re getting so much crap here - taking the children out for 3 weeks is obvs not good, but the response is disproportionate. Good luck