Kids missed 3wks school, council taking me to court!

[Questionairballoon]

Hi all,

I am very unsure about what to do.

DC aged 6 and 8. I took them on holiday this summer. missed the last 3 weeks of school (July 2025).

For context, their attendance is always good. Only time they ever miss school is when poorly. They enjoy going. Last time we took them on holiday they were 3 and 5 and they missed maybe 2 weeks of nursery/school.

Before we left this time, I emailed the head teacher and spoke with the staff partly to apologise and also to find out what they might miss for the last 3 weeks so I could cover with them if needed. For what it’s worth, both kids do well in school. Teachers wished us happy hols and we left on a positive note.

The holiday was 2 weeks in Europe and 2 weeks in America. They had some fantastic experiences and got to meet relatives who live abroad. We were back in August, they had almost a month to recoup and then back to school business as usual!

We expected a fine but got nothing. This week, I’ve received a court order telling me to expect paperwork where I’ll be “pleading guilty or not guilty”.

I’m gobsmacked tbh. Has anyone been in this situation? Any advice at all? I don’t even know what to say!

I didn’t say they should investigate I said they should flag a safeguarding concern the same way they would any other safeguarding concern. But I am outside the school system so genuinely happy for you to explain why this is different.

That seems to be harsh straight off, when you've not had previous fines. Is it that when you go over 2 weeks it leapfrogs straight to a court?
You need to let the course leader / university know asap about this. Better they hear from you before the event than when your name is flagged for having a record.

I suggest you read the relevant parts of the law pertaining to this before you spout utter garbage.

There has to be a serious consequence for the most serious cases of absenteeism because if the punishment was capped at just a fine, parents would abuse the system even more. Those three weeks might not see like much now but your eldest will likely have missed key parts of the curriculum that they'll need for sitting their SATs. My DP is a primary teacher and he just said it's only the last two days of term in Y5 when they stop curriculum lessons because there's so much to get through ready for SATs.

Oh you are hilarious. Please do enlighten us with your educated take on how OP can avoid a criminal conviction now.

Oh please. Are you really comparing OP 's situation to those, who for varying reasons fail to send their children to school?

I think you were hoping for people to agree with you and blast off about the intervention of the state with family life. But, quite frankly, I think you've lost the plot entirely. It is a privilege to be in school. Many kids come from families that don't see school as a privilege, skive off as they see many/any other activities as more valuable.

You see yourself as different than other families whose kids miss school. You see your reason for missing school as reasonable.

But it's not.

Many people say - if you don't like it, go live elsewhere. Quite frankly, I agree. The country is trying to embed an ethos in people that education matters. And it's a vitally important public policy as many families wouldn't send their kids to school if it did not exist.

Middle class families saying they are not "like" those other families and will pay fines to go on "holiday" make a mockery of the purpose of the value.

I don't imagine this was your intention. And I am sorry if you end up with a criminal record from this. But, honestly, why did you think you'd be exempt from the consequence any other parent would have from such a prolonged absence?!

OP you don’t seem to be taking much responsibility for what you did here. I’m sure you didn’t do it with any ill-intent and I’m sure you did whatever you could for your kids with the tutoring etc. I think you may have missed the point though, most of us have a reason to take our kids out of school for a chunk of time but we don’t. I have family abroad and I have young kids so realistically it wouldn’t make a whole lot of difference to them if I did take them out of school for 3 weeks, but I’m not going to because it’s prohibited end of story.
I wouldn’t say a day or two is a problem but I’d be stressing out about that anyway let alone 3 weeks. So most of us should stick to the rules but you shouldn’t is a bit how it’s coming across?
You seem to genuinely not have known about the consequences, so hopefully the court will go easy on you and that it doesn’t have any impact for the future. I think you should probably just own up to making a mistake and fingers crossed you’ll be able to move on and put it behind you.

But that's the law in the UK!

Yes indeed

She will have to support families to understand the value of education

I'm really glad teachers in my children's school don't stop the register to say anyone know why X isn't here. Or after class email the Head and LA to say I think it's ok x,y,z is at Disneyland. What kind of workload are you expecting in addition to them actually genuinely safeguarding children.
I've worked with alcoholic parents very well heeled that have taken children out of school so they don't bump into people and get slaughtered on the normal holiday times. Also known a child that uncle did some not nice things on a fancy trip abroad. This ridiculous notion that going away for 3 is acceptable holiday that is enriching (Disneyland ok) and the law is there to protect children. Had OP gone to the head before hand. then it might not have escalated but knowing policy she still just took off and sent an email having taught in schools and knowing the law.
Noone is doubting this could have been an important holiday, time with family so why not speak to your head of school and get it marked as an authorised absence - instead arrogantly send an email, expect everyone to do a lot more work and get out any repercussions.

Now wanting to be a social worker.
Both professions are expected to uphold these laws and also fundamentally grasp their importance and the impact they have made in protecting children. I'd be more worried about her ability to protect. If she feels laws should bend to her in this instance. I don't think she has any professional insight to either profession.

Quite

I think the burden of proof is on you in the case I'm afraid. Enjoy.

Just seen this on the homepage - thought to give heads up
Brother and sister in law done similar 2 years ago, nieces were 9 and 10 (almost 11 last year of primary)
They never told us how bad there attendance was, the only reason why my parents found out was because my brother asked my dad to borrow him 4k to pay the fine, so attendance must have been shite!
Went on holiday for 2 weeks, just before the end of school, I remember it was my mum's 70th and they were in Florida (13th July) so missed the party.
We are in London, Bexley LA
No criminal record as far as I believe.

Just a heads up, they don't mess around.
2/3 days I get but weeks!!!

I genuinely cba replying to all the assumptions about how I don’t care about education or fail as a parent. I know it’s not true and I’m not going to justify it to random internet strangers.

i just wanted to know if (1) it’s normal to be sent straight to court (2) how I should handle this (3) the legal side of things

My volunteer work has seen me support probably hundreds of families right now, most of whom are very vulnerable and have complex issues. I know what “children at risk” look like.

I did not expect to be exempt, I expected to be FINED. I am only shocked at the criminal record part of this. That’s all. HTH.

You see yourself as different than other families whose kids miss school. You see your reason for missing school as reasonable.
But it's not.

Who are we to to determine what's reasonable? Family and travel are reasonable to some.

I think people are getting mixed up with schooling and education. The OP was willing to facilitate her children's education during this time off. She asked for the new topics that would be covered.

Though I do agree that she should have fully understood the repercussions of her decision.

Absenteeism is the remit of the LEA because it's a criminal matter – parents have a legal duty to ensure their children attend school. The class register is therefore a legal document of record, so when teachers fill them in online morning and afternoon, the data is automatically forwarded to the LEA. Persistent absenteeism is then flagged by the system and an investigation activated, which of course the teacher would be involved it if further information was sought. Teachers might take it upon themselves to have a word with a parent if a pupil had been off with a lot of sickness, but the actual pursuing of parents for absenteeism is, rightly, done by the LEA based on the class register.

The syllabus is rammed. They won't be doing the most important maths topics in July, but we were covering the curriculum until two days before the end of term. In the last three weeks we did writing assignments that consolidated the skills developed throughout the year, and lots of foundation subject content, as well as the RSE module in PSHE.

I'll bet there will be some teacher on here who applauds your decision, as there always seems to be, but for the record, I think it was a shit idea.

Hopefully you won't end up with a record and will still be able to visit those friends in the US...

So much boohoo over ID cards and then the same people are all pompous over someone taking their own children on holiday. The UK is nuts

I’d do three things. I’d research on various forums whether others were in a similar situation. I’d use my husband’s experience as I described upthread and called the council. And if I were really worried, I’d fork out some money and see a solicitor.

My DDs teacher had 3 MONTHS off school when she split up with her husband, she was on social media during this time posting pics of her trips to NYC and Paris.

I could not believe it, and the school didn’t have a leg to stand on after that point with parents in their class taking the children out for a holiday or for a day out.

That being said, 3 weeks is a lot.

Well don’t break the law and then dont ask for advice about breaking the law from random internet strangers

When I say research, I mean - not only actively by asking the question, but also by googling it. I’m almost certain there would be something on the platform whose name begins with R (not sure if we can name here competing resources haha)

How is your eldest in year 5/6 if in 2022 he was in nursery and not compulsory education

And OP people have given you websites to check, organisations that give accurate information and also explained processes, like you are not automatically getting a criminal record but you've constantly pushed back, said it's wrong and stated why as a former teacher and wanting to be a social worker. I think if you had accepted views and not hit back at people you would get more empathy. You've been sarcastic to people who feel for you and are trying to help. If course you will enrage people when you show no insight and keep saying you're getting a criminal record.
Please get advice off the forum. You've been given plenty. I must say I wonder if the school are just exacerbated with you as a parent because it does seem you are very entrenched in what you feel is right.