To say that boys are better at high standard maths

[MellowRubyDreamer]

My daughter is choosing her subjects for senior and her teacher is encouraging her to choose the hardest maths subject. Not in the UK. DD is good at maths at her girls' school but ultimately she will also be competing with the boys.

I am not saying boys are better at maths but they are better at high standard maths in proportion. Like for example in maths competition/olympiad the prizes are often dominated by boys. DD can choose as she pleases but I am just offering her perspective. She can do just as well but she might need to work harder. She thinks I am being sexist. AIBU?

She gets emotional easily and sometimes gets upset when she can't solve something.

Let’s ignore the late night goady poster, that is new here with one of those 3 word user names. 🙄

Why does she need to ‘compete’ with anyone, boy or girl?

Well said, and I second the sentiment.

I went to school with so many girls who went on to do degrees in engineering, physics, etc - in Ireland in the 70s/80s.

The only problem wrt girls and maths is people peddling myths about how unfit for it they are.

There's no such thing as a natural maths brain. There are people who have had the confidence knocked out of them and people who have had their confidence boosted. There are parents who put up with poor maths teaching for girls and parents who rightly demand better.

Imagine if Hannah Fry’s parents had told her not to bother pursuing maths, because she would have to compete with all the clever boys. What a waste of her talent that would have been.

What things come more naturally to girls and their soft little brains?

Things like languages perhaps

Because her final mark would be determined as a percentile which is competition with everyone else.

how is that related to sex and not just individual personality?

It is both.

This has to be a joke or wind up thread 😂. Good effort!

It seems like your daughter is more intelligent than you think, as she already knows her mother is talking complete nonsense.
You should be ashamed as a mother and a woman.

So does my DD - who has a physics degree.

and her girlfriend - who also has a physics degree and now works for the UKAEA creating mathematical models for fusion reactors.

newsflash, people have emotions. More as we get it.

you are sexist.

I agree wholeheartedly with your post.

For fuck’s sake. What a load of drivel.

The only thing your daughter has to compete with is her parents' sexist attitude.

Also, boys get upset too when they can't do something - it's just that things like anger and frustration have been cleverly rebranded as not 'emotional' when they come from men, so it's not seen as negative.

Did you go to a coed school by any chance?

I went to a girls school for secondary (age 11+) and one of the advantages is that you don’t learn sexist stereotypes like boys are better at maths.

There were as many girls who went on to read subjects like chemical engineering and computer science as French Literature and Music. This is an English school that makes the top 10 nationally every year for decades.

It’s pretty sad that you see success as winning Olympiads and competitions rather than enjoying the challenge of learning more advanced work. The teacher will have the best idea of your DD’s capabilities and by voicing your dated and sexist idea, you have set dd up to fail if she chooses the course and finds some topics hard. She will have your negative and critical voice saying that she’s a girl so shouldn’t have picked maths “I told you so” rather than an encouraging one urging her to get help from teachers because she’s smart and capable.

It’s ok to get upset when you don’t achieve. Boys also get frustrated and it’s not a sign of weakness. Your dd wants to understand and cares- they are good signs that she’s motivated. Do you think people like Olympic athletes don’t get upset when they can’t run faster, jump further etc? Try a carrot and not a stick- you should be the person building your DD’s self esteem and not stomping on it.

Fellow woman with Maths and Further Maths A-levels at grade A (no A* in the 90s) and who taught herself A-level Statistics (grade A) during her gap year so she could get a place at dream uni.

Haha omg you can’t be for real

Yes it’s true that boys are better at spatial reasoning (you’ll never get Mumsnet to understand this, but it’s true and why boys are over-represented at math and physic competitions, and particularly East Asian boys are best at it)

BUT if this post is for real, this is a stupid reason to discourage your daughter. The vast majority of us will NEVER be good at math, male or female. The vast majority of us will never be at the tippy top of the field. Doesn’t mean we should just give it all up and stack boxes in trucks or whatever.

Besides, it will be more useful if she wants to pursue a high-paying stem career and (trust me) she doesn’t want to play catch up with this stuff in college if her field requires heavy math.

My DD is amazing at maths (applying to oxford next month) but definitely more boys that do it. She has attended a few oxford run events aimed to bring more girls into maths.

WTAF. I know someone else has mentioned Hannah Fry already. But, again OP, the President of the UK's chartered professional body for mathematicians is a woman. I am really saddened, and baffled, by your thought process. Your poor daughter.

You are being sexist. Boys aren’t better at math than girls. Why would you think that?

Statistics tell us girls perform better academically than boys in single sex schools. Girls are not the issue here OP.

Of course she can be an ace mathematician. She doesn't need to work harder than boys with a similar innate ability.

However, through nature or nurture I dont know, but maths is more boy heavy generally.
Even at 14, DS2 reports his top set maths group is very boy heavy, and his top set English class is very girl heavy.

Thank heavens my parents didn't discourage me from my STEM academics and career. I'd have been miserable in an arts field! Let her do what she enjoys and excels at!

She gets emotional easily and sometimes gets upset when she can't solve something. so does my DS and he's fabulous at maths. Him getting upset is about his resilience/emotional regulation, not his maths skills

This is so depressing. I encountered attitudes a bit like this nearly 40 years ago, and I'm still angry about it now, but I really thought we had moved on.

Poor girl, it must be devastating when it's coming from your own parent.