School residential vegetarian/vegan only

[vgp1234]

My child had really been looking forward to their year 6 residential, but a new head has joined and had changed the format somewhat.

They have now booked a Sustainability Centre in Hampshire, which only caters for vegetarians and vegans. My child is not a vegetarian or vegan, and across the cohort of year 5 and 6 only one child is vegetarian.

While I appreciate that there is a view that they can go 5 days without meat and they should just suck it up, I find it incredibly frustrating that you would not ask a vegetarian or vegan child to suck it up and eat meat for 5 days. So I don't understand why we do not treat both dietary preferences with equal measure.

The new head is very keen on government guidance, and has changed our lunch menu to comply with the current guidance for school lunches which is that 3 days should include meat or fish (previously we had a meat and vegetarian/vegan option every day). However it seems this guidance only applies on the school site, so you can disregard it at a residential. While they are within their rights to do this, it does seem like quite a contradiction.

I have tried speaking to the Sustainability centre directly but they were very inflexible and just stated it is a against their ethos (may I add that they also offer a day trip at a cost to visit a working farm, who rear animals for meat, so their ethos does not run all that deep). This really goes against my ethos as not only do I think you should treat all groups equally, I can't help but feel that this is forcing their ideas on children verses allowing them free choice and the ability to hear both viewpoints (meat is unsustainable/sustainable) and make their own decision.

In all honesty I'm quite perplexed as to why the school choose the venue when it would clearly be controversial, as this is quite a personal choice for parents and the cohort has so few in it that have this dietary preference.

I'm sure some people will not agree with me, and I am open to your opinions as I'm a big believer in hearing both sides of the argument and our ability to think critically for ourselves and not be told what to think (I want this for my child too).

I do plan to send the school an email initially and request that they provide a rounded menu including meat. But I'd really appreciate any advice on how to word this appropriately as I'm quite upset by it, and I'd prefer to send a well worded email than an emotional one.

I'm a meat eater and I think yabu. Their diets probably contain only a small proportion of meat anyway, unless they're eating eg sausages for breakfast, chicken breast at lunch and lamb chops for dinner every day without much else. Most of what kids eat will probably still be available - cereal, toast, potatoes, rice, pizza, fruit, veg etc. They can definitely manage (and enjoy!) a few days without meat.

@VickyEadieofThigh I agree with your main points but I am not sure that eating a vegetarian diet makes you have a more sophisticated palate.

I have a child with a similarly limited diet and I've just had to accept that they will be hungry a lot of the time.

If the menu was really challenging for them, I'd talk to the teacher about sending some jam sandwiches (happily vegan since my child hates butter 😆) just so they can eat something.

I know a lot about neurodiversity.

I do not believe that your child is incapable of eating anything except meat based dishes. They aren't going to starve by just eating basic food for a few days, even if it's not their favourite food.

It's completely unreasonable because there is NO CHILD out there who only eats meat. EVERY SINGLE child will eat something that's suitable for a vegetarian, even if that's only bread, and I assure you, a child can survive perfectly fine for 5 days on bread. Most of humanity has done so for all of history.

If you want schools to just stop running residentials then keep on kicking up a fuss about stupid things.

Have the day you deserve.

This last line is such a good point. If they were abroad and offered insects (as I have been) or meat from animals we don’t typically eat in the UK (say, horse in France or dog in parts of Asia) I think you would also object. Which suggests your concern is your child having familiar (safe, to them) foods available and knowing they’ll be suitably fed and nourished.

is the trip to the farm to show the kids where meat comes from? As lots of kids are ignorant to this and i suspect if they knew they wouldn’t want to eat it!

My thought process on this is actually cost and convenience.

A residential centre which only offers vegetarian options will be cheaper. Its MUCH cheaper to feed people without meat. Its also less at risk of food poisoning issues. As well as having obvious advantages for religious considerations.

There is a lot to be said for this.

I've just done a meal for a large number of people. I did do meat, but i also had to cater for a number of dietary issues. Going almost veggie made a massive difference for a variety of reasons.

My son, barely eats veg, but I suspect a residential where he had no choice would be of benefit to him. He is super fussy. Veggie food done well is epic. If you do veggie only, you generally have to raise your game precisely because of fussy kids...

I think you'll find that if children are with their friends on a residential, they will eat what's put in front of them, even if it's different from what they get at home - mine did. The place will be able to do better on their budget if they don't have to include meat, presumably, unless it's that awful recovered stuff which is pumped with colourings and preservatives. I'd be happy if they were getting freshly cooked vegetarian meals instead.

Is your child only able to eat meat and nothing else? No?
Well then your comparison is void.
If you want to teach your child to think critically, send them on the trip and see what they make of it.

Mine wouldn't go. Though he can't go on residentials anyway but if he could, he wouldn't be going on one when he'd largely be hungry for 5 days.

He eats a ham sandwich every day for his packed lunch at school. Jam is also a no go.

As a vegetarian I have been to plenty of places with poor or no vegetarian choices, I would have to choose whether to go or not, I have never fought the establishment or seen it as an entitlement. It is not going to harm anyone to go without meat for 5 days. As meat eaters have vegetables as part of their diet anyway, it can’t be compared to a vegetarian being forced to eat meat! I would ask your son if he wants to go and if so it means having vegetarian food for a few days.

veg/vegan is likely cheaper and it also means not having to work out meals to offer options of halal meat or for dairy intolerances etc. it might be what allows the organisation to survive financially. And it is a sustainability centre! Have a read about meat and sustainability.
Veg is pretty healthy in any event and most kids need to eat more of it. Maybe they’ll try some stuff they haven’t tried before. Maybe they’ll hate it but I think they’ll survive. I think you are making a mountain out of a molehill. It’s one week. I don’t know what you want the school to do. Change venue? Champion the case of meat eaters? Tell the venue they need to change their ethos? The only thing that I see as bring tricky, and this would apply anywhere is kids that have real difficulty with certain types of food for health reasons etc/neurodiversity etc. I assume your kids eat some vegetables? I don’t think you are challenging any principle, you are just stoking up ‘why do we have to bend to the minority’ sentiment instead of just looking at the bigger (and sustainability) picture. Why not let you kids do something different, learn something different about food.

At least it won't be prematurely short because I have a diet that consists of only meat and panic if I'm served anything else.

So if your child has

Eggs on toast, cereal, fruit, yoghurt for breakfast
Cheese and Tomato sandwich + Fruit for lunch
Veggie lasagna + garlic bread for dinner

insert
Macaroni Cheese
margarita pizza
Hot chips
Veggie stir-fry
Pumpkin soup & crusty bread
Crisps
Porridge & Berries
Muffins
Pancakes

Why would this be a problem. I think you are creating an issue needlessly. The kids probably won't even notice.

Unless your child is a cat I think they will be ok

Absolutely get your point on the meat likely to be low quality. I would much prefer my daughter ate vegetarian at school due to this, but all vege options seem to be bulked out with gluten and she is coeliac. But you cannot get away from vegan substitutes being more processed in many cases. Quick look in my fridge. My daughters and my dairy milk contains 1 ingredient - milk. My husbands almond milk (dairy intolerant) contains a load of stabilisers, emulsifiers salt, sugar. Our cheese contains - milk, thats it. His fake cheese contains at least 10 ingredients including salt, preservatives,colourings etc.

Saying all that, I do think OP is being excessive, and a vegetarian diet for a week is fine.

A vegetarian diet is healthier, more ethical and far more economical too. I cannot be doing with people who think they are entitled to eat meat at most meals in this day and age. I admire what your school is doing and think it is an excellent way of modelling a healthier lifestyle (physically, ethically, environmentally) for young children for a temporary time.

Are you joking, ‘forcing their ideas on children’?? How WONDERFUL your child gets the opportunity to learn about sustainability, try out different food, and to learn about different perspectives on this. This is something you don’t want for your child? Honestly I have no words!

I can see why your daughter might be disappointed and find the choice a little limited, however it is not the same as asking a vegetarian to eat meat. School trips are an opportunity for children to step out of their comfort zone and experience new things.

Presumably, given this place only caters for vegetarian & vegan, your DD is going to be exposed to a range of flavours she wouldn’t necessarily get to try at home. (Heaven forbid, she might quite enjoy some of it).
Your DD isn’t going to be treated differently or miss out - everyone will be offered the same food. In fact, arguably it’s more inclusive. It’s not just vegetarians that don’t eat meat, any children following halal or kosher diets are also included in the main meal selections.

I had a work away day arranged a few years back. The person organising it was vegan and had chosen a site that only provided vegan meals. She thought it was a super inclusive thing to do. Not for me. I cannot eat soya. Much vegan protein is soya based. They used soya oil for cooking, the bread contained soya so most things were off limits to me. I had a 'tasty' protein free, dry salad. They couldn't (for reasons I don't understand) even pop a few chickpeas into it. I drank black coffee (only soya substitute milk drink available) to keep me going through the day.

I’m not a vegan or a vegetarian. But one of the most rage inducing MN perennials is the “Why shouldn’t vegetarians eat meat for a week if meat eaters are expected to eat vegetarian food for a week?” I can only assume it’s disingenuous because nobody could possibly be stupid enough to actually think that seriously.

YABVVU and lacking in imagination.

Everyone can eat vegetarian and vegan food. No human being is solely carnivorous for medical, [and yes it's rare but I know someone who cannot tolerate animal protein- it makes him sick] ethical or religious reasons.

As others have said many non vegetarians opt to be "vegetarian" in mass catering situations - either for religious reasons for an easy life or in my case because I don't eat chicken, turkey or pork at all and only eat other meat if I know its provenance.

Omitting meat here will mean omitting the lowest quality, cheapest meat and poultry.

It's only more inclusive to vegetarians and vegans. I wouldn't say it was more inclusive in general as some neurodiverse children, children with allergies and other children with limited diets would be more likely to struggle when food options become more limited.