School residential vegetarian/vegan only

[vgp1234]

My child had really been looking forward to their year 6 residential, but a new head has joined and had changed the format somewhat.

They have now booked a Sustainability Centre in Hampshire, which only caters for vegetarians and vegans. My child is not a vegetarian or vegan, and across the cohort of year 5 and 6 only one child is vegetarian.

While I appreciate that there is a view that they can go 5 days without meat and they should just suck it up, I find it incredibly frustrating that you would not ask a vegetarian or vegan child to suck it up and eat meat for 5 days. So I don't understand why we do not treat both dietary preferences with equal measure.

The new head is very keen on government guidance, and has changed our lunch menu to comply with the current guidance for school lunches which is that 3 days should include meat or fish (previously we had a meat and vegetarian/vegan option every day). However it seems this guidance only applies on the school site, so you can disregard it at a residential. While they are within their rights to do this, it does seem like quite a contradiction.

I have tried speaking to the Sustainability centre directly but they were very inflexible and just stated it is a against their ethos (may I add that they also offer a day trip at a cost to visit a working farm, who rear animals for meat, so their ethos does not run all that deep). This really goes against my ethos as not only do I think you should treat all groups equally, I can't help but feel that this is forcing their ideas on children verses allowing them free choice and the ability to hear both viewpoints (meat is unsustainable/sustainable) and make their own decision.

In all honesty I'm quite perplexed as to why the school choose the venue when it would clearly be controversial, as this is quite a personal choice for parents and the cohort has so few in it that have this dietary preference.

I'm sure some people will not agree with me, and I am open to your opinions as I'm a big believer in hearing both sides of the argument and our ability to think critically for ourselves and not be told what to think (I want this for my child too).

I do plan to send the school an email initially and request that they provide a rounded menu including meat. But I'd really appreciate any advice on how to word this appropriately as I'm quite upset by it, and I'd prefer to send a well worded email than an emotional one.

Does your neurodiverse child only eat meat? That's not very healthy and you should probably work on that.

They don't eat rice, pasta, bread, cereal, any fruit, any dairy, eggs or any vegetables?

Most children- even neurodiverse ones- eat some sort of carbohydrates and some vegetables.

The war time point is that they didn’t die from starvation , they didn’t faint from lack of food , they suffered no ill effects , on the contrary they were healthier as a result

who wouldn’t want their child to be healthy? To lean healthier eating habits ?

Exactly.

Unless you are providing a number of different dishes every night for your little darling to choose from, they will have more choice than you provide at home as there will be different options at the residential.

There won't be a choice that includes meat or fish, but they will have more choice not less.

I wouldn’t have a particular problem with the veggie/vegan only options for a five day residential.

It’s the fact that they are almost certainly doing this because they think it will help reduce carbon emissions. If they wanted to do that they should forbid groups arriving in a big diesel fuelled coach

Most of what your child eats now is already vegetarian or vegan, unless you feed them solely on meat and fish. There will be nothing on the menu that they cannot or should not eat, which would not be the case if a vegan was forced to eat meat or fish.

What do you think vegans eat? Special 'Frankenstein' food? Bongo beans? It's mostly normal everyday stuff, but without the animal bits. Maybe some tofu here and there, but that's a fairly normal foodstuff for many people.

Given that current and projected meat and dairy production is not environmentally sustainable, it would be inconsistent for a 'sustainability centre' to offer it.

Unless there is only one dish on the menu for each meal, there is a choice. Even if this was the case, the OP’s child still has a choice - the choice to go or not.

I voted YANBU but thinking about it id need to see the menu before deciding. Are there plenty of options for each day? I am vegi myself and had to live off smash for my residentual. My daughter eats a lot of meat and would probably struggle though

being environmentally aware doesn’t mean sack cloth and ashes - it means making sensible choices that minimise your footprint without majorly affect your life quality

so yes the kids get to go on a residential - the dubs but - and the carbon footprint of that is minimised by them not eating meat . Since they are all sharing a bus that will be lower footprint than staying at home and eating meat

They eat some vegetables on a plate that has meat with it. Otherwise, no, they struggle.

I don't think my message was particularly triggering in terms of getting a lecture on health.

I'm a registered nurse. I really don't need dictating on meal choices. Cheers curtain twitchers.

For goodness sake, it's no big deal. We are not vegetarians, but I wouldn't have any problem with this whatsoever. That aside, the way minced beef has soared in price recently, the cost of the trip would likely be double if meat were included on the menu, so surely it's a more inclusive approach.

Only the option to eat meat for 4 nights and 5 days.

Not her whole life!

And I bet they will be asked to take a packed lunch for the first day (travelling) so she can send her Dc with a sausage roll and a chicken sandwich. And be waiting with a big grilled steak after 4 nights of other foods.

Loads of 'choices' will be 'taken away' on a residential: a bedroom of your own, bed time and getting up time won't be of the child or parents choice, etc etc.

Though I imagine it is only a matter of time before some parent demands a different bed time or a lie in for their child....

Vegetarian basically means they just won’t serve meat or fish, will check that cheese doesn’t contain animal rennet and avoid anything with gelatine. That’s kind of it, really. That still basically leaves every single other food you can think of open. They can have potatoes, pasta, rice, beans, bread, dairy, eggs, sweets, puddings, ice cream . . .

I’m not going to touch the ‘it’s the same as making vegans eat meat’ argument because that’s patent nonsense. But by way of reassurance, your child may even get to try some new foods, which is surely great if you truly want them to make up their own mind about things? Of course you could always stick to your principles and not let them go if you still feel strongly. That would be an overreaction, but you have the right to overreact if you want to.

Nrtft but a huge part of sustainability is eating less meat.

If you're a nurse then you should know that it's not normal or healthy for your children to refuse to eat unless there's meat on their plate, so it sounds like you do need a lecture on food choices.

It is not the same thing - meat eaters still eat vegetables, vegetarians cannot eat meat. You are being quite ridiculous OP, it won't hurt DC to go without nuggets for 5 days.

A great amount of learning takes place on your 'typical PGL thing' Often learning experiences not available in a 'classroom'

It sounds like you need a lecture on neurodiversity

The OP did not mention allergies or neurodiversity in her OP as her reasons for objecting to a menu without meat for 4 nights.

For children who already have limited diets, it just limits them even more which is what would make it such a struggle.

Mine can eat eggs and can also eat pasta/bread but only white, not wholemeal. Dairy is fine but only some veggies which has to be cooked, no salad and very limited fruit. Some cereal but usually rice krispies/coco pops type, not cheerios or weetabix.

No beans/pulses which I think would be used a lot with 5 days and lots of children to feed.

I am ND and so is my whole family, that doesn't mean we hurl a plate at a wall because it doesn't have a steak on it.

YANBU petty and unreasonable. Your child will do well with a vegetarian diet for 5 days. I’m assuming he enjoys grains, vegetables? It’s hardly an alien diet, it’s probably already 70% of what he eats.

Dont be “that” parent.

This is what I don’t understand. I could feel about potatoes the way some meat eaters feel about meat. I could say that every time I wasn’t able to order potatoes at a restaurant or a hotel or a buffet that my choices were being taken away. ‘Where are the potatoes?!’ I could cry, baffled and affronted.

But meat and fish are the only things being left out here. Everything else is still, literally, on the table. If there isn’t meat just have something else. Like I do when there aren’t potatoes.

I think many children would barely notice the lack of meat unless the parents make a big thing of it

This. We took our cub pack camping at the weekend. We did have meat options - bacon at breakfast, ham for sandwiches at lunch, meatballs with pasta for dinner etc. Many of the children, given a free choice, chose eggy bread and beans over bacon, cheese sandwiches over ham, skipped the meatballs and had tomato sauce and cheese with the pasta. None are vegetarian, but I think if the meat options hadn't been offered, they wouldn't have been missed. The kids would just choose from the options that were offered, and not bat an eyelid.

I couldnt get worked up about this. Worse come to worse mine would happily eat pasta or chips for a week