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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Husband & woman from work & therapist

79 replies

ThatLilacWriter · 23/09/2025 20:59

name change! I checked my husbands phone for the first time in 12 years. Not saying that like it’s an achievement, just know it’s not ideal and giving context. It was only a quick scan and I found he had a message from a woman from work that was the link and email to a couples therapist.

I showed him straight away and asked for an explanation, and I cannot tell if I’m being paranoid or if this is an odd response.

i said, why has she sent you that and he went on a long winded story about how she’s lost a lot of weight and on a recent work trip was raving about this therapist who helped her with her relationship (but yet she is now single?). I said okay so you were talking about our relationship to someone from work (which I was uncomfortable with but not angry) and he denied and said not at all, that he never discussed us at all, but that she just said apparently this therapist was really good and sent it to him.

writing this down it doesn’t seem such a biggie but I just feel the story doesn’t add up! He even said he’d told her I don’t need a therapist but she sent him a couples therapist anyway. He doesn’t know her well, she’s very attractive and recently single. Am I being crazy?

OP posts:
NotToday1l · 27/09/2025 21:40

ThatLilacWriter · 27/09/2025 16:08

also I hadn’t thought that it could be her way of basically rejecting him, I’d immediately felt anger towards her - like she was meddling, had bad motives. clearly I have some internalised misogyny going on that I need to work on!

also I hadn’t thought that it could be her way of basically rejecting him

This is a thought I had as-well, if she was interested why would she be recommending a therapist to fix his current relationship

MasterBeth · 27/09/2025 21:42

Springadorable · 23/09/2025 21:07

I can't think of a good reason that someone he doesn't really know would randomly send a colleague information on a couple's therapist without prompting.

You have no imagination, then.

Springadorable · 27/09/2025 21:44

MasterBeth · 27/09/2025 21:42

You have no imagination, then.

Ok, give me ten plausible reasons. Go.

moderate · 28/09/2025 11:39

Springadorable · 27/09/2025 21:44

Ok, give me ten plausible reasons. Go.

A single plausible reason will suffice just fine.

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