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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I feel so demoralised

90 replies

Middleageddreameresawsss · 22/09/2025 09:09

Ive just read that Nigel Frarage will send back all immigrants and abolish the settled status. We wont be able to stay in the UK unless we earn a high salary and instead be on some sort of renewable status visa.
I was born in the Netherlands. Came to the UK aged 1 year. Mum is Irish. Went to school here, then have been working in the nhs for 30 years. I have settled status but I also have long term cancer so I am a drain on the nhs.
Ill be 59 when he gets into power. I dont know how Ill manage. Im carer for my mum who has dementia and isnt going anywhere soon.

OP posts:
Bumdrops · 22/09/2025 10:49

Oh my goodness, he’s like a pantomime dame, whipping things up with catchphrases and cliches

it’s not going to happen
he’s just riding the wave of frustration about the small boats

Middleageddreameresawsss · 22/09/2025 10:50

Thanks. Ill look at British Citizenship. Ive not done it so far in past 6 years as constant chemo has wrecked my brain to recall dates etc.
I think Im just anxious. Ive been deemed non eligible for a cancer drug trial, having to get a new plan, my mum has been diagnosed with dementia and isnt great and Nigel Farage tipped me over the edge today.

OP posts:
SkipAd · 22/09/2025 10:55

Please don’t spend any precious time worrying about this.
I can assure you that right now empty vessels are making the most noise.
Many, many British people do not agree with Farage. The next election is four years away, some people will vote reform then, but many of us will NOT.

EasternStandard · 22/09/2025 10:56

I admit I don’t know the process but that is a long time, isn’t there a way to get citizenship here?

Kavita12 · 22/09/2025 11:23

It's very concerning. There must be like 5+ million people with ILR in the UK and also outside of UK (there are many rich businessmen with IRL who studied here as kids/teenagers and then left, have properties here and visit once a year, planning now to send kids here to unis). Most people with permanent residence have been here for 10+ years, have families and kids who are British. I can imagine that most have worked, esp. in the NHS. Many millions are Europeans with Settles Status - result of Brexit. He would have to abolish Settles Status first, I imagine?
To those who ask, why they never got British passport - some countries don't allow dual citizenship. For some people, the cost is too high. And then, ILR allows flexibility to millions in the global world, also in business.

GoodTimesNoodleSalad · 22/09/2025 11:30

Mass immigration has been disastrous for the UK. A Reform government is a foregone conclusion now, and anyone who thinks otherwise really has their head in the sand.

MrsSkylerWhite · 22/09/2025 11:34

GoodTimesNoodleSalad · 22/09/2025 11:30

Mass immigration has been disastrous for the UK. A Reform government is a foregone conclusion now, and anyone who thinks otherwise really has their head in the sand.

No, it really isn’t.
it remains to be seen if Reform can hold itself together for nearly 4 years.

LeonMccogh · 22/09/2025 11:36

He can safely say whatever he likes because he’ll never have the chance to implement it. 😂

PandoraSocks · 22/09/2025 11:40

LeonMccogh · 22/09/2025 11:36

He can safely say whatever he likes because he’ll never have the chance to implement it. 😂

I really hope you are right, but the polls aren't encouraging right now.

This latest policy is repugnant and designed to appeal to the xenophobes. It would affect some of my family and makes me feel sick.

GoodTimesNoodleSalad · 22/09/2025 11:42

MrsSkylerWhite · 22/09/2025 11:34

No, it really isn’t.
it remains to be seen if Reform can hold itself together for nearly 4 years.

In your opinion - it hasn’t. In mine, it has been a catastrophe. My opinion is just as valid as yours.

Unfortunately Reform may not have to wait that long.

PandoraSocks · 22/09/2025 11:44

MrsSkylerWhite · 22/09/2025 11:34

No, it really isn’t.
it remains to be seen if Reform can hold itself together for nearly 4 years.

Plus I truly think if Reform are a real danger by 2029, the majority of the electorate who don't support Reform will vote tactically to keep Farage from no. 10.

shhblackbag · 22/09/2025 11:48

To those who ask, why they never got British passport - some countries don't allow dual citizenship. For some people, the cost is too high. And then, ILR allows flexibility to millions in the global world, also in business.

Yes, this. I left years ago, but this is why I didn't apply for citizenship when living there. Too expensive to apply for/complete. I also couldn't hold dual citizenship at the time.

padsi1975 · 22/09/2025 11:52

If your Mum is Irish you can get an Irish passport and then you're covered under the common travel area. You wouldn't need citizenship.

SirHumphreyRocks · 22/09/2025 11:57

As somebody who rightly predicted Trump both times when everyone said "never", I am not as certain as some that Reform won't pull off an election victory (although doing my very best to ensure he doesn't). That said, he can say what he likes right now, but the fact is that he couldn't pull any of it off. Reform are big on words, but can't deliver it anyway. Take a look at what they were going to do for the councils they have taken - it's mostly a scandal hit shambles as one after another resigns for one reason or another, and a total inability to actually deliver the "savings" they claimed could be made because they couldn't be made. In a way, I think that having a few years to the next general election may be a good thing because it will give enough time for the idiots who beieve them to see their broken "promises".

pointythings · 22/09/2025 12:25

OfKitten · 22/09/2025 09:59

Agree with PP he will say anything, but any reason you don't want to become a UK citizen?

The Dutch government doesn't accept dual nationality. Though if this is brought in, there is provision for an exception in the law. Right now, if I naturalised, I lose my Dutch citizenship. And that price is too high.

GoodLaudanum · 22/09/2025 12:28

Middleageddreameresawsss · 22/09/2025 09:09

Ive just read that Nigel Frarage will send back all immigrants and abolish the settled status. We wont be able to stay in the UK unless we earn a high salary and instead be on some sort of renewable status visa.
I was born in the Netherlands. Came to the UK aged 1 year. Mum is Irish. Went to school here, then have been working in the nhs for 30 years. I have settled status but I also have long term cancer so I am a drain on the nhs.
Ill be 59 when he gets into power. I dont know how Ill manage. Im carer for my mum who has dementia and isnt going anywhere soon.

Don't worry he won't actually get in.

Everyone can see he's a complete muppet.
He even looks like Kermit (no offence to Kermit who is actually a really sound geezer)

StewkeyBlue · 22/09/2025 12:29

GoodTimesNoodleSalad · 22/09/2025 11:30

Mass immigration has been disastrous for the UK. A Reform government is a foregone conclusion now, and anyone who thinks otherwise really has their head in the sand.

Can you please explain why immigration has been a disaster for the UK?

GoodTimesNoodleSalad · 22/09/2025 12:30

SirHumphreyRocks · 22/09/2025 11:57

As somebody who rightly predicted Trump both times when everyone said "never", I am not as certain as some that Reform won't pull off an election victory (although doing my very best to ensure he doesn't). That said, he can say what he likes right now, but the fact is that he couldn't pull any of it off. Reform are big on words, but can't deliver it anyway. Take a look at what they were going to do for the councils they have taken - it's mostly a scandal hit shambles as one after another resigns for one reason or another, and a total inability to actually deliver the "savings" they claimed could be made because they couldn't be made. In a way, I think that having a few years to the next general election may be a good thing because it will give enough time for the idiots who beieve them to see their broken "promises".

I don’t know if anyone voting for them genuinely thinks they’ll be better, or more effective. However, they’re the untried option now both other parties have failed. It’s a sign of how desperate people are to get this issue under control that they’re willing to take the chance. Which other party is willing to take serious, drastic action?

GoodTimesNoodleSalad · 22/09/2025 12:32

StewkeyBlue · 22/09/2025 12:29

Can you please explain why immigration has been a disaster for the UK?

Is this a disingenuous question, or are you actually interested in an answer?

SirHumphreyRocks · 22/09/2025 12:33

GoodTimesNoodleSalad · 22/09/2025 12:30

I don’t know if anyone voting for them genuinely thinks they’ll be better, or more effective. However, they’re the untried option now both other parties have failed. It’s a sign of how desperate people are to get this issue under control that they’re willing to take the chance. Which other party is willing to take serious, drastic action?

It’s a sign of how desperate people are to get this issue under control that they’re willing to take the chance.

Its actually a sign that people have been fed a diet of "it's all their fault things are tough for you". Like all crap diets, it'll be crap in and crap out. People are being fed lies and misinformation.

KateMiskin · 22/09/2025 12:33

StewkeyBlue · 22/09/2025 12:29

Can you please explain why immigration has been a disaster for the UK?

We have about 9999 other threads on that already!

StewkeyBlue · 22/09/2025 12:35

Middleageddreameresawsss · 22/09/2025 09:52

Thanks. I think he will get voted in. Im not sure ill be alive when it happens anyway. There is no recovery from the type of cancer I have but its expensive to treat and ecen tho Ive paid full NI, tax etc Im an immigrant that he and his followers want out.

OP I am truly sorry that you are facing all this, and it is not surprising that Farage's rhetoric is so demoralising and distressing to you. It's the sentiment and the hostility that is so upsetting, whether or not there is any legal or practical basis an an attempt to deport millions of people like yourself. I mean really - can you imagine?

You are not a drain - and thank you for your contribution as a long term employee of the NHS.

FinallyHere · 22/09/2025 12:38

I’m embarrassed that this is happening in my adopted country and very sorry for your situation.

user1471483687 · 22/09/2025 12:38

Apply for an Irish passport, using your mums birth certificate, under the common travel area rules, Irish citizens are allowed to live and work in the UK with no restrictions (and vice versa).

StewkeyBlue · 22/09/2025 12:39

KateMiskin · 22/09/2025 12:33

We have about 9999 other threads on that already!

Doesn't men I accept or understand this post without explanation.

Either the pp can succinctly explain it or she can't.

Read the update from the OP. She has settled status and has worked for the NHS for 30 years. And now has incurable cancer and fears Farage will see her as a burden and deport her if he gets in.

I really need to understand why her immigration has been a problem, let alone a disaster.

And how PP who support Farage see this playing out for individuals like the OP?

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