Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

School receptionist

63 replies

Twinmum345 · 15/09/2025 09:22

i just lost it with the school receptionist. Not my finest moment but I have had 3 years now of her being consistently rude (not just to me but to everyone) and I snapped. I am always extremely polite and calm with her, always really nice, even got her a Christmas gift with the other teachers, and she has been nothing but rude everytime we have ever spoken. The school also acknowledges this as they do get regular complaints about her. Anyway,

my twins (7 years old) are off school today as we all have a really bad virus. Temps had been 39+ sometimes reaching 40 (I’m a nurse also). They were off Thursday and Friday however I spoke to a different teacher last week. Called in today as they are still unwell although improving, and still have a fever and immediately the receptionist demands documentation to prove they are unwell. Not asks, demands. I said I havnt taken them to the GP but have spoke to 111. Apparently this isn’t good enough and I must produce a doctors note and she also questioned why i am not giving them antibiotics.

Obviously I told her the “documentation” isn’t a requirement and they don’t have antibiotics because it’s a viral infection. I was really polite but she kept being really rude and demanding that I must provide it.

i am normally really good at holding it together but I also have the virus, my temp is 39.8, I was holding a screaming baby and I have not slept and she was talking to me like I was a complete idiot.

does anyone else have a nightmare receptionist?

also to add: she said any absence over 3 days requires “documentation”.. this has never been the case and she had nothing to say when I pointed out that not once has she ever asked me for this

OP posts:
Tagyoureit · 15/09/2025 09:45

Ignore her!!

Concentrate on getting yourself and the kids better.

I'd be making an official complaint about her too!!

Original poster
Twinmum345 · 15/09/2025 09:54

Tagyoureit · 15/09/2025 09:45

Ignore her!!

Concentrate on getting yourself and the kids better.

I'd be making an official complaint about her too!!

I actually feel really annoyed about it!

thank you! X

I have complained before but the school don’t really do anything! Feels almost pointless xxx

OP posts:
Breadpool · 15/09/2025 09:58

I'd have asked for a post it note and a pent. Scribbled on it "the children are ill" sign it "from a nurse" and pass it back.

Swiftie1878 · 15/09/2025 10:02

Just ignore her, and let the head know that you are ignoring her and focusing on getting your family back on its feet.

Original poster
Twinmum345 · 15/09/2025 10:02

Breadpool · 15/09/2025 09:58

I'd have asked for a post it note and a pent. Scribbled on it "the children are ill" sign it "from a nurse" and pass it back.

That would have been brilliant 🤣 it was over the phone but maybe I will email that.

OP posts:
InterestedDad37 · 15/09/2025 10:03

Perhaps she knows all the Head's dark secrets, and so they can't get rid of her 🙂

NeverDropYourMooncup · 15/09/2025 10:06

She's been instructed to do this. Take your issues up with the governors if you want the school to change their attendance policy and procedures.

takealettermsjones · 15/09/2025 10:06

Sorry you're all ill! Hope you get better soon.

Just stay calm, stick to your guns, and end the call when she's being weird/rude. Give yourself a script: "ok, so I've called you as per policy, I'm now ending the call. You can email me if there's anything else" or "I won't be doing that as I explained, please put any further requests in writing, bye now" etc. Treat her like a whingy toddler 🤣

takealettermsjones · 15/09/2025 10:08

NeverDropYourMooncup · 15/09/2025 10:06

She's been instructed to do this. Take your issues up with the governors if you want the school to change their attendance policy and procedures.

The OP doesn't have to go to the governors (except perhaps to complain) - the receptionist is the point of contact. It's completely reasonable to say no I don't have documentation because it's a virus and no I won't be getting any.

JMSA · 15/09/2025 10:08

What a cow!
Hope you and yours are feeling better soon 💐

RamblingFar · 15/09/2025 10:11

YANBU to be annoyed. If they are ill, they are ill, and not every viral illness needs to see a doctor.

However, she is probably demanding documentation because she has been told she has to. Whether that is by the SMT or academy trust to try and prove to Ofsted they are doing their best on absence, she may not get the choice to ask.

NoSoapJustUseShowerGel · 15/09/2025 10:16

Ignore it and concentrate on getting you all better.
Some people are just jobsworths. One of the receptionists at my kids’ primary school used to treat me like dirt on the bottom of her shoe. We were a non-problematic family- always polite and respectful, well-behaved kids who were rarely absent, never late, we never made complaints etc etc. I wasn’t the only one she treated like this, either.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 15/09/2025 10:18

takealettermsjones · 15/09/2025 10:08

The OP doesn't have to go to the governors (except perhaps to complain) - the receptionist is the point of contact. It's completely reasonable to say no I don't have documentation because it's a virus and no I won't be getting any.

Show quote history

What do you expect her to do about it? She's been told that everybody must provide evidence, so she has to do as she is instructed and repeat that to parents.

Every unauthorised absence (which if the attendance policy now requires evidence is what it will be recorded as) is recorded and shared live with DfE and the local authority in accordance with Statutory Guidance. Shouting at her down the phone doesn't cannot prevent unauthorised absences - which as the policy has apparently changed to require evidence of illness, these will be - going on record permanently.

Confusdworriedmum · 15/09/2025 10:23

NeverDropYourMooncup · 15/09/2025 10:06

She's been instructed to do this. Take your issues up with the governors if you want the school to change their attendance policy and procedures.

OP said this has never been the case before.
If it is a new policy there is still no reason for the receptionist to be so rude. No doctor is going to issue a sick note for a 7; year old.

CrispieCake · 15/09/2025 10:24

Tell her she's welcome to come to your house where the kids will cough on her as "proof".

Pippa12 · 15/09/2025 10:25

NeverDropYourMooncup · 15/09/2025 10:06

She's been instructed to do this. Take your issues up with the governors if you want the school to change their attendance policy and procedures.

She not been instructed to be a complete cock tho has she?

spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 10:28

YANBU. Schools often seem to ignore the guidance on illness reporting from DfE, which is in normal circumstances to not insist on paperwork from a GP or other medical professional.

Original poster
Twinmum345 · 15/09/2025 10:36

NeverDropYourMooncup · 15/09/2025 10:06

She's been instructed to do this. Take your issues up with the governors if you want the school to change their attendance policy and procedures.

It’s not a requirement though, It’s not something parents are obligated to provide and it was more so about how she spoke to me. Had she simply said “sorry to hear the twins are unwell mum, but I do have to ask, do you have bla bla bla” type of thing I would have simply said no and that would be it but to be so outright rude and demand that I must provide it and to have a go at me for not giving them antibiotics they don’t need is just out of line. She’s just an idiot and that’s all there is to it

OP posts:
Original poster
Twinmum345 · 15/09/2025 10:36

Pippa12 · 15/09/2025 10:25

She not been instructed to be a complete cock tho has she?

Show quote history

Exactly 🤣 my issue was how she spoke to me

OP posts:
Original poster
Twinmum345 · 15/09/2025 10:37

CrispieCake · 15/09/2025 10:24

Tell her she's welcome to come to your house where the kids will cough on her as "proof".

This made me laugh 🤣🤣

OP posts:
Original poster
Twinmum345 · 15/09/2025 10:38

NeverDropYourMooncup · 15/09/2025 10:18

What do you expect her to do about it? She's been told that everybody must provide evidence, so she has to do as she is instructed and repeat that to parents.

Every unauthorised absence (which if the attendance policy now requires evidence is what it will be recorded as) is recorded and shared live with DfE and the local authority in accordance with Statutory Guidance. Shouting at her down the phone doesn't cannot prevent unauthorised absences - which as the policy has apparently changed to require evidence of illness, these will be - going on record permanently.

Show quote history

Where did I say I shouted?

OP posts:
SirBasil · 15/09/2025 10:38

hope you and the DCs all feel better soon.

I just used to broken record with people like that, and make sure i followed the actual regulations carefully.

Email the head again. Ask for them to re-distribute the rules and make sure receptionist knows them.

takealettermsjones · 15/09/2025 10:39

NeverDropYourMooncup · 15/09/2025 10:18

What do you expect her to do about it? She's been told that everybody must provide evidence, so she has to do as she is instructed and repeat that to parents.

Every unauthorised absence (which if the attendance policy now requires evidence is what it will be recorded as) is recorded and shared live with DfE and the local authority in accordance with Statutory Guidance. Shouting at her down the phone doesn't cannot prevent unauthorised absences - which as the policy has apparently changed to require evidence of illness, these will be - going on record permanently.

Show quote history

If it is policy (which OP says it isn't) then fine, she's done her job, she's repeated it to the parent. The parent has then said no. It's not the receptionist's job to be rude about it. And I've never suggested shouting at her down the phone.

SirBasil · 15/09/2025 10:40

What do you expect her to do about it? She's been told that everybody must provide evidence, so she has to do as she is instructed and repeat that to parents.

but that isn't what she was doing? all the bollocks about antibiotics. She's not a GP, antibiotic overuse is a huge problem. She needs to wind her neck in and not harrangue the parents. All she needs to do is make a note "no note provided" or whatever and pass it up the chain for OP to deal with when she gets an official letter from the school about absences.

She needs to be reined in because it is not her job and she is overreaching.

LlamaNoDrama · 15/09/2025 10:41

Schools do not need a doctors note unless they doubt the veracity of the illness and ones that demand it without good cause are frankly being dicks. Good for you op. I had my fill of the school receptionist at my dcs school who was also always unnecessarily rude, perhaps she's now your one!