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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Angry my manager has taken away WFH perk?

233 replies

ZaHaK · 15/09/2025 01:09

Am I unreasonable to be angry that my manager has taken away my wfh perk whilst I’m on maternity?

I have put in a proposed flexible work plan.

I used to do Tuesday - Thursday on site and Friday morning at home.

I requested to do less hours so I can drop the kids off to school and pick them up and keep my wfh Friday morning hours.

He’s rejected it and basically cornered me into just doing Tuesday- Thursday on site but I don’t want to reduce my hours too much so I’ve had to add an hour in the morning which means rushing my kids to breakfast club and nursery.

I am annoyed because on my last maternity 6 years ago, I applied for another job in another department which guaranteed wfh and my manager promised me more flexibility and wfh when I able to to keep me in his team.

But I feel like he’s used this maternity as an excuse to take it away from me. It’s not in my contract, it was an agreement between me and him.

What would you do? I feel like emailing him to say I am disappointed in him. Not many of our team like him but I used to rate him quite highly on the surveys etc because he always let me be. But I am really disappointed. I should have gone to the other team.

OP posts:
Thelnebriati · 15/09/2025 11:14

spoonbillstretford is right, talk to ACAS. Its not like the arrangement was going on for a couple of months. Be clear about the time line, write it out before you phone them.

wineandagoodbook · 15/09/2025 11:15

Parker231 · 15/09/2025 07:56

Appeal - on what grounds?

On the grounds that she has already been doing it and it works - i'm not saying she would get it, but if the first response is no I would appeal the decision and they would need to have a good reason why she couldn't

spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 11:15

UninterestedBeing12 · 15/09/2025 01:51

Yes really. Perhaps someone else has complained. You're not the only employee to have a baby and you won't be the last employee to have a baby.

If they do it for you, they have to do it for everyone, perhaps somebody has complained. They can either give everyone arrangements like you or they can take your arrangement away.

Tough titty. That is the manager's and other members of staff's problem and not the OP's to worry about.

rwalker · 15/09/2025 11:17

So you do 2 1/2 days 2 on site and 1/2 day wfh
you’ve asked to reduce your hours and they’ve offered to drop the 1/2 day Fri

it’s what works for the company not particularly what you want

SirHumphreyRocks · 15/09/2025 11:17

spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 11:11

Verbally agreed changes in working pattern, and custom and practice can become part of your employment contract.

I'd email to say the current system you agreed back in 2020 has been working very well for you for five years now and you don't agree with the proposed changes to your employment contract.

This has been said multiple times on the thread... whether or not the previously agreed term has become contractual is entirely irrelevant. The OP has asked the employer to change their contract. The employer is not obliged to make any changes, so they can propose their own too. OP may accept them or not - employer can refuse to make any changes. And then employer could impose a contractual change anyway IF they think the wfh agreement might be contractual.

ZaHaK · 15/09/2025 11:18

BuckChuckets · 15/09/2025 11:14

He's not self-employed if he "has to go into the office" at specific times. If he thinks he is, he needs to remind himself how HMRC class self-employment, because he could be in trouble.

He works for the HMRC. He’s a contractor for them…

OP posts:
AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 15/09/2025 11:19

ZaHaK · 15/09/2025 01:25

But the perk would have still been there if it wasn’t for my maternity. I feel like I’m being punished for having a baby.

one kid will be in breakfast club, the other in nursery

You’ve asked to change your contractual hours. It’s not because of the maternity. It would have stayed the same had you been returning on the same terms.

SirHumphreyRocks · 15/09/2025 11:19

spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 11:15

Tough titty. That is the manager's and other members of staff's problem and not the OP's to worry about.

Tough titty on the OP - she asked for the contractual change. It is the employees responsibility to understand the implications of their actions before taking them.

spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 11:22

SirHumphreyRocks · 15/09/2025 11:19

Tough titty on the OP - she asked for the contractual change. It is the employees responsibility to understand the implications of their actions before taking them.

It isn't. Stop giving incorrect legal advice!

spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 11:28

Just to clarify, yes the employer can reject a further claim to reduce hours.

She may come back and work on the same basis as she had for five years and went on Mat leave though, with WFH included, and this has become part of her contract even though there was a verbal change.

UninterestedBeing12 · 15/09/2025 11:30

spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 11:15

Tough titty. That is the manager's and other members of staff's problem and not the OP's to worry about.

I think she'll find it is very much her problem.

She shouldn't listen to uninformed posters who use puerile expressions such as tough titty without any real thought or reasoning behind it.

PollyBell · 15/09/2025 11:31

SirHumphreyRocks · 15/09/2025 11:19

Tough titty on the OP - she asked for the contractual change. It is the employees responsibility to understand the implications of their actions before taking them.

Can that be used on court?

pinkdelight · 15/09/2025 11:31

She has now said she's content with the outcome though and seeing the positives - extra time with DC - so all's well that ends well eh.

Lotsnlotsoflove · 15/09/2025 11:32

It doesn't matter if it wasn't in writing. The contract is established by the working pattern, not what is written down - that's employment law. Your employer is not allowed to put something in your contract and then change the terms in practice, changing them in practice and establishing that over a number of years is a change of contract. Get some advice from ACAS, because this could well count as pregnancy-related discrimination.

SirHumphreyRocks · 15/09/2025 11:32

spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 11:22

It isn't. Stop giving incorrect legal advice!

It is YOU who is giving incorrecty legal advice - and actually none of this is legal advice (thank God, because lots of it is wrong) - this is an anonymous social forum. No legal advice permitted.

spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 11:33

UninterestedBeing12 · 15/09/2025 11:30

I think she'll find it is very much her problem.

She shouldn't listen to uninformed posters who use puerile expressions such as tough titty without any real thought or reasoning behind it.

I'm a solicitor of over 20 years standing and have dealt with numerous employment issues in the last five years. I know the law and good practice. What are your qualifications to give an expert opinion on this thread, out of interest?

SirHumphreyRocks · 15/09/2025 11:35

spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 11:33

I'm a solicitor of over 20 years standing and have dealt with numerous employment issues in the last five years. I know the law and good practice. What are your qualifications to give an expert opinion on this thread, out of interest?

Edited

Anyone can claim anything, but I seriously hope that you are not giving legal advice if this is the quality that can be expected.

ZaHaK · 15/09/2025 11:35

Lotsnlotsoflove · 15/09/2025 11:32

It doesn't matter if it wasn't in writing. The contract is established by the working pattern, not what is written down - that's employment law. Your employer is not allowed to put something in your contract and then change the terms in practice, changing them in practice and establishing that over a number of years is a change of contract. Get some advice from ACAS, because this could well count as pregnancy-related discrimination.

What if he’s given a valid reason in the eyes of HR? He’s given a reason that a recent inspection requires more on site ( I’ve tried to argue this) but in the end, HR will side with him as he’s arguing it’s business needs - even though I know full well they’ve reduced headcount so I’ve gone from checking two full time employees work to one person who also works part time now since I’ve gone on maternity. But he’s not taking that into consideration.

My manager hates people WFH even though he does it himself. He likes to control his numerous team and throw his weight around. He even gets his other team to write down what time they started lunch and what time they finished. He isn’t a respected or liked manager.

OP posts:
spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 11:38

SirHumphreyRocks · 15/09/2025 11:35

Anyone can claim anything, but I seriously hope that you are not giving legal advice if this is the quality that can be expected.

I'll assume then that you don't have any relevant qualifications or experience.

OP @ZaHaK These things are often better dealt with on specialist boards rather than AIBU, such as Work or Legal Matters. Perhaps have the thread moved.

ZaHaK · 15/09/2025 11:39

spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 11:38

I'll assume then that you don't have any relevant qualifications or experience.

OP @ZaHaK These things are often better dealt with on specialist boards rather than AIBU, such as Work or Legal Matters. Perhaps have the thread moved.

I actually have no idea what people are talking about above.

OP posts:
Createausername1970 · 15/09/2025 11:40

ZaHaK · 15/09/2025 01:25

But the perk would have still been there if it wasn’t for my maternity. I feel like I’m being punished for having a baby.

one kid will be in breakfast club, the other in nursery

Do you know that for sure?

If you are the only person who is permitted to WFH, and others had it rejected, then it's possible others have objected. As it's a perk and not in your contract it was probably going to disappear at some point.

spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 11:42

Here you are, @ZaHaK

Work

Legal Matters

Rosscameasdoody · 15/09/2025 11:49

SirHumphreyRocks · 15/09/2025 11:32

It is YOU who is giving incorrecty legal advice - and actually none of this is legal advice (thank God, because lots of it is wrong) - this is an anonymous social forum. No legal advice permitted.

This. I gave advice based on twenty years experience in the employment advisory field. As far as I can see OP is the one who instigated the change by asking for a reduction in hours. The manager will have reviewed the request while considering the operational needs of the business and made the decision based on that. Stopping the working from home makes perfect sense - if OP is needed in the office from Tuesday through to Thursday then that’s clearly where he’s put the emphasis because she’s working less hours so more of them need to be office based. Makes sense to me.

OP seems to think they have to accommodate her child care needs and this is not the case. They can’t accommodate the hours she wanted and have suggested an alternative. If the manager can show that this is necessary because of business needs I can’t see much alternative to either OP accepting it or withdrawing the request for reduced hours and carrying on as she was.

SirHumphreyRocks · 15/09/2025 11:52

spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 11:38

I'll assume then that you don't have any relevant qualifications or experience.

OP @ZaHaK These things are often better dealt with on specialist boards rather than AIBU, such as Work or Legal Matters. Perhaps have the thread moved.

You would assume massively wrong then, so that is two things you are incorrect about.

Contracts can be changed by force - whether it constitutes unfair dismissal or discrimination is for a court to decide, but unless the change is significant it is unlikely, and even a signbificant change may be accepted by a court. It is called "fire and rehire" and it is something that anyone with substantail employment law experience knows about. And lots of lay people know too since it has been done to many people in recent years and attraced much news attention.

The OP submitted a flexible working request, which is a request to vary their contract. At that point the employer can negotiate any changes to terms they wish. The employee can accept those changes (called compromising) or they can refuse in which case they continue under their existing contract.

spoonbillstretford · 15/09/2025 11:52

Rosscameasdoody · 15/09/2025 11:49

This. I gave advice based on twenty years experience in the employment advisory field. As far as I can see OP is the one who instigated the change by asking for a reduction in hours. The manager will have reviewed the request while considering the operational needs of the business and made the decision based on that. Stopping the working from home makes perfect sense - if OP is needed in the office from Tuesday through to Thursday then that’s clearly where he’s put the emphasis because she’s working less hours so more of them need to be office based. Makes sense to me.

OP seems to think they have to accommodate her child care needs and this is not the case. They can’t accommodate the hours she wanted and have suggested an alternative. If the manager can show that this is necessary because of business needs I can’t see much alternative to either OP accepting it or withdrawing the request for reduced hours and carrying on as she was.

Edited

That's what I said about fourteen posts ago.