AIBU to stop next doors sick cat coming into my garden?

[GardenCatHorror]

Neighbours (retired couple in their 80s) have a cat and a dog. Our gardens have quite tall fences and there has been a hole in a low fence panel for quite a few years that their cat has used to come between our two gardens. We are both mid terrace houses and our gardens are functional but not big.

Their cat poos in our garden all the time. It was always in this same dirt spot under a tree, so I just cleaned it up and didn't make a fuss about it because I understand that's kind of what cats do. I would rather the cat wasn't in our garden as I have young kids who I have to keep away from the part of the garden it was using as a toilet, but I have never once said anything to the neighbours complaining. Our garden is functional but not fancy. We usually get along well enough- they look after our houseplants while we go away, take in parcels. I have given them a sign in to our netflix etc.

We have been away for two weeks, and then there was bad weather, so yesterday was the first day we were outside hoping to enjoy our garden in close to a month. Their cat has clearly gotten very sick. There was about twenty piles of cat poo on our lawn, many appear to be bad diarrhea, we couldn't let our kids onto the lawn at all to play and spent nearly an hour cleaning everything from this cat/ trying to scoop up the chunks and cut away all the dirty grass, along with some more over by the tree and a bit on the gravel. The grass has grown a little long lately (top of an ankle boot height) so it was really hard to clean/ see. It was absolutely disgusting and really stunk. I blocked off the hole in the fence because I couldn't cope with having to clean a mess like that again.

I received a text from the neighbours today that their cat is very old and needs to be able to come into our garden and they didn't want to fall out over this, so they were letting us know they had opened up the hole into our garden again. I rang them to explain about the liquid poo on our grass and said I wasn't comfortable with the cat coming over anymore. Neighbour then told me the cat is only an outside cat now and fairly feral, and needs to be able to leave her garden when her dog goes outside or the dog will hurt her. Apparently the cat being able to come into our garden and just go into theirs to get food when the dog is shut away has been the cats living situation for a while. Noone ever asked us! Cat is too old to climb fences apparently.

I explained my concern with the poo I couldn't clean up around my young kids and another relative who is undergoing chemo. I never said anything nasty, I never called her a name, I never made a threat. I was just trying to be firm. I said I needed to talk to my husband about it after hearing what she'd been saying about her cat being unsafe in her garden and about this sickness likely being permanent for the rest of the cats life due to old age/ kidney problems. But then she's been sending some really hurtful text messages accusations saying I am clearly having 'Karen' moments, that I should 'stop upsetting two pensioners with health problems', that I should 'let it go' 'that I have mental issues going on if I'm upset about their cat (she knows my parent has terminal cancer so I'm going through an emotionally draining time), that I better not hurt their cat (I have never hurt their cat!).

Honestly it's been so bad this afternoon I've just blocked them on my phone. Fence hole is currently unblocked, no sign of their cat before it got dark. I am both so upset I just want to block the fence up permanently and be done with them, but don't want to leave the cat in a dangerous position. Do I get my husband to text? Do I just ignore them and carry on cleaning up after the damn cat? Do I sprinkle pepper on our lawn?

They have been kind neighbours in the past so i would probably have just put up with it once she told me about the dog being unsafe around the cat, but then these nasty texts started. AIBU if I block up the fence and blow up neighbourly relations for good?

They are being highly, highly unreasonable. Do they rent or own? What they are doing is crossing into harassment. Of course their cat shouldn't be allowed to shit all over your garden with young kids about and no they shouldn't expect it.

Is it your fence or theirs? If yours then I'd have it mended properly on your side if theirs then I'd erect fencing in front of it on your property so you're blocking it off but on your side only. Then anything they do to reopen that is damage to property.

Jesus, they sound unhinged. Their cat is not your problem, there's no way I'd have put up with a neighbours cat regularly shitting in our garden even before it was ill, I'd have covered up the hole long ago. Disgusting.

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The cat needs to go to a vet, block your fence up, I’d make some enquiries to report animal neglect.

Take the dcat to a vet. Say you found it poorly in your garden. Let them contact the owner and insist it gets treatment... They sound bloody cruel. Locking it out because it's old and sick.

I have a cat and they’re being incredibly unreasonable
mine goes next door because he likes their furniture
he doesn’t toilet outside, I’ve said in the (v v v rare event) he does to please knock and I will come and clear up
they don’t mind at all and even replaced a water feature when it broke as they loved seeing my stupid previous cat paddling in it

Their cat, their problem. They shouldn't have let the situation with the cat and dog develop, they could have made other arrangements for the cat to get to safety away from the dog. They should take the poor animal to a vet, it's cruel and illegal to not seek veterinary advice. I'm actually stunned that their belief is that you should allow your garden to be badly soiled by their cat and just put up with it! It's their problem.

I would be blocking the gap up on my side so that they can't unblock it, and blocking their number so they can't keep sending you near-abusive messages about it.

Block fence, don't engage further. The sound awful. Nice if they get their way, bullying otherwise.

Agree with past posters. Drop off at a vet or contact rspca. This is very unfair on the cat, let alone you!

Our cat tends to come in the use the litter tray - but if our neighbours told me he was toileting in their garden I would be mortified and through with the poo bags to clean it up myself. Our previous cat toileted outside 99% of the time, in a designated spot at the back of our garden, and she buried her poo. (The 1% of the time if the weather was too filthy even for her, she used the litter tray.)

This poor cat sounds very unwell and like it needs to go to the vet, not be roaming around outside all the time.

Their cat needs a vet. Excessive diarrhea isnt normal. Kidney problems in cats kill them. Quickly.

Theyre very very very U. If they know their cat is sick and ignoring it, if they know their dog would hurt their cat so just hope the cat will get scared enough to run into your garden.

That's before we get to how dare they unblock your fence and try and emotionally manipulate you into tolerating the consequences of their neglect.

Id tell them their cats safety is their issue, they cant put your children and immu-compromised relatives at risk of diseases because they dont want to treat their animals toilet issue.

I would nail a board across the hole. Id also soak some teabags in teatree oil or eucalyptus oil and put them near the hole and the scruffy tree. Chilly flakes near the tree and hole will help. Cats dont like citrus either.

Honestly as someone with 2 cats, and a house rabbit. YANBU this is a them problem

What horrible people. Vile to their cat and their neighbours.

That poor, sick, neglected animal needs to see a vet and to find a new home where it’s safe from the dog.

OP, you owe these nasty wretches nothing. They have treated you appallingly.

I’d remind them that toddlers playing in vomit and diarrhoea can become unwell and they are being unhelpful sending the cat over. The dog just needs let out separately. Presumably they don’t walk it? Sigh.

id ask them is they can get the cat to a vet or if they need a lift. Poor cat. If the vet can sort it problem solved. If it gets put down problem solved.

I wouldn’t care how old they are or how unwell the cat is. If they actually think it’s reasonable to expect their cat to be allowed to shit all over a neighbour’s garden like that, they’re dreadful people, and I’d have no problem telling them that to their face. No way would I be so accommodating and nice, and I’d make sure the cat had absolutely no access to my property going forward.

I love my cats too, but that’s outrageous behaviour.

You’re so much nicer than me. After cleaning up after their animal the last thing I’d want to do is offer them a lift to the vet!

That poor cat needs a trip to the vet and they’re neglecting it by leaving it outside in this state. Definitely get it to the vet if you can. It deserves kindness and dignity it won’t be getting from your vile neighbours.

I have 2 cats and would be horrified if they were fouling a neighbour’s garden like this.
As PP have said, block up the hole in the fence permanently. You said you have blocked their phone number. I hope you have also changed your Netflix sign in.
They have brought this on themselves with their unreasonable behaviour.

You absolutely should not feel obliagted to do thus, but to avoid feeling bad I'd probably put a small metal dog type crate over the hole. Without the base so rain goes into the grass. Then cat can bolt to safety through Hole but doesn't have access to your garden.
I'm always wary of going to war with neighbours as it can make life so horrible.

Their cat needs a vet. Excessive diarrhea isnt normal. Kidney problems in cats kill them. Quickly

This. To put it bluntly, this isn't likely to be an issue for much longer. My old cat was like this when suffering with kidney problems but we only let it go on for a few days while waiting for test results, and when they came back with a very poor prognosis we had her euthanised to end her suffering. They are being unbelievably cruel to that poor cat and it sounds like it's going to die a prolonged and painful death fairly soon.

Block the fence hole off. Once the cat is pouring liquid shit all over their garden they will have it treated or euthanased in no time.

These are not good neighbours and kind people. They are mad folk who treat your garden as a cat toilet- no wonder they don’t want it stuck in their garden to poo everywhere. They could keep their dog inside part of the time, they could take the cat it to the vet, they could keep it inside . All reasonable choices.
Nail up the hole, Place cat spikes etc , prepare a water pistol and block these people from all contact .

That cat probably has CKD and needs renal food which they are denying it.

What about the other two sides of the fence? Why cant they open that up so the cat goes there instead of into your garden?

The cat poo could be dangerous to your children. You’d only know if a cat had toxoplasmosis by testing it/ its poo. It causes blindness as you probably know.

They are calling you Karen because you don’t want cat poo in your garden. Nasty people.

Unbelievable cat toilet garden entitled neighbours.

If they can't have a cat and a dog at the same time, they shouldn't have a cat and a dog at the same time.

I have a cat who has 'sensitive' bowels* and is prone to messy poos, though not as bad as this one sounds - when a neighbour mentioned it we were mortified and bought them a gift as an apology, as well as taking steps to make our our garden a more attractive spot for him to go, plus offering our neighbour a water pistol to deter him in a safe way!
If their cat isn't safe when their dog is out, they need to supervise when they let the dog out. It isn't your problem to solve.

*We have taken him to the vets many times and it's been trials of different foods, overall he's improved but it seems to be a breed specific issue

Also I'd be tempted to tell them that your close family member has just got a [prey driven dog type] and will be dropping by regularly so you can't risk their cat being in your garden because the dog might be there. Use their own logic against them, you're only thinking of their cats safety after all...