Dropping her T’s

[Stick0rTwist]

My daughter has just gone into Yr1 and is an articulate child, relatively smart with a love for reading.

We moved her to a new school in the new year and have noticed since then she has started dropping her t’s when saying many of her words, like water, better, bottle, little etc.

This gets corrected consistently at home as although we don’t speak the queens English (and are not snobbish by any stretch of the imagination) we would prefer her to speak properly and not get into bad habits speech wise.

Over the summer holidays she was fine, but I’ve noticed in the two days she’s been back her speech has reverted back.

So here’s the AIBU - would I be unreasonable to mention this to her teacher? Or would I sound like a massive snob 🙈

Sounds dramatic but it’s even making me want to move her school again as this was not a problem at her old school at all. Its been a direct result of moving school as it started the week we moved.

So when Irish people say teme instead of theme, that's wrong?

Some accents omit/add letters... how do you pronounce castle? Doesn't have an 'R' in it, I don't pronounce it with an 'R', I know plenty of people who do, the difference is our accents.

It's a phase , it will pass. Honestly there is so much stress in life anyway, this is not worth worrying about. When my son was 6 he went through a phase of saying me instead of I because someone in his class spoke that way. It wasn't permanent!

OP, speaking as a (former) teacher who taught in London with a pronounced Yorkshire accent - would you have expected me to reinforce a particular dialect at the behest of a parent?

@Thursdayschild2025 , friend has a non-rhotic accent and slips into esjery out of laziness. Barf and bath have different meanings.

You do really sound pompous in your use of language. It makes you sound silly.

Stop with the insults too. It's unkind and uncalled for.

That is true - it's not quite 'sh' - I don't think the sound exists in English English.

Ha ha so true!

All the "oh ma dayyyyys" coming out of my 13yr old DD at the moment......

She'll stop eventually! 😂

This is likely a phase and will pass, probably quite quickly. My older two did this when they started P1 then stopped after a bit. No need to mention it to the teacher who will likely be pronouncing her ts correctly and frankly have bigger concerns. Just keep modelling it properly at home.

No, it would be an Irish accent, not sloppy speech.

I'm from NI where we have rhotic accents versus much of England which is non-rhotic.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rhoticity_in_English

Do you say far-mer or fa-ma?

Which is the correct way of pronouncing words like farmer?

In a similar situation a teacher offered me this explanation. They alter speech to fit in with their peers, the parents wince, later and with more maturity they can have two voices, one for the playground and one at home. Drawing attention can be counterproductive, keep modelling clear speech and encourage audiobooks etc with clear speech. Apart from that let it be.

@AnPiscin , giro was girl. In some accents it sounds like giro.

Interesting.
What about people who migrate for life to a different English-speaking country? Such as to/from the USA, Australia, Nigeria, or South Africa.

There are those that have soaked up and adopted the local accent in a matter of a few years, and those who still have the exact same accent as their home country many decades later, their speech doesn't change at all.
Do you find the first group of people repugnant?

I don’t think you sound like a snob at all. You want her to sound like her family. My daughter came home from nursery saying “wa- er’” instead of water, and it sounded very odd. We laughed and joked about it and it just faded away, she reverted to her usual diction.

I’ve had the same with my kids for their entire lives, they’re now mid-late teens.
All you can do is consistently correct at home, I’ve found they go in and out of phases of doing it.

Definitely v unreasonable to speak to the teacher about it though!

'Irish people' say no such thing. It's limited to a few specific working-class regional accents. Like some English accents pronouncing 'th' as 'f'. 'Fanks, mate.'

No, don't mention it to her teacher. There is nothing the teacher can do to stop her picking up local speech patterns of her peers. What you'll probably find is that she is able to use both local pronounciation and the style you teach her at home interchangeably as she chooses, and as company dictates. I was never allowed to use dialect pronunciation at home, but tended to at school, now I find I automatically switch depending on who I'm talking to, both very natural to me.

So what is the boundary between an accent and 'sloppy speech'? As in, how do you decide which pronunciation falls into which category?

so a hard g, not a soft g like a j ?
What accent is this?

I think you understood my post - I'd like to give you credit for having that much intelligence - but as you're pretending not to, let me explain. I find the idea that you must change or face judgement repugnant, ie that people will not be accepted as they are purely because of how they sound.

If someone happens to pick up an accent that is not in any way the same as deliberately changing how you speak for fear of judgement. You know that though and I resent having to explain it. I should have ignored you.

@Brainstorm23 , by definition, [ˈfɑːmə]

If you sound the Rs, that's correct too, but IPA has limitations.
My opinion is that if people understand you, it's ok.

Ones that bug me are things like Drawring and Chester Draws. FFS, speak properly!

Of course you’re not going to reply now I’ve called you out for your belittling and snobbish posts.

Pathetic.

"Sloppy speech" is just a not-very-euphemistic way of saying "common accent". People naturally speak the way other people around them do, they're not individually choosing to drop letters out of "laziness". The only laziness is in these stereotypes about the working class.

You are being snobbish.

Do you judge people because of their accents? If not what’s the issue then? She speaks the way her friends do. Don’t meddle too much. What can teacher do? Tell whole class to speak in a way you find better or separate dd from her friends so she can speak in ‘correct accent’?