Dropping her T’s

[Stick0rTwist]

My daughter has just gone into Yr1 and is an articulate child, relatively smart with a love for reading.

We moved her to a new school in the new year and have noticed since then she has started dropping her t’s when saying many of her words, like water, better, bottle, little etc.

This gets corrected consistently at home as although we don’t speak the queens English (and are not snobbish by any stretch of the imagination) we would prefer her to speak properly and not get into bad habits speech wise.

Over the summer holidays she was fine, but I’ve noticed in the two days she’s been back her speech has reverted back.

So here’s the AIBU - would I be unreasonable to mention this to her teacher? Or would I sound like a massive snob 🙈

Sounds dramatic but it’s even making me want to move her school again as this was not a problem at her old school at all. Its been a direct result of moving school as it started the week we moved.

Yep it has

Of course those people have an accent @CrostaDiPizza - if they're from England they have an English accent! Do you seriously not get that?

Yes I do, though I pronounce mine. I don't have a problem with people who don't. I actually love the diversity of UK accents. Surely we all have favourite accents? I'm from the West of Scotland, but love an East Coast accent. I love the Geordie accent, the Welsh accent and anything Irish (North or South). There are accents that aren't my favourites but I can understand what people are saying as we all speak the same language!

Not necessarily. It very much depends on the accent and how strong it is, as well as if any dialect is thrown in.

Yes, I agree. I think people who speak with English accents should be corrected and made to speak with midwestern American accents. Much easier to understand.

Can you tell me one you don't understand?

You are not the OP though are you and she doesn’t like it, she is perfectly entitled not to like it

I had parents with different regional accents and lived in several different areas as my family moved around a lot. My DM told me that I adopted the local accent wherever we were living in order to fit in with the kids in that area.
It has proved to be very useful as an adult to be able to switch into a range of different accents easily. My default accent is neutral and yes I do pronounce my ‘t’s

Oh well, better not post again then as opinions aren't wanted. Thanks for pointing that out to me on an opinion forum.🙄

Same with me. You tend to speak like the people around you.
I wouldn't worry too much about it, OP. Don't be that parent who is telling your kid off all the time and making them feel small and guilty for trying to fit in.

Have you tried Geordie, Glasweigan or strong Scouse?!

You're considering CHANGING SCHOOL because your 5 year old is using a glottal stop in some words?

By all means, talk to the teacher if you want to give everyone in the staff room a good laugh.

Bad habits? What are you actually talking about?!

According to the incomparable Susie Dent - arguably one of the leading lexicographers in this country - English is an evolving, truly democratised language where usage is king.

You may not like that your daughter is dropping her Ts, you may not like slang, or colloquialisms, or even the changing nature of language, but there's very little you can do about it.

On a broader note, you can make a reasonable argument that the purpose of language is to communicate thought. As long as the speech is intelligible and clear, does it really matter if somebody communicates in a manner you don't consider 'correct' or 'proper'. If the answer is yes then, I'm afraid, the problem may be you.

@Octavia64 I see the word “water” and I say “fish”- that's not pronunciation, that is using the wrong word.
Wa'er - is a regional pronunciation it's not dialect.

@ThisChicPinkRaven , I think you mean Susie Dent.

Ah, thanks. I'd only heard the name, not seen it written. Edited.

If it's any consolation my 'natural' accent is like Peggy Mitchell doing a Danny Dyer impression, yet right now I'm roughly halfway through a successful career in commercial law and regularly advise many of the very largest financial institutions in the UK. Sure I probably put on a bit of polish when talking to clients, but having dropped Ts, Hs and committed all sorts of other linguistic faux pas as a child hasn't lead a life of penury.

When my DS was in nursery he came home and he wanted to 'go toilet', I corrected him to say 'go to the toilet', as 'go toilet' sounded awful to me. Yes, it was a class thing, but I didn't want him to say it, so I corrected him.

There may be readers who find the word 'toilet' awful, but I'm in NI and toilet is standard, but if a parent wants a child to say lavatory, that's their perogative.

We correct our kids when they're toddlers without destroying their self-confidence, how can they continue to learn if parents are afraid to correct mistakes?

This topic reminds me of the lines sung by Henry Higgins in one of the musical numbers from 'My Fair Lady':

"An Englishman's way of speaking absolutely classifies him.
The moment he talks he makes some other Englishman despise him"

@Differentforgirls , regional accents vary. Saying you understand all if them suggests that you haven't encountered any fast speakers with strong regional accents who are using dialect.

@ThisChicPinkRaven "On a broader note, you can make a reasonable argument that the purpose of language is to communicate thought."

So when a Londoner says "bas" are they talking about a method of transport or a type of beer?

In Norfolk "I loike moi boike" can be confusing.

The town of Saltfleetby in Lincolnshire is pronounced "Soloby" and Louth is pronounced "Loweth" - that fooled me for a while when I first moved there.

I'm sure there are many more...

Literally everyone has an accent. You're deluded or under-informed if you think otherwise.

Only in England have I ever come across anyone who is self-absorbed enough to think they don't have accent, as though theirs is the 'correct' or 'perfect' way of speaking and everyone else in the whole world is a deviation. It is extraordinarily small minded.

If you are from England you have an English accent. If you go to Ireland you will be the one who is not speaking 'properly' - you will sound very different to the voices around you and some people will not understand you. Because you have an accent, like every single other person in the entire world.

Where did I say you weren’t entitled to an opinion?!🤷‍♀️

@AncientHarpy I hate the word literally. It is overused and usually weakens the sentence.

They have a neutral accent then. An accent that says they are educated and from England, but not whereabouts in England. Some accents are so strong can be matched to a postcode.

I'm neither deluded or under-informed and I'm pretty good at recognising accents.

@AnPiscin , you seem to have a chip on your shoulder about being Irish. i quite like an Irish accent but was confused when someone was telling me about the bords in her garden.

My daughter is a similar age and drops her t’s sometimes as we live in an area where many people do. I speak with a softer northern accent and don’t drop my t’s and I’m relatively ‘well spoken’. I do think that my daughters accent will also soften eventually and be a soft manc accent if this is where we stay. I personally try not to overthink it. It makes sense that she is emulating her peers and other adults at school.

I do think making a big deal out of your daughters accent could affect her self esteem and and actually exacerbate the issue as she may lean in to it in order to fit in as she gets older.