Should we buy the car or give her the money?

[sunshinehunter9]

So my dd turns 18 next month, her driving test is 2 days before her birthday. She has a trust fund with 2 grand that was set aside in the hope she buys a car with it, but only she can access it. I know she absolutely loves a certain car in a certain colour and magically one is for sale near us asking for 1500.
I think we should buy the car then take the 1500 back once she empties her trust fund. Leaving her with 500 cash plus all the gifts we have already bought her. My DH thinks we should just give her the full fund and it's up to her how much she spends on the car.
Who is being unreasonable?

YABU - give her the full amount
Or
YANBU - use the money for the car and give her the 500

Also for note my DD really wants a car however she loves Temu and shopping and I doubt the money will go to a car in the long run and it was saved for that purpose.

Indeed. Both my nieces got cars when they passed their tests in Y13. Neither took their car up to university.

If only she can access it as you stated in your first post then it's her money. But then you changed your story to say it's your account, so who knows.

If someone bought me a car, put a bow on it and then told me I owed them £1500 I'd think they needed sectioned.

For absolute clarity, an account in your name, with her named on it, is STILL her money, even if it's your money going in to it. To say that it's not would be classed as tax evasion.

It's all getting very complicated, you could just tell her about her trust fund on her birthday and let her decide what to spend it on, as you've already bought gifts. The worst thing is she doesn't pass and the cars on the drive.

You can't buy her a car with her money and no prior discussion. You don't know what she wants and aren't factoring in all the running costs of a car that is old enough to only cost £1.5k. A present that she could do as she wished with is totally different.

You can’t spend her money for her, that’s not good. If it’s a ‘surprise’ then you buy it. If it’s not, then it needs to be a considered decision from her.

Who is paying for car insurance, tax, mot, service, petrol, break down cover ?

She should be paying this too

So it’s not a trust fund at all then

it’s just savings you have put away

It might be like my daughter's, in my name whilst she's under 18 and will switch to her and not me.

So OP won't be able to access the money if it's a child's account anyway.

Take her to view the car as soon as possible. Once she's faced with the prospect of actually owning it, she is in a better position to decide.

...who's money do you think is in it?
It isn't your money unless you saved it only in your name.
£2000 is under 18 months of child benefit money. Most people who are able to will save some money for their kids, you aren't really the bountiful donor you're imagining here.

Just give her your gifts, give her the trust fund, and let her use your car when she's at home.

Aye cause a young girl who's learning in a fiat 500 is gonna be able to drive my large Peugeot 5008 and yes I think I am the 'bountiful donor' I'm imaging, a lot of kids don't have the luxury of a savings account these days.

We've decided to buy the car. Thanks for all the opinions, we spoke about it in great detail last night. She's going to be very excited on her birthday.

I don't think you can do a big reveal with a bow etc for something she has effectively paid for herself

Why are you popping a bowl on it. You will lead her to think you bought it as her 18th birthday present. Then make her pay.

Either tell her one is for sale and you can sub her until she can draw down the cash or but it as a gift. Don't go through the pretence of it being a gift.

If it’s her money, you can only suggest and advise. If it’s your money, you can decide, but it would be nicer to discuss it with her.

Why put a bow on it when it's not a present?

With your money or hers?

I'm confused, are you buying it with your money, or hers?

Who will pay for the insurance OP? I was pricing up cars and insurance for my DD’s 18th and most quotes were around the £2k mark.

I don’t understand why you are asking how to spend an 18 year olds money.

If it's an actual trust fund then it's her money and you can't spend it on her behalf. You can only spend your own money and hope she pays you back. Suppose she's planning to use the money for something else and refuses? She'd have every right.
On the other hand if by 'trust fund' you mean you've saved up some money to give her a splendid birthday present, then you can spend it on a car, but you still need to consider whether she can afford to run it and how much you are prepared to help out.
Just seen your update. OK, it's not a trust fund, just some money you've saved up to give her - or not give her - on her 18th.

literally a friend of mine and all her dance friends have got fiat 500s and adore them! I feel you’ve made the right decision!

The decision is not OPs to make though.

Unless I’ve read this completely wrong it’s because it’s not actually the 18 year old’s money yet until she gets presented with it for her birthday? The OP has saved £2000 in a “trust fund” which was going to be given as a surprise birthday gift. The OP is asking whether to give a gift of the money or gift of car plus £500. The DD is completely unaware that the money or possibility of car exists.

As pretty much everyone else has said, you're essentially spending your daaghter's money for her, then going to put a bow on it as if it's a gift. Really bad idea - you should absolutely speak to her about it first