That an adults only resort should mean that!

[hotelheartbreak]

DH and I have been to Hell and back with IVF and have finally started to accept we won’t be able to have a baby. As part of that journey we decided to treat ourselves to an amazing holiday, to grieve and accept our new normal. We have been careful to plan to stay at adults only resorts and we’ve just checked into our first one, and there are kids everywhere! Apparently you need to be 18 to stay in the resort, but not to meet the minimum spend at the beach club pool bar and there are kids everywhere. Surely this defeats the point?

Oh lordy, just the vivid mental image this conjoined up really made me laugh!

I take it you didn’t book your own private villa?

I’ve looked for places to stay overseas and the nicer places are adults only - which means we can’t stay there.

I would be so angry at having booked there for the reason you booked there (unable to conceive and their advertising it was child free) and feel it’s a massive misrepresentation on the resort’s part!

But I’m wondering if you accidentally booked your vacation during school holidays? Before I had a baby I used to make sure I never took time off during school holidays because kids would really annoy me. It’s so much worse for you though and I do empathise.

I once walked into the lobby of an adult only hotel with my 14 yo DD who was desperate for the toilet and we were immediately asked to leave as it was adults only!

But I’m wondering if you accidentally booked your vacation during school holidays?

OP might be a teacher, who would have no choice but to book during school holidays.

Another vote here for Club 30-50! Actually I'm now more in the SAGA age bracket, but I would have LOVED a guaranteed child-free hotel with only absolute adults.

YANBU at all OP!!

Omg I would be spitting feathers! I cannot fathom why certain parents are so unbelievably entitled and insist on imposing their brats on adults only spaces. I would demand to be compensated immediately as this is false advertising. If nothing is done, I would write the most damning online review. I would also be inclined to approach the parents ask them whether they are aware that they are in an adults only resort and that their children are causing a disturbance to guests. Or if you prefer a passive aggressive approach, play some loud music with plenty of swearing on your phone, if the parents contest this, inform them that they are not permitted to be there.

That really sucks. I know what a huge step it is to give up on the IVF it's almost like a grieving process and the last thing you need is other people's kids in your face. Sending hugs

im sorry for your struggles. You’re right to be upset- I have a child and if I went to an adult only place I’d expect to only see adults (and not listen to kids shrieking). You should complain and depending on what the hotel does about it, write a review.

Agree speak to travel agent and get moved to adult only

Sadly you can get poor behaviour from all ages.

We’ve stayed in a couple of Adults Only hotels. While it was lovely not to have screaming children in the pool and Peppa Pig in the restaurant we replaced it with loud FaceTime calls from the next sunbed to what seemed like the entire family back home and another couple who spent every mealtime showing each other TikTok videos…

(And there was definitely more loud snoring during the post-lunch siesta at the pool! 😂😂😂)

I was SO happy that the resort we went to had lots of signs AND did enforce the use of headphones when using devices.

I would definitely complain.

If you have traveled via an agent you could ask about the possibility of being moved to another hotel that is genuinely adult only if there is one within a reasonable distance?

If you haven't, I would complain initially to the manager of the hotel, making them aware that you will also be raising this with the company that you booked through (if not booked directly with the hotel of course) and request some form of compensation.

Where are the children coming from?

That Would ruin the stay for me. If I book an adults only holiday it’s because I want a certain kind of rest. I look for quiet places where I can sit by the pool and read without much noise.

I’d be furious. I agree you’d be well within your right to complain and demand a refund.
Im sorry your lovely holiday has been spoiled.

YANBU

Sex And Games for the Aged said the late comedian Ken Dodd.

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2025/aug/16/call-to-ban-intolerant-child-free-resorts-and-hotels-in-france

The thing is, if it’s the same situation as when it happened to us in Greece, the parents and children were also invited to be there. They were being no more ‘entitled’ than we were. When we booked the hotel in the uk, it was advertised as child free. When we were there, the beach club very obviously welcomed families. If we’d approached a parent asking them if we were aware they were disturbing an adults only resort, they’d have thought we were mental, as their children had been given a specific wrist band when they paid (the child specific price) for them!

See also dog owners taking dogs onto dog free beaches in the summer. The entitlement and “rules don’t apply to us” mentality is outrageous.

Travel agents and holiday companies should only be allowed to advertise "adults only" if there are guaranteed to be no under 18s allowed. ATOL should get involved and issue heavy fines accordingly to those that false advertise this.

Thanks for all your kind words, DH and I spent yesterday doing the responsible thing and got pissed by the pool. We can hide in our own villa if we want, it has its own pool - but it’s nice to be on the beach.
Agree that adults can be just as annoying as kids, but it really isn’t what we thought we were getting. The resort has a restaurant / beach bar that you can buy a day pass for with a minimum spend. So yesterday it was full of entitled families getting high and or pissed whilst the local nanny stopped the kids from drowning.
It’s not school holidays where we live - but appreciate it is for most of Europe, but we are in Asia and this time was the time that worked for us and our work - and stress levels.
Let’s see what today brings!
We booked it directly - so the only people I can complain to is the hotel directly.

Where is the hotel? In Spain, it is illegal not to allow children in hotels due to anti discrimination laws. This is from google.

'While Spanish law prevents outright discrimination against families, hotels can still market themselves as being "recommended for adults" or having a more mature atmosphere, a practice that is legally permissible and has replaced the outright "adults only" designation'

We were surprised to see children in what we thought was an adults only hotel on the Costa del Sol a few years ago.

I know what you mean. We booked a hotel in Benalmadina which was for adults. When we arrived we were told our booking had been cancelled, and we were moved to their sister hotel right up by Malaga, the Riu Costa del Sol. We were not happy, but they gave us a lovely sea view suite, and it was all inclusive. But, it was twice the size of what we booked, not where we wanted to be, and was full of families. We were not happy, but short of demanding our money back, there was not much more we could have done. It would have cost us time and more money to book a hotel close to where we wanted to be, so we accepted the move, and made the most of the AI facilities. When you are looking forward to a quiet relaxing week, and end up with a week of noisy, loud and entertainment aimed at families, it is annoying.

Can you share what hotel it is?