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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Immigrants but legal ones?

484 replies

Tiktakmam · 30/08/2025 08:36

I’ve been living in the UK for 16 years, have two children, and work full-time. I consider myself integrated, living according to British values, and respecting this country. I look after myself and my home, and I try to contribute positively to the community.

Yet, many of us — especially from Eastern Europe — don’t feel entirely safe with the ongoing issues around illegal migrant boats. Even though we are legal residents, I’ve noticed growing dissatisfaction from some neighbours. When I mention that I’m from Eastern Europe, I often hear comments like, “Of course you are…” — basically implying I’m not British.

This makes me feel like I’ve somehow “brought these boats” here, as if I’m just another part of the immigrant problem. Seeing flags and attitudes that suggest “immigrants go home” is disheartening.

I also feel somewhat less confident around British people, especially in areas with mostly locals and fewer immigrants. For example, when I travel to campsites or smaller towns, I sometimes feel looked at as untrustworthy. Luckily, in London I feel much less like this.

Post-Brexit, it feels like the country has changed in ways that make life less secure, not just for immigrants but for everyone. It’s heartbreaking that all migrants, legal or not, are often dropped into one pot and judged as a single group.

I keep wondering — after so many years of people from other countries contributing to making the UK a brighter, more vibrant place, why does it feel like the country has been going downhill over time?

I feel so heartbroken, because I understand that the UK will never truly be my home, as I was not born here. Yet it hurts to realize that, with every passing year, it feels more and more like I will never be fully welcome.

Why has it gone so wrong on a broader scale? How can we have a healthier, safer society for everyone, while respecting the law and supporting integration?

I hope we can have a conversation about this that goes beyond fear and politics, and focuses on community, fairness, and safety for all residents.
Im just curious, in this era of migrant boats and heightened tension around immigration, how do you perceive or feel about other immigrants, even those who are legal residents? Does this climate affect the way you interact with them or how you feel about other immigrants, especially in less multicultural towns? What does your family of friends say?

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NoVibrato · 02/09/2025 14:05

Ihavetoask · 30/08/2025 10:07

For racists, yes being white is a pretty requisite and it has to be for as many generations as possible unless it was to do with the sexual exploitation of slaves.

Actually, in the 40's and 50's one could find signs outside cheap boarding houses saying "no dogs, no Irish" --so not even being white saved the Irish! We have a long track record of nasty parochialism.

Hiddendisability12 · 02/09/2025 14:15

My pal was born and bred in Manchester as are her three children. She and her children are dark skinned of and are 2nd and 3rd generation from Kerala. Both her parents were invited to the UK as GPs and experts in their field. She looks after her three nieces after her brother died last year and is a single mum in charge of six kids. We have all been camping together a couple of times over the summer, she is eyes with suspicion asked why she has so many children, asked where her husband is, has he gone home? To where Bolton? She is very blunt and funny tells hem the kids are her dead brother's and is done with it but I hate it for her and her kids. I'm white if it was me nobody would ask me all of those questions.

poetryandwine · 02/09/2025 16:46

Rainydayinlondon · 02/09/2025 13:44

A google search said that the main immigrants to Ireland are from the UK and Ukraine.
When they say the UK, do they mean from Northern Ireland?

Great question. All British citizens have right of abode in the RoI, and vice versa. NI is so small that I would be surprised if your statement is true, but not desperately so.

Why not ask Google?

Ihavetoask · 03/09/2025 07:54

NoVibrato · 02/09/2025 14:05

Actually, in the 40's and 50's one could find signs outside cheap boarding houses saying "no dogs, no Irish" --so not even being white saved the Irish! We have a long track record of nasty parochialism.

The Irish became white.

WhenYouSayNothingAtAll · 04/09/2025 18:17

DD got told today by a classmate that I’m a gypsy because I’m from a certain EE country, as an insult. Fun times , but I Guess it could’ve been worse .

Mixedmix · 08/09/2025 22:21

pointythings · 31/08/2025 16:31

More people are reporting hate crimes nowadays, but they didn’t use to. We just tried to ignore the racism. That’s why the data isn’t reliable. In my experience, the UK was a lot more racist in the 2000s and 2010s when I was at school. Less racism nowadays.

thepariscrimefiles · 09/09/2025 09:36

JudithDunbar · 31/08/2025 16:18

But if you are thinking logically then you must know that the percentage of people who feel negatively towards someone simply for having a different skin colour is immeasurably small. It is dishonest and disingenuous to pretend that that is the source of peoples resentment. I've lived in London all my life and Sadiq Khan is loathed by the small remnant of indigenous Londoners, but that is not because he has brown skin.

Of course a lot of people hate Sadiq Khan because of the colour of his skin and his religion. Anyway, he has been voted into office three times by Londoners.

What is an 'indigenous Londoner'? Are they the descendants of the group of east London dockers and Smithfield porters who famously marched in support of Enoch Powell's anti-immigrant "rivers of blood" speech in 1968? Proper racists, not the more covert 'are you thinking what I'm thinking' ones.

thepariscrimefiles · 09/09/2025 09:40

Livelovebehappy · 31/08/2025 16:56

Agree. I think it’s a far better option for countries to adopt a point system like Canada and Australia, so we are only accepting people with the skills we need, and who aren’t going to be a drain on our finances here. I have relatives in Canada, and back about 20 years ago, applied to emigrate there. I failed on the points system, despite having a grandmother there, and an aunt who had actually offered me a job til I got settled. I was disappointed, but accepted that it is what it is, and I wasn’t someone they thought would bring any benefit to their country.

The UK does have a points based system though.

https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/uk-points-based-immigration-system-employer-information/the-uks-points-based-immigration-system-an-introduction-for-employers

The UK's points-based immigration system: an introduction for employers (accessible version)

https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/uk-points-based-immigration-system-employer-information/the-uks-points-based-immigration-system-an-introduction-for-employers

pointythings · 09/09/2025 14:16

Don't confuse the poor dears with facts....

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